Kaliko
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Joined: 9/25/2010
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quote:
ORIGINAL: shannie
quote:
ORIGINAL: Kaliko
But taking it down to a child in a school system, you're not talking about mean vs. not mean. You're talking about the ability to provide the same educational environment for all within a school. If a child has insults hurled at him as he walks into school, then his ability to learn is hampered by reaction to something that's happening within the school's control and is directed solely at him.
That's all. That's really all it is. Providing the same educational opportunities for each student in the school. It's nice that as a result of the laws we do wind up with some nicer-acting kids, and it's not to say that school officials don't care unless forced to by law. But the intensity with which schools are now reacting to potential bullying situations is, indeed, because they are now forced to by law - not only to train, investigate, and discipline, but to prove - in every instance - that they did.
So these are two different things. The world...and the school.
My friend's seven-year-old kid was put on "bully probation" at school for calling a kid "stupidhead." Lol.
The problem is that schools/teachers always take these things to absurd (and even violent) extremes the minute they're given the opportunity to do so. This "bully" thing is being used, just like everything always is, to justify even more police power in schools. Now we won't have bullies, we'll have kids labeled as bullies at the drop of a hat, and kids pepper-sprayed, strip searched, and tasered in school. It's happening all over the country. But I guess the "anti-bully" stuff doesn't apply to "authority figures."
Well, there are a few ways the school is looking at that comment.
1. The student who was called the name could have been truly affected by it (for whatever reason) and perhaps he was just walking into a test and wasn't able to concentrate and did poorly. Now, of course, a child can't be protected from every little thing that might affect his thinking. But within the school environment, and something that is directly pointed at that particular student - yes, that in fact can be controlled.
2. Or...the student who was called the name didn't care at all. And so the student who did the name calling sees no consequence. And either the student continues to name-call others (or that same student) thinking he is doing no damage, when clearly it wouldn't be acceptable behavior, or he escalates and says or does worse in order to provoke reaction. Without someone telling him NO, he has no reason to stop.
3. Or....other students heard the name-calling incident and, seeing no consequence arise, believes it to be acceptable behavior.
4. Or...other students heard the name-calling incident and felt intimated themselves for future interaction with that student.
Again...I want to make clear that I in no way support protecting a child from everything in his life that may make him sad or upset. What I do support is taking the steps to minimize the number of incidents happening in (or around) the school and directly pointed at that one student. If it's too cold in a classroom and a kid can't concentrate, that's not done to directly torment that child. But if a child is too cold in a classroom and can't concentrate because a bully took his sweater, that needs to be addressed with consequence.
And...I guess this is just a difference of opinion, but I would be appalled if my child ever called someone a name like that. Being insulting to someone in that way is one heck of an offense in my house. I would like to think that if the school (or another student) heard something like that from her, that she would face consequences for it.
I agree that the whole concept of bullying in schools these days is kind of a catch-all. It has to be - laws are requiring it to be so, not the schools. Overall, I believe the concept is a good one, once I finally understood it myself. (I wasn't always on the side I am now about it.)
I think it will take a few years for parents to get used to that sort of culture (because when we grew up it was different) but the kids in schools these days are already more accepting of it. It will be interesting to see how our grade schooled kids who are now growing up with bully prevention being an inherent part of their day will be as high school students. I think many will be watching to see if disciplinary behaviors go down in number.
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RE: Bullying? - 
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