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[Poll]

What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex?


Once tied up, we almost always have sex
  43% (43)
Once tied up, we sometimes have sex
  26% (26)
Once tied up, we rarely have sex
  11% (11)
Bondage is foreplay - we have sex after
  11% (11)
Bondage destroys the mood
  3% (3)
Sex is never involved with bondage
  4% (4)


Total Votes : 98
(last vote on : 1/11/2014 8:34:57 AM)
(Poll will run till: -- )
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RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/2/2013 2:21:30 PM   
Arturas


Posts: 3245
Status: offline 		So, we need an: Only on Friday nights in dark and foreboding cage scenes. Even one vote is hot.

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RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/2/2013 5:36:46 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline 		No sex?

I'm sorry....what are we talking about again?

(in reply to pompeii)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/2/2013 6:50:51 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		If there's no sex involved, then it isn't worth talking about.

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(in reply to LookieNoNookie)
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RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/2/2013 7:43:43 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

If there's no sex involved, then it isn't worth talking about.


My apologies....you are CORRECT!!!!

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/2/2013 8:28:09 PM   
Blonderfluff


Posts: 2253
Joined: 10/9/2013
From: Down the Shore
Status: offline 		I popped in because I saw "helpless bondage". When I read it all the way, I made a face. No sex? Waste of good rope and an hour of time that could have been spent having ......sex!!

I know there are many that love the helpless , safe feeling that bondage can bring.

But me??? Yeah. Sex.

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(in reply to LookieNoNookie)
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RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/2/2013 10:01:20 PM   
Spiritedsub2


Posts: 3316
Joined: 7/18/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LookieNoNookie


quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

If there's no sex involved, then it isn't worth talking about.


My apologies....you are CORRECT!!!!

Did you miss this guy's recent lecture to us all, that BDSM is not sex?
Here ya go: http://www.collarchat.com/m_4594174/tm.htm
It's a great tonic against insomnia.

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~ Rumi

Laughing Dolphin

(in reply to LookieNoNookie)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/3/2013 3:08:45 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Spiritedsub2


quote:

ORIGINAL: LookieNoNookie


quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

If there's no sex involved, then it isn't worth talking about.


My apologies....you are CORRECT!!!!

Did you miss this guy's recent lecture to us all, that BDSM is not sex?
Here ya go: http://www.collarchat.com/m_4594174/tm.htm
It's a great tonic against insomnia.


(Well, if it isn't, it damn well should be!)

(in reply to Spiritedsub2)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/3/2013 10:18:07 PM   
chatnoire


Posts: 17
Joined: 11/24/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: pompeii

What good is helpless bondage if the Top doesn't have sexual intercourse (in some fashion) with the sub?

Q: Once the submissive is helplessly bound, what do you prefer next?


For some people, the bondage is the end game. While I generally like my kink liberally sprinkled with sex, bondage is different for me.
The last mummification scene I did, I was floating away in sub space even before he had finished taping my fingers. His enjoyment came from being able to take me there. Sex would have most definitely spoiled the mood.

(in reply to pompeii)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/3/2013 11:25:58 PM   
Arturas


Posts: 3245
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: chatnoire


quote:

ORIGINAL: pompeii

What good is helpless bondage if the Top doesn't have sexual intercourse (in some fashion) with the sub?

Q: Once the submissive is helplessly bound, what do you prefer next?


For some people, the bondage is the end game. While I generally like my kink liberally sprinkled with sex, bondage is different for me.
The last mummification scene I did, I was floating away in sub space even before he had finished taping my fingers. His enjoyment came from being able to take me there. Sex would have most definitely spoiled the mood.


Yes. After launching a woman into sub space in a sex free session, it is not unllkely that after the session and after releasing her she chooses to remain on the whipping horse and slides a shapely high heeled leg between his legs and gently but firmly draws him to her or even on the drive home a Dom finds his submissive suddenly licking his fingers as a prelude to a very difficult drive starting in the next few seconds.

Arturas and star

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"We master Our world."

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RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/4/2013 10:42:47 AM   
Ilyrium


Posts: 189
Joined: 10/2/2013
Status: offline 		The definition of sex eludes me.
Does it include orgasm?
Is it orgasm?

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Profile   Post #: 70
RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/4/2013 1:06:24 PM   
Arturas


Posts: 3245
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Ilyrium

The definition of sex eludes me.
Does it include orgasm?
Is it orgasm?


SEX: sexually motivated phenomena or behavior that leads to or can lead to intercourse.

Thus, BDSM activities like hot waxing, needleplay or even whipping a bound woman are not sex. I assume intercourse leads to orgasm in your life. It does in mine. So even if the submissive unexpectedly begins licking her Dom's fingers while he is driving with one hand on the wheel and the other in her hands, one cannot say he launching her into sub space two hours earlier was "sex". Women are not that predictable, in my humble opinion.

Although I have seen that pattern, where the woman later after a session or even after a great night out on a vanilla date, falls into "sex space" and starts moving in a slow and very fluid manner in the most unlikely locals and at the most unexpected time to begin the most amazing and irresistable kink sex a Dom could ever hope for.

Arturas

< Message edited by Arturas -- 12/4/2013 1:16:49 PM >

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RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/4/2013 1:24:52 PM   
Arturas


Posts: 3245
Status: offline 		I do note that women in sub space also move fluidly in their bindings (see my last) so perhaps sub space does lead to sex space (my term, I think) perhaps because both states are triggered by physical and emotional and mental stimulations based on pain and pleasure, both closely related with pain being pleasure and vice versa in many, some, maybe really all women if the right buttons are pushed by the right man (or woman).

Arturas

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RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/17/2013 6:40:17 PM   
NeshiiKitti


Posts: 2
Joined: 12/17/2013
Status: offline 		It's never alright to assume that sexual intercourse is alright during a fetish scene, such as a bondage scene. You need to negotiate these things before anything, regardless of whether it's your sub or just a play partner. Some people don't associate sex with their kinks and you need to respect that. Non consensual sex is consider rape and that can get into serious trouble. All of this should be a no brainer.

(in reply to Arturas)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/17/2013 7:44:36 PM   
FrostedFlake


Posts: 3084
Joined: 3/4/2009
From: Centralia, Washington
Status: offline 		If the poll numbers are typical, big if, sure, it would seem that those who DO NOT equate kink and sex are both in the extreme minority and extremely loud about it.

Some of us prefer if we age going to get that excited and loud, to just go ahead and fuck.

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simul justus et peccator
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RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/18/2013 3:02:51 AM   
Dreamless


Posts: 104
Joined: 7/30/2010
Status: offline 		I'm just gonna hang out with the 'I tie guys up so they can't get away from me doing mean things to them' club.

I mean, that might include sex. Or sex things. Or just mindfuckery. Or just pain.

Why would I want to ruin perfectly good endorphins with an orgasm?

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RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/18/2013 3:04:32 PM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:


Why would I want to ruin perfectly good endorphins with an orgasm?

Because what's a symphony without a crescendo?

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RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/18/2013 5:42:57 PM   
MalcolmNathaniel


Posts: 1394
Joined: 9/20/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Ilyrium
The definition of sex eludes me.



Who are you? Bill Clinton?

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Profile   Post #: 77
RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/18/2013 9:52:04 PM   
cloudboy


Posts: 7306
Joined: 12/14/2005
Status: offline 		Bad bondage usually leads to the awkward moment of **telling the Dom** -- this isn't quite right because I can't feel my limb anymore....

My pet peeve is porno bondage of women tied up in some way-uncomfortable position with a vibrator attached to some long stick stuck between their legs. If some maledom tried that --- the woman upon release would slap him and call him a moron.

Caveat: Bondage inhibits movement -- which may inhibit the movement necessary for intimacy; ergo bondage might prevent good sex.

Don't forget: Bondage spring loads a sub for release.

< Message edited by cloudboy -- 12/18/2013 9:56:20 PM >

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RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/19/2013 3:47:06 AM   
Greta75


Posts: 9968
Joined: 2/6/2011
Status: offline 		The purpose of bondage is to restrict movements to intensify sensations of whippings or forced orgasms. Not necessarily penetrative sex has to happen, but I don't do bdsm without sex, but it may not happen while being in bondage. Like for example, my master could have already cum a load inside me, and then tie me up after to mess around with me with a vibrator or something.

For some, it may be just for photography, just for art.

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RE: What good is helpless bondage if there is no sex? - 12/19/2013 3:48:40 AM   
Greta75


Posts: 9968
Joined: 2/6/2011
Status: offline
quote:


My pet peeve is porno bondage of women tied up in some way-uncomfortable position with a vibrator attached to some long stick stuck between their legs. If some maledom tried that --- the woman upon release would slap him and call him a moron.


HUH!!!! ??? Are you serious? That is my favourite thing to happen to me! It's one of the kinks i regularly even suggest to vanilla men to do to me.
I've been tied up for more than an hour with a plug in vibrator on me. And it's one of my favourite experiences.


< Message edited by Greta75 -- 12/19/2013 3:49:03 AM >

(in reply to cloudboy)
Profile   Post #: 80
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