Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Dommes and money


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Dommes and money Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Dommes and money - 8/12/2014 5:01:11 PM   
Subano


Posts: 101
Joined: 1/15/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CalentraDomme

Am I the only Domme that feels men asking for things in exchange for money is insulting!!!!!! I know why they do it, but I am not to be bought! Makes Me a little angry that there are so many out there that can be bought, gives us lifestyle Dommes a bad rap.


Did I just enter the wrong universe?

(in reply to CalentraDomme)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Dommes and money - 8/12/2014 5:27:23 PM   
GotSteel


Posts: 5871
Joined: 2/19/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Subano
quote:

ORIGINAL: CalentraDomme
Am I the only Domme that feels men asking for things in exchange for money is insulting!!!!!! I know why they do it, but I am not to be bought! Makes Me a little angry that there are so many out there that can be bought, gives us lifestyle Dommes a bad rap.

Did I just enter the wrong universe?


Assuming that a woman is a prostitute is typically considered quite insulting.

(in reply to Subano)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Dommes and money - 8/12/2014 5:29:28 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CalentraDomme

Am I the only Domme that feels men asking for things in exchange for money is insulting!!!!!! I know why they do it, but I am not to be bought! Makes Me a little angry that there are so many out there that can be bought, gives us lifestyle Dommes a bad rap.


As a male sub, I am also not to be bought. I completely understand.

(in reply to CalentraDomme)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Dommes and money - 8/12/2014 5:34:14 PM   
GotSteel


Posts: 5871
Joined: 2/19/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TNDommeK
@CD, So you're saying fin dommes can be bought?


As I understand it the majority of people who identify as findomme are actively looking to be bought.

(in reply to TNDommeK)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Dommes and money - 8/12/2014 7:20:12 PM   
seekingOwnertoo


Posts: 1323
Joined: 8/1/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CalentraDomme

Am I the only Domme that feels men asking for things in exchange for money is insulting!!!!!! I know why they do it, but I am not to be bought! Makes Me a little angry that there are so many out there that can be bought, gives us lifestyle Dommes a bad rap.



While I am not a Domme, i can share how i choose a Lady to write to on this sight. And yes, I do try to avoid looking at pictures.


Basically am seeking to find substance in Her profile ... a bit about who She is and what She desires. That sounds kind of generic so what i mean is .. i read profiles looking for things i can relate to .. mentally and emotionally. When i see those, then i write.

So You know, i always avoid profiles that contain the words financial Domme; online only and so on as so forth. As others have pointed out, this web-site has become way overstocked with them in the last few years.

That said, i only find a handful of interesting Ladies here, and go thru a LOT of profiles to find them

When i meet one, i am a gentleman, meet for dinner, pick up the check and all of the common courtesies.

So i truly empathize with Your post .. it must be difficult ... and even when You put You're best foot forward .. then only obtaining a few quality responses.

Just stick with it and someone will find You ... take advantage of the block and delete function in the meantime. Cause there is nothing else i can tell you.








< Message edited by seekingOwnertoo -- 8/12/2014 7:25:09 PM >

_____________________________

Got my second paddle! Finally! :-)

Heck I had one in 2010 .. now in 2013 another! Yes you can say, i am just a gifted slow learner!

(in reply to CalentraDomme)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Dommes and money - 8/12/2014 7:26:00 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:


As a male sub, I am also not to be bought. I completely understand.


Are you sure you've thought that through, Lookie? Me, I wouldn't mind being bought, now and then. The notion gives me a bit of a stiffy, truth to be told.

_____________________________

http://www.domme-chronicles.com


(in reply to LookieNoNookie)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Dommes and money - 8/12/2014 7:58:07 PM   
seekingOwnertoo


Posts: 1323
Joined: 8/1/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:


As a male sub, I am also not to be bought. I completely understand.


Are you sure you've thought that through, Lookie? Me, I wouldn't mind being bought, now and then. The notion gives me a bit of a stiffy, truth to be told.



Would you really? A few years ago ... well about fifteen years, LOL A very rich widow wanted to buy me ...

Hot concept until you consider the sacrifices ...

When confronted with the opportunity ... I found I preferred to pass ...





_____________________________

Got my second paddle! Finally! :-)

Heck I had one in 2010 .. now in 2013 another! Yes you can say, i am just a gifted slow learner!

(in reply to PeonForHer)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Dommes and money - 8/12/2014 10:48:03 PM   
GoddessManko


Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:


As a male sub, I am also not to be bought. I completely understand.


Are you sure you've thought that through, Lookie? Me, I wouldn't mind being bought, now and then. The notion gives me a bit of a stiffy, truth to be told.


According to what I hear, you'd be quite expensive dear.

quote:

Assuming that a woman is a prostitute is typically considered quite insulting.



GotSteel, say it isn't so! Since when?

quote:

Dammit... no one offers me money.

Gauge, it's on my to do list.

_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

(in reply to PeonForHer)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Dommes and money - 8/13/2014 12:43:23 AM   
TNDommeK


Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GotSteel


quote:

ORIGINAL: TNDommeK
@CD, So you're saying fin dommes can be bought?


As I understand it the majority of people who identify as findomme are actively looking to be bought.


So you're saying some, not all.
Ok, glad you made that separation.

_____________________________

Goddess of Duck Lips and Luxurious Hair
The working Fin Domme
Professional con artist, swindler, trixster, extortionist

Our snark-nado needs more cowbell


(in reply to GotSteel)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Dommes and money - 8/13/2014 4:04:18 AM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		Lifestyle Dommes that do get money as gifts, get it from familiar people that have no misunderstanding of the relationship terms and therefore get no complaints.

Only adult sex workers take money from strangers for intimate encounters, BDSM or otherwise . . . and now you're pissed that acting like a hooker has them wanting you to work for it.... imagine how pissed they are that the hooker they paid didn't deliver?

This OP cracks me up.



_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to CalentraDomme)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Dommes and money - 8/13/2014 5:03:32 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingOwnertoo


quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:


As a male sub, I am also not to be bought. I completely understand.


Are you sure you've thought that through, Lookie? Me, I wouldn't mind being bought, now and then. The notion gives me a bit of a stiffy, truth to be told.



Would you really? A few years ago ... well about fifteen years, LOL A very rich widow wanted to buy me ...

Hot concept until you consider the sacrifices ...

When confronted with the opportunity ... I found I preferred to pass ...




Why? Given firm policies of a) always doing your required work in complete darkness and b) your hosing her down regularly and scrubbing vigorously with a stiff brush and strong detergent, couldn't you have stepped up to the mark?

Odd sort of way of making a living, admittedly, but perhaps better than flipping burgers.

Seriously, that's an intriguing comment. Care to tell us more about it?

_____________________________

http://www.domme-chronicles.com


(in reply to seekingOwnertoo)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Dommes and money - 8/13/2014 5:04:52 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

According to what I hear, you'd be quite expensive dear.


You are too kind. Er ... I think.

_____________________________

http://www.domme-chronicles.com


(in reply to GoddessManko)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Dommes and money - 8/13/2014 5:12:32 AM   
MistressRage


Posts: 138
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: Upstate New York
Status: offline 		You make excellent points Cloaked, however, I was not commenting on the Domme's side of things, I was commenting only on where the male might be coming from in his offering of cash. I'm not saying offering cash is always the best idea, but knowing where they're coming from can give us perspective.

You mentioned that a sub having only cash to offer implied he had no submissiveness to offer. I have no doubt that sometimes this is true. But there is sometimes more to it than that.

For example, I know one man who is a single father. He was working about 60 hours per week, and when he wasn't working he was taking care of his kids along with everything that came along with that-picking them up from daycare, cooking, cleaning the house, etc. Any spare time after that was spent visiting his mother who was quite ill. He couldn't fit in a full night's sleep, much less giving up the time a Domme would want from him as a slave.

On the rare occasion that he could muster up some time he would play with a local lifestyle Domme. He offered money as a form of gratitude for her putting up with his hectic schedule and inability to truly serve her. She never asked for it, he offered it. It was his way of making her life easier. Now that things have settled down for him, he has time to truly serve this Domme as her full-time sub. He gives her his time now rather than cash. Last I heard they were getting on quite well and he was thrilled to be able to submit to her completely. You see, the desire to submit was there all along, but sometimes life gets in the way of what we really want to be doing, and concessions must be made.

I think it's important to know WHY he is offering cash before getting offended over said offer.



quote:

ORIGINAL: CloakedProtector

A real natural Domme, traditionally in short a Domme, would NEVER be satisfied with cash being the only thing being offered, she wouldn't be interested in cash in the first place, possibly she'd allow cash as part of a play but not as the goal of the D/s relationship.

And if a sub has only cash to offer it implies he has no submissiveness to offer and wouldn't that be the first thing a Domme would be looking for?



_____________________________

Mistress Rage
~outRAGEous~

I don't always return to a thread. It's usually best to message your replies directly to me.

(in reply to CloakedProtector)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Dommes and money - 8/13/2014 5:40:34 AM   
FieryOpal


Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CloakedProtector

Only the best submissive men will make it to the lifestyle Dommes who due to their natural Domminance have an advantage on FinDommes and ProDommes and have the first choice and the very best submissives.
<snip>
But then again, I think that you know very well that most submissives (as well male as female) are not real lifestyle submissives.

Isn't that the truth, on both counts.

I've heard it said that the more established BDSM providers no longer cater to their (mostly male) clients' DO-ME laundry lists, those who can afford to maintain a select clientèle.
In my guestimation from what I've "overheard" in several years from perhaps 2 dozen *mixed* sources, 2-5% might be the industry average for those who manage to build up a word-of-mouth rep.
This would make the bulk of hired Assertive Female (Service) Tops de facto following their clients' Topping-from-the-bottom scripts.

quote:

ORIGINAL: CloakedProtector
<snip>
And if a sub has only cash to offer it implies he has no submissiveness to offer and wouldn't that be the first thing a Domme would be looking for?

In summary, not only are "real lifestyle submissives" equally as rare as their Domme counterparts, but those kinksters who become accustomed to choosing from a BDSM menu (whom I call "menu sub-bottoms") get conditioned and/or condition themselves to be the antithesis of the very submission that a naturally Dominant woman seeks, values and prizes in an s-type.

_____________________________

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

(in reply to CloakedProtector)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Dommes and money - 8/13/2014 7:13:14 AM   
thompsonx


Posts: 23322
Joined: 10/1/2006
Status: offline
ORIGINAL: CalentraDomme

Thanks for the input. A lifestyler and a finDomme are two different things. I don't think it is a matter of only being with pro Dommes, but a matter of how many Dommes on this site, (as has been stated to Me from many a man on this site), are looking for the money aspect.

To each their own,

You do not seem very accepting of those who play for pay. So much for "to each their own."



but I don't like being hounded after I have told the sub that I am not a fin Domme,

There is a block function for those who cannot read.



in respect to him giving Me money as if every woman has her price.

Everyone has their price male of female.



My price is much higher than money ;)

Which you freely admit here.


(in reply to CalentraDomme)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Dommes and money - 8/13/2014 7:15:46 AM   
thompsonx


Posts: 23322
Joined: 10/1/2006
Status: offline
ORIGINAL: GotSteel

Assuming that a woman is a prostitute is typically considered quite insulting.

Is it insulting to assume that a woman who ask for money for sex is a prostitute?

(in reply to GotSteel)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Dommes and money - 8/13/2014 7:17:04 AM   
thompsonx


Posts: 23322
Joined: 10/1/2006
Status: offline
ORIGINAL: LookieNoNookie

As a male sub, I am also not to be bought.

Roflmfao




(in reply to LookieNoNookie)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Dommes and money - 8/13/2014 7:20:40 AM   
thompsonx


Posts: 23322
Joined: 10/1/2006
Status: offline
ORIGINAL: Gauge

Dammit... no one offers me money.


Perhaps there is a reason for that?

(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Dommes and money - 8/13/2014 7:25:36 AM   
thompsonx


Posts: 23322
Joined: 10/1/2006
Status: offline
ORIGINAL: CloakedProtector

OP, one part of the problem is that there are not so many lifestyle Dommes compared to the demand of submissive men.

The number of submissive men has been grossly exagerated. You are mistaking hng for submissive men.




Only the best submissive men will make it to the lifestyle Dommes who due to their natural Domminance have an advantage on FinDommes and ProDommes and have the first choice and the very best submissives.

Where supply is pretty much equal to demand

The ProDommes have the advantage of usually being well trained, skilled and equipped but mostly operate in the Top/bottom model. Their strength is the non-strings attached, play & go!

Werx for me


That is where married men, business men and the large army of "time window players" end up if they want to be in the submissive role.

You have a firm grasp of the obvious




(in reply to CloakedProtector)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Dommes and money - 8/13/2014 7:29:19 AM   
thompsonx


Posts: 23322
Joined: 10/1/2006
Status: offline 		ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

Lifestyle Dommes that do get money as gifts, get it from familiar people that have no misunderstanding of the relationship terms and therefore get no complaints.

Only adult sex workers take money from strangers for intimate encounters, BDSM or otherwise . . . and now you're pissed that acting like a hooker has them wanting you to work for it.... imagine how pissed they are that the hooker they paid didn't deliver?

This OP cracks me up.

That is the nature of old phoques...been there done that and the number of fresh stories is quite limited.
Your ability to see to the quick of the issue is clear.
Another case of >>hammer>>>nail>>>head>>>dead on target.




< Message edited by thompsonx -- 8/13/2014 7:30:09 AM >

(in reply to ResidentSadist)
Profile   Post #: 40
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Dommes and money Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.109