RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (Full Version)

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mnottertail -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 7:35:54 AM)

Save your lips for me; squaw!!!!




TheLilSquaw -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 7:36:38 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

Luckily, I don't at the moment.  I'm getting wood from the ungluings.


The wind blowing in the right direction gave you wood. :)




cpd0509 -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 7:37:37 AM)

Deleted. What was I thinking?




TheLilSquaw -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 7:38:11 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

Save your lips for me; squaw!!!!


[:)]




Moonlightmaddnes -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 7:38:40 AM)

Real rape victims enjoy it???? NO. Been there done that. There was nothing fun or enjoyable about it. He said he would kill me and I believed he would. I was terrified for months he would come back. You obviously have no clue what you are talking about.

Now fantasy is very very different. Having someone I trust do what they please and there is nothing I can do about it is completely different. I love and trust him. He would never hurt me and I know that.




Notsweet -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 7:42:18 AM)

Ok, here. If we take rape out of the equation:

If you have an urge to stick your dick in a pickle slicer, that's a bad idea.
She's got a mean, jealous husband. Stick it in the cashier instead.

Does that help?




con8ken -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 8:20:15 AM)

I don't come to make up stuff and lie, why would I, if You haven't answered me then you havnt, whether you believe you have or not, and making other stuff up and taking things out of context is no help to me, i came to get an idea on people views and have questions I have answered, which no one has done. It seems that people don't want to communicate they just want to push their view on you without challenge. Anyway this wasn't a complete failure, I have learnt its hard to get a straight answer and people become defensive in an online forum when people feel your threatening their beliefs or knocking their lifestyle, even if all your doing is looking for answers. The OP was my opinion as I saw it then, Although I may still find something's weird or extreme, its not my business what people get upto, and their not bothered what I think anyway. Some of you have given me some food for thought and others not. My intension was to provoke thought in myself but ended up just provoking others. I go in peace....




Notsweet -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 8:37:57 AM)

Con, it's really hard to decipher your writing. Not a criticism, but a critique. Also why you might not be getting your answer.




cordeliasub -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 8:53:49 AM)

I think the key word that you are leaving out is consent

Yeah yeah...technically and legally speaking, if there is consent it isn't rape.

This "nuts" sub you talked to who dreamed or fantasized about being raped.....I doubt she meant that one day when she is walking back to her car at the grocery store she hopes a violent stranger grabs her, hurts her, and forcibly rapes her, ignoring her sincere cries of no. What is the difference between that and...one day her Dominant decides to fulfill her fantasy by waiting for her in a parking lot, jumping her, and playing out a rape...

CONSENT

Just because a woman wants to be controlled by a man she trusts with her CONSENT does NOT mean she wants to be raped in the legal definition of rape. I don;t think it is the sub you talked to who is having trouble making the distinction.




con8ken -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 9:20:43 AM)

I don't mind criticism, its a chance to reflect and change, if i deem it necessary.
I can see how my writing can be hard to follow, and could be the reason why Im not getting the answers. Ill make more of an effort to present it more clearly.

This sub I spoke to actually said by a stranger in the legal definition of the word.
I have no trouble making the distinction.
She said it would be the ultimate for her, and if it were to happen her it wouldn't cause her to become damaged an stress about it.
She knew the distinction between the two, I asked her if she did and she explained.
She said, she purposefully walks down dark alleys and deserted streets, roads/places at night sometimes, hoping someone will attack her. I was taken aback by this and thought, she's nuts her.

That is why I thought some people need protecting from themselves.
And just because you can doesn't mean you should.




littlewonder -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 9:21:04 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: con8ken

The LilSquaw I state some victims enjoyed some aspects of being raped, the original point was that of a masochist actively seeking to be raped in reality. You then flipped it and started talking about victims who have no inclination to any of the aspects.



Yeah, I so enjoyed being drugged raped. I so enjoyed when I had a gun stuck to my stomach at 8 months pregnant. Yup, boy was it fun! [8|]

Boy, go back to school. You need to learn how to write so that people understand you for one. The other is that you have sooooo much education to get through yet.




absolutchocolat -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 9:22:14 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: con8ken

I don't come to make up stuff and lie, why would I, if You haven't answered me then you havnt, whether you believe you have or not, and making other stuff up and taking things out of context is no help to me, i came to get an idea on people views and have questions I have answered, which no one has done. It seems that people don't want to communicate they just want to push their view on you without challenge. Anyway this wasn't a complete failure, I have learnt its hard to get a straight answer and people become defensive in an online forum when people feel your threatening their beliefs or knocking their lifestyle, even if all your doing is looking for answers. The OP was my opinion as I saw it then, Although I may still find something's weird or extreme, its not my business what people get upto, and their not bothered what I think anyway. Some of you have given me some food for thought and others not. My intension was to provoke thought in myself but ended up just provoking others. I go in peace....


I'm pretty sure you're the only one who is defensive here. TheLilSquaw and mnottertail have tried to reason with you to no avail. My advice to you is the following, in bullet form so it sinks in:

-Read and understand the studies on rape that have been posted. Seriously...because you don't seem to get it. Being a rape victim and consensual nonconsent (others have called it "rape fantasies", "kidnap and torture", etc.) are two completely different things. The latter is fun as hell -- yep, tried it -- and the former can leave physical, emotional, and psychological scars for a lifetime.

-Unless you're one of them damn university students looking for no-fuss thesis research here, venture out into your local munch and chat with experienced folks.

-Open your fucking mind, for Christ's sake. I used to be like you...judging the kinks of others and sitting on my high horse, thinking I had all the answers. The awesome thing about this lifestyle is that there's always more to experience, more to learn, and more to feel.

Good luck to you, in any case. I suspect you'll need all the help you can get.




Notsweet -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 9:28:46 AM)

Ok, if that's the situation, that's she's specifically putting herself in risky situations, in harm's way, so that she isn't consenting, then yes, she's batshit crazy, you can't rescue her, and stay the hell away from her. Are there crazy people in the world? Yes. She's crazy. Don't put your dick in crazy. And don't try to rescue it unless you have the credentials (i.e., a post grad degree in social work, mental health, psychology; admitting privileges as a licensed physician; a gavel and a robe and a title of 'Your Honor;' a badge and a gun and the authorization to use both OR a big red ambulance). You will not come out ahead, or as a hero. You can't fix it.

Think that answers your question.




con8ken -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 9:32:31 AM)

I'm sick of people who haven't a clue that there chatting about something that isn't the same thing as I am???

Don't cut and paste whatever bit of text you like, take it out of context, and post it as some sort of justification for your misunderstanding.







con8ken -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 9:35:54 AM)

Thanks notsweet your the first to give me a straight answer.

I obviously should have wrote it that way in the first place.




littlewonder -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 9:40:44 AM)

I posted your entire response. There was no cut and paste. It was a direct quote. Maybe try making your point clearly in the first place instead of leaving us to have to figure out what the hell you're talking about.




con8ken -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 9:45:53 AM)

You posted the response, but you didn't understand what it was a response to??




littlewonder -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 9:46:57 AM)

I read it. You seem to be confused about rape and completely uneducated that it's actually scarey.




con8ken -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 9:47:52 AM)

LilSquaw was trying to say that I was saying, that all victims some aspects of being raped.




con8ken -> RE: New to bdsm and find a lot of it weird?? (1/23/2013 9:49:49 AM)

Littlewonder if you can't understand what I'm saying, ask a question, instead of making pathetic remarks. You clear haven't a clue of what I'm saying.




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