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RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 1:49:40 PM   
RockaRolla


Posts: 1153
Joined: 1/20/2014
From: South Florida
Status: offline 		I haven't noticed that trend. There are dommes getting dissed, sure, but from my POV they're mostly of the "I'm a new findomme and I'm hot so you worthless pigs better pay me!" types.

(in reply to ExiledTyrant)
Profile   Post #: 141
RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 3:45:09 PM   
GotSteel


Posts: 5871
Joined: 2/19/2008
Status: offline 		Wow, you were prolific yesterday.

Skimming through all that it looks like you've got this sort of shell game of numerous entirely independent topic. I'll try and give a brief response on each one.

1. Not wanting a relationship doesn't make someone a troll. Now if instead we're changing the subject to trolling, then I hope you've reported and blocked the person.

2. Just because you wouldn't get anything out of a hookup doesn't mean theirs nothing to get out of a hookup.

3. Lying to manipulate people is wrong. If you want to raise awareness about that, by all means that seems like a laudable goal. But is that what's going on?

Well you've picked the most likely thing to be inaccurate (height according to okcupid) and completely overgeneralized that to lying in general. Vastly magnified the frequency of lies occurring. And assigning the worst, most nefarious possible motivation for these height inaccuracies when as several people have pointed out there are alternative explanations.

Doesn't that seem suspiciously like bigotry:

quote:

ORIGINAL: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bigotry
Bigotry is a state of mind where a person strongly and unfairly dislikes other people, ideas, etc.


Here let's take one of your statements and change the group being castigated:
quote:

ORIGINAL: F̶i̶e̶r̶y̶O̶p̶a̶l̶
Oh, I also believe those lying-profile stats reflect the majority of s̶t̶a̶g̶ ̶(̶o̶r̶ ̶c̶h̶e̶a̶t̶i̶n̶g̶)̶ ̶m̶e̶n̶'̶s̶ [black people's] basic nature to say whatever line of b.s., or to give whatever impression they can, even make whatever promises they sense are necessary to get what they want from a woman.

Does this now look like the sort of thing you'd only expect to hear from someone wearing a white pillowcase?

4. I know there was more but it's slipping my mind.

(in reply to FieryOpal)
Profile   Post #: 142
RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 3:56:42 PM   
RockaRolla


Posts: 1153
Joined: 1/20/2014
From: South Florida
Status: offline 		Considering FO is a straight woman looking almost exclusively at straight men, it's not ridiculous to suggest that she could draw some conclusions about that demographic based on her experiences.
I certainly wouldn't expect her to offer insight on what gay men, women, etc do on dating sites.

< Message edited by RockaRolla -- 11/23/2014 3:58:25 PM >

(in reply to GotSteel)
Profile   Post #: 143
RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 4:03:59 PM   
shiftyw


Posts: 2837
Joined: 6/6/2013
From: The Shire
Status: offline 		I'm just excited this thread is at 8 pages. Keep up the good work everyone.

(in reply to RockaRolla)
Profile   Post #: 144
RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 4:06:27 PM   
RockaRolla


Posts: 1153
Joined: 1/20/2014
From: South Florida
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: shiftyw

I'm just excited this thread is at 8 pages. Keep up the good work everyone.

How many spankings are you owed now? This one may add to the count.

(in reply to shiftyw)
Profile   Post #: 145
RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 4:07:49 PM   
GotSteel


Posts: 5871
Joined: 2/19/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: HoneyBears
Fiery, have you been seeing a disturbing trend lately?
There must be a full moon.
Not only are there fewer and fewer dommes posting over the past six months, but the ones who do are often getting dissed and harassed lately.

I've seen a number of long standing trends that probably aren't healthy. There are significantly fewer posters around here than there used to be in general. Due to arpig, the shutdown, moderation issues and the opening of kinkytoo.


quote:

ORIGINAL: HoneyBears
It is ironic for this to be instigated by someone who is quick to criticize those of us who remain here on the forum side of collarspace as giving other posters a hard time.

The hazing of new posters by the regulars has been an often noted and commented on quirk of collarchat.

(in reply to HoneyBears)
Profile   Post #: 146
RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 4:16:54 PM   
shiftyw


Posts: 2837
Joined: 6/6/2013
From: The Shire
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RockaRolla


quote:

ORIGINAL: shiftyw

I'm just excited this thread is at 8 pages. Keep up the good work everyone.

How many spankings are you owed now? This one may add to the count.



Its actually a caning, and ET has to catch me first...and it is cold here. I undoubtedly have the upper hand.

RE: GotSteel-

I remain uncertain of why people think this is a collarchat only issue.
Its an internet message board issue.
People get flamed on fet all the time- only its often in groups and in secret. If those don't show up on your friend feed, I would be happy to direct you to them on that site.

Really- I do wish posting would pick back up here. But these responses are responses you're bound to get if you come in waving your boner around anywhere- regardless of hook up culture- which I do agree- this site can be a bit "prudish"- personally. I'm way into casual sex, and feel really like the odd man out here sometimes. But I've never been harassed for it on here really.

But really- if you wanna see hazing- you should see some of the responses on the weight watchers message board. Seriously. Its internet culture, and far from just a collarchat issue.


(in reply to RockaRolla)
Profile   Post #: 147
RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 4:19:53 PM   
smileforme50


Posts: 1623
Joined: 1/24/2013
From: DelaWHERE(?)
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GotSteel


quote:

ORIGINAL: HoneyBears
Fiery, have you been seeing a disturbing trend lately?
There must be a full moon.
Not only are there fewer and fewer dommes posting over the past six months, but the ones who do are often getting dissed and harassed lately.

I've seen a number of long standing trends that probably aren't healthy. There are significantly fewer posters around here than there used to be in general. Due to arpig, the shutdown, moderation issues and the opening of kinkytoo.


quote:

ORIGINAL: HoneyBears
It is ironic for this to be instigated by someone who is quick to criticize those of us who remain here on the forum side of collarspace as giving other posters a hard time.

The hazing of new posters by the regulars has been an often noted and commented on quirk of collarchat.


Wow...I must have really had my head up my ass that week....I don't remember ever getting "hazed". How far back into the archives can I look?

_____________________________

“Give it to me!” she yelled
“I’m so fucking wet! Give it to me now!”

She could scream all she wanted…..I was keeping the umbrella.

(in reply to GotSteel)
Profile   Post #: 148
RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 4:28:30 PM   
RockaRolla


Posts: 1153
Joined: 1/20/2014
From: South Florida
Status: offline 		What many people interpret as "hazing" on a message board is often more of a difference of opinion, and calling OP out on stupid things. My "hazing" on the board was mostly just that.

Seriously, if new posters can't handle people being anything less than ass-kissing nice, they need to stay away from the internet.

(in reply to smileforme50)
Profile   Post #: 149
RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 4:30:12 PM   
GotSteel


Posts: 5871
Joined: 2/19/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RockaRolla
Considering FO is a straight woman looking almost exclusively at straight men, it's not ridiculous to suggest that she could draw some conclusions about that demographic based on her experiences.
I certainly wouldn't expect her to offer insight on what gay men, women, etc do on dating sites.


My thing isn't that she's talking about single [straight] men instead of gay men or lesbians or whatever. It's that she's saying horrible things about the "basic nature" of the majority of a group based on something the majority of said group doesn't do.


(in reply to RockaRolla)
Profile   Post #: 150
RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 4:34:43 PM   
RockaRolla


Posts: 1153
Joined: 1/20/2014
From: South Florida
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GotSteel


quote:

ORIGINAL: RockaRolla
Considering FO is a straight woman looking almost exclusively at straight men, it's not ridiculous to suggest that she could draw some conclusions about that demographic based on her experiences.
I certainly wouldn't expect her to offer insight on what gay men, women, etc do on dating sites.


My thing isn't that she's talking about single [straight] men instead of gay men or lesbians or whatever. It's that she's saying horrible things about the "basic nature" of the majority of a group based on something the majority of said group doesn't do.



Cry discrimination all you want. But based on my own experiences on these sites, and the experiences of other women, I'm not convinced they're in the minority.

(in reply to GotSteel)
Profile   Post #: 151
RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 4:54:35 PM   
wittynamehere


Posts: 759
Joined: 2/5/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FieryOpal
Just so nobody feels left out,
Yep, it's too much to ask a man [fill in the blank]....
Yep, it's too much to ask a transgender [fill in the blank]....

Thanks for including non-women people in this. Equality and all that.
Also, [fill in the blank] appears to mean "any action you can imagine", or "anything". So the point this thread is making is:

Yes, it's too much to ask (anyone) to do (anything).

Fair enough. We should all stop asking for things. Noted.

_____________________________

I almost never return to a thread, so if you saw my post and want me to hear your reply, please message it to me.

(in reply to FieryOpal)
Profile   Post #: 152
RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 5:10:30 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline 		I haven't read the thread, but I saw the last few posts on this page in the scroller, and I'd like to say that the title of the thread is not accurate. I've had encounters with women where she scratched one of my itches and I scratched one of hers, and that was it. I can think of two women in particular who were separated but still married, and all they wanted was a maaaaaaaan who wasn't an asshole to them. One of them hadn't been laid in 4 years, and damn she was hungry, and did whatever I asked with enthusiasm. She was pretty, too, just in an emotional cage for a long time.

So I think the standard dating advice applies here. Instead of complaining on the internet about how nobody wants you, or how (insert gender here) are all jerks, spend your time reading good books, developing a hobby, or going to the gym. Then you'll be more attractive to potential partners.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to wittynamehere)
Profile   Post #: 153
RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 5:14:08 PM   
shiftyw


Posts: 2837
Joined: 6/6/2013
From: The Shire
Status: offline 		I don't think FO was saying no one wants her?


(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 154
RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 5:18:03 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: shiftyw
I don't think FO was saying no one wants her?

Is she attracting the type of person she wants to be wanted by? For men whose inbox has nothing but scammers, and women whose inbox has nothing but do-me's, the answer is probably no.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to shiftyw)
Profile   Post #: 155
RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 5:20:39 PM   
GoddessManko


Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

I haven't read the thread, but I saw the last few posts on this page in the scroller, and I'd like to say that the title of the thread is not accurate. I've had encounters with women where she scratched one of my itches and I scratched one of hers, and that was it. I can think of two women in particular who were separated but still married, and all they wanted was a maaaaaaaan who wasn't an asshole to them. One of them hadn't been laid in 4 years, and damn she was hungry, and did whatever I asked with enthusiasm. She was pretty, too, just in an emotional cage for a long time.

So I think the standard dating advice applies here. Instead of complaining on the internet about how nobody wants you, or how (insert gender here) are all jerks, spend your time reading good books, developing a hobby, or going to the gym. Then you'll be more attractive to potential partners.


That's fine RedMagic1, plenty of women are perfectly fine with fuck buddies. I believe her premise was not to presume we all are. Some of us do want to be romanced, wooed and charmed. Why is asking for that much so outrageous even if it doesn't fit your bill? I'm just saying... Wanting romance with your kink isn't a crime I hope.
ETA, well to be fair, this "lifestyle" does start off sexually in its context, to find someone who will set that aside and show they also value you as an individual has some measure of difficulty. When someone is telling me in an introductory letter with "Gent" in his screenname, "please pimp me out and make me suck as many dicks as possible" before "bowing humbly", I'm not really sure how to respond except to blink and self reflect, LOL.

< Message edited by GoddessManko -- 11/23/2014 5:33:22 PM >

_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 156
RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 5:27:13 PM   
shiftyw


Posts: 2837
Joined: 6/6/2013
From: The Shire
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

quote:

ORIGINAL: shiftyw
I don't think FO was saying no one wants her?

Is she attracting the type of person she wants to be wanted by? For men whose inbox has nothing but scammers, and women whose inbox has nothing but do-me's, the answer is probably no.


My inbox is also full of do me sub males. So...what do you suggest I do?

Plus- do men just want do me sub ladies? I'd argue a good deal of the men on here would say no also...

ALSO FOR THE BENEFIT OF EVERYONE INVOLVED...

This is the thread that started this:
http://www.collarchat.com/m_4749816/tm.htm

< Message edited by shiftyw -- 11/23/2014 5:30:23 PM >

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 157
RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 5:35:22 PM   
GoddessManko


Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline 		Thanks shifty, the replies on that thread are AWESOME.

_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

(in reply to shiftyw)
Profile   Post #: 158
RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 5:48:27 PM   
GoddessManko


Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GotSteel


quote:

ORIGINAL: HoneyBears
Fiery, have you been seeing a disturbing trend lately?
There must be a full moon.
Not only are there fewer and fewer dommes posting over the past six months, but the ones who do are often getting dissed and harassed lately.

I've seen a number of long standing trends that probably aren't healthy. There are significantly fewer posters around here than there used to be in general. Due to arpig, the shutdown, moderation issues and the opening of kinkytoo.

Agreed HoneyBears, I avoid toxic or generally negative behaviors, it's not good to be around that sort of thing too often. I would categorize any form of negativity, especially unwarranted as unhealthy. I'm not used to it and I don't wish to become accustomed to it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: HoneyBears
It is ironic for this to be instigated by someone who is quick to criticize those of us who remain here on the forum side of collarspace as giving other posters a hard time.
quote:


The hazing of new posters by the regulars has been an often noted and commented on quirk of collarchat.

People will come and go and some will remain. I used to see the collarchat as beneficial but currently fence sitting on such an evaluation. It has been around for a long time and I really think some of the drama is part of the appeal. It's not necessarily anything beyond that. I notice opinions sway depending on the posters' stance so generally I take all advice with a grain of salt. There is entertainment value here though and sometimes you might get a bit of wisdom. No matter how frequent or infrequent.
Some posters I respect highly, even when we disagree. FieryOpal is one of them.

< Message edited by GoddessManko -- 11/23/2014 5:49:17 PM >

_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

(in reply to GotSteel)
Profile   Post #: 159
RE: Yep, It's Too Much to Ask a Woman to be Your Fetish... - 11/23/2014 5:58:48 PM   
GotSteel


Posts: 5871
Joined: 2/19/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko
That's fine RedMagic1, plenty of women are perfectly fine with fuck buddies. I believe her premise was not to presume we all are.

Her premise came off like none of you were ok with fuck buddies.

quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko
Some of us do want to be romanced, wooed and charmed. Why is asking for that much so outrageous even if it doesn't fit your bill?

It's not outrageous and those needing it shouldn't settle for less.

(in reply to GoddessManko)
Profile   Post #: 160
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