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RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/1/2016 1:40:48 PM

Wayward5oul

Posts: 3314
Joined: 11/9/2014
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MuscleBoundDom
So what if it's my kink to lecture overweight submissive females?

Because by your own admission, it isn't.

From your profile:
I'm now accepting submissive women who are FIT, STRONG AND INTO BODY BUILDING.

If you drink soda I don't even want to know you.

From another thread where you were complaining about overweight submissives who don't listen to you:
Please, no fatties.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MuscleBoundDom
In any case, I'm a professional fitness instructor and I get paid to lecture and train people. My submissive isn't paying me one thin dime! So by default, I have every right to lecture her. I'm going to have a serious talk with her about checking her cellphone while I'm talking.

You have made several posts on these boards complaining about women who don't listen to you, you don't understand why all the women you meet at munches aren't health conscious and won't listen to you, about how maybe you need to start punching them since they won't listen.

Your posts on other threads that you have started on this exact same topic all use the word 'submissive' a lot to refer to women. While complaining about them not listening to you and not doing as they are told, you also state that they are submissives you met at events, but not necessarily your submissive. You do understand that there is a difference, right?

I ask because you have also stated that your problem isn't lack of female companionship, but lack of quality, despite the fact that 90% of women like you. So after reading many of your posts, I am left wondering just how many of these submissive women are women that you have actually negotiated a dynamic with, and how many of them just aren't listening to you because you have not established a D/s dynamic with them?

In this particular thread, you state that you agreed to be her dom, and had her come to your place. Did this agreement that the two of you negotiated include lecturing and bodybuilding, or did she just think you were going to be her cheerleader/motivator?

Either way, there is a disconnect. Doesn't sound to me like she is that interested in hearing what you have to say. Just add her to the list.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MuscleBoundDom
How rude! She complains that I check my cellphone while she talks but that's different

No, its not.

(in reply to MuscleBoundDom)

Post #: 81

RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/1/2016 2:47:27 PM

JVoV

Posts: 3660
Joined: 3/9/2015
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

quote:

ORIGINAL: JVoV

Do you think there is anything he could say that could possibly be worse than what's going on in her mind?

As understand it, she is looking to him as a personal trainer, dietician, life coach, and sex/kink partner. A sub can only offer control that they've possessed going in. It will be a team effort to gain that control and put it where it belongs, but for now his only option is to seize it himself.

Physical activity is every bit as important as diet, if not moreso. It will take time and effort to get her conditioned to working out daily. Probably longer before she actually enjoys doing it.

But as shallow as you all seem to think he is, MuscleBoundDom apparently sees potential in this girl. So I'd imagine that most of us would find her beautiful just as she is. But if she were happy with the way she is, she never would have agreed to have such a healthnut as her Dom.

Hell yes, eating disorders are not fun and the wrong kind of comments can trigger them easily, I have a slow metabolism due to being hypothyroid, despite it all I don't think my BMI (as in properly measured not the simple height weight ratio) was ever over 22, I'm usually between 16 and 18, which is pretty healthy for a woman, if I go lower I start missing periods, however it's been a struggle for years to not stop eating if somebody makes a stupid comment because I have the typical hour glass figure. During my teenage days and up to my mid 20's I drifted in and out of anorexia and bulemia.

Yelling at somebody and behaving like a bully doesn't help anybody with an eating disorder, lecturing and stripping off even more self-esteem isn't going to motivate her at all.

Apart from that, he's in LA, a town obsessed with fitness, any decent fitness instructor will make a ton of money and not need a 2nd job to pay the bills, if he doesn't make enough in his chosen job, then most likely because he doesn't have the clientel, and if he employs the same methods, I'm not surprised, people pay a lot for somebody who can motivate them, lecturing - not really.

It's good that you know your body. That didn't happen overnight though. Nor did you do it on your own, right?

I enjoy you being open and honest about your personal experiences, and it certainly is something Muscles should consider. But his sub isn't you. Your medical charts likely aren't the same. Her triggers and comfort foods aren't yours.

And I didn't read anything in the OP leaving me to believe that the 'lecture' was in any way a negative onslaught focused on everything that was wrong with his sub. For all we know he was talking about himself. But like learning how much of your dick a sub can swallow before they gag, it's important to learn how much conversation they can tolerate, and how they respond to various topics. In both situations, a different angle may help.

It is always recommended to get checked out by a doctor before starting any weight loss program. But realistically, how many people do that compared with how many start on their New Year's resolutions today?

She has chosen to take this step. To reach out to Muscles for his help in changing her lifestyle completely. There may be barriers that she can't break without medical intervention, but we all know there is no magic pill, and no easy way out. But she does have someone with a vested interest in her now, that can make the process much easier and enjoyable.

Behavior modification is part of many D/s relationships. This is something both parties have agreed to going in, and should not be questioned by any of us.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)

Post #: 82

RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/1/2016 2:57:53 PM

LadyConstanze

Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline

Have you checked out his profile and his other posts? Oddly enough he ALWAYS seems to have problems with women and complaining about them, it always seems to be their fault, so I seriously doubt that he's much different in person.

Actually by checking her phone and not listening to him, she has chosen to give him the finger and I don't blame her one bit.

As for my health issues not being the issues of the sub, you want to look into eating disorders and what causes them. Des tried to explain, but let me put it plain and simple, eating disorders don't come from feeling great about yourself or how you view your body, irrelevant what the health issue is, I'm a freaking maniac when it comes to healthy food or fitness, to the point where it actually might not be so healthy, I overcompensate, my way of dealing with it. Now you let a rank amateur who has no idea about the issues the sub has have a go at her, and you have a disaster in the making.

If we shouldn't question his dynamic, then maybe he shouldn't whinge about that it didn't work. If he puts it out there for us all to see, I think we have a right to comment.

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to JVoV)

Post #: 83

RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/1/2016 3:05:48 PM

JVoV

Posts: 3660
Joined: 3/9/2015
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wayward5oul

quote:

ORIGINAL: MuscleBoundDom
How rude! She complains that I check my cellphone while she talks but that's different

No, its not.

It very well may be. I do agree that the Dominant sets the tone, but there's a huge difference between answering professional messages and checking the score of the Knicks game or sharing a cat video on Facebook.

Yet the submissive serves at their Dominant's pleasure. The dynamic isn't meant to be fair or equal.

I see it as an act of defiance. Petty and vengeful. A minor offense early on, but needs to be corrected because it displeased him. Period.

(in reply to Wayward5oul)

Post #: 84

RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/1/2016 3:08:55 PM

shiftyw

Posts: 2837
Joined: 6/6/2013
From: The Shire
Status: offline

Read his other posts JVoV- while I like you- on this I am having a hard time agreeing.

(in reply to JVoV)

Post #: 85

RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/1/2016 3:25:06 PM

LadyConstanze

Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: JVoV

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wayward5oul

quote:

ORIGINAL: MuscleBoundDom
How rude! She complains that I check my cellphone while she talks but that's different

No, its not.

It very well may be. I do agree that the Dominant sets the tone, but there's a huge difference between answering professional messages and checking the score of the Knicks game or sharing a cat video on Facebook.

Yet the submissive serves at their Dominant's pleasure. The dynamic isn't meant to be fair or equal.

I see it as an act of defiance. Petty and vengeful. A minor offense early on, but needs to be corrected because it displeased him. Period.

The dynamic has to be agreed upon by both, to me that doesn't sound like she's even remotely willing to enter the dynamic at his terms.

Now in a real D/s dynamic the D type would have corrected something that is an offence, complaining "Women Are So Rude These Days" and a full fledged whine about his inability to handle the situation doesn't strike me as an effective or experienced D-type, or one that inspires submission.

Anybody can slap the label dominant on him or herself, but if what they want doesn't work for submissives, they don't have a D/s dynamic, they may want one, but that's a far cry from actually having one.

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to JVoV)

Post #: 86

RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/1/2016 3:36:52 PM

JVoV

Posts: 3660
Joined: 3/9/2015
Status: offline

I've read most of his threads and posts. And seen his profile. I could offer a definite solution to his relationship problems with women, but it may very well break the poor boy.

(in reply to shiftyw)

Post #: 87

RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/1/2016 3:46:41 PM

JVoV

Posts: 3660
Joined: 3/9/2015
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

quote:

ORIGINAL: JVoV

It very well may be. I do agree that the Dominant sets the tone, but there's a huge difference between answering professional messages and checking the score of the Knicks game or sharing a cat video on Facebook.

Yet the submissive serves at their Dominant's pleasure. The dynamic isn't meant to be fair or equal.

I see it as an act of defiance. Petty and vengeful. A minor offense early on, but needs to be corrected because it displeased him. Period.

The dynamic has to be agreed upon by both, to me that doesn't sound like she's even remotely willing to enter the dynamic at his terms.

Now in a real D/s dynamic the D type would have corrected something that is an offence, complaining "Women Are So Rude These Days" and a full fledged whine about his inability to handle the situation doesn't strike me as an effective or experienced D-type, or one that inspires submission.

Anybody can slap the label dominant on him or herself, but if what they want doesn't work for submissives, they don't have a D/s dynamic, they may want one, but that's a far cry from actually having one.

I don't disagree, but that's for him to realize.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)

Post #: 88

RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/1/2016 3:53:44 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wayward5oul

I ask because you have also stated that your problem isn't lack of female companionship, but lack of quality

The OP is in Los Angeles - a massive kink community placed in a city full of models, actresses and performers. Fuck, even the waiters and waitresses are gorgeous. He keeps complaining that ALL of the submissives that he meets are overweight - which can't statistically be true and I can vouch for the fact that there are a lot of fit, healthy and attractive people in the community. So, it's more likely a case that the overweight submissives are the place where he gains traction.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to Wayward5oul)

Post #: 89

RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/1/2016 3:57:53 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: JVoV

Yet the submissive serves at their Dominant's pleasure. The dynamic isn't meant to be fair or equal.

I agree, but a submissive doesn't go into a relationship knowing how to serve their Dominant. (And the OPs relationship is a new relationship and we don't know her experience level)

quote:

I see it as an act of defiance. Petty and vengeful. A minor offense early on, but needs to be corrected because it displeased him. Period.

I see it as a failure of the Dominant. He should make his expectations clear and set his submissive up to succeed - and he didn't. It should have been used as a teachable moment - and he didn't. Instead, all he did was come here to whine and bash ALL women.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to JVoV)

Post #: 90

RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/1/2016 4:10:33 PM

LadyConstanze

Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wayward5oul

I ask because you have also stated that your problem isn't lack of female companionship, but lack of quality

The OP is in Los Angeles - a massive kink community placed in a city full of models, actresses and performers. Fuck, even the waiters and waitresses are gorgeous. He keeps complaining that ALL of the submissives that he meets are overweight - which can't statistically be true and I can vouch for the fact that there are a lot of fit, healthy and attractive people in the community. So, it's more likely a case that the overweight submissives are the place where he gains traction.

Maybe he recruits at the local WalMart?

As for LA, yes absolutely, it's the one place in the world where I willingly get up at 5 am to have an extra hour of working out, because being not in top notch shape there is the equivalent of sparking up a cigarette in a health food joint.

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to OsideGirl)

Post #: 91

RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/1/2016 4:52:59 PM

Wayward5oul

Posts: 3314
Joined: 11/9/2014
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: JVoV

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wayward5oul

quote:

ORIGINAL: MuscleBoundDom
How rude! She complains that I check my cellphone while she talks but that's different

No, its not.

It very well may be. I do agree that the Dominant sets the tone, but there's a huge difference between answering professional messages and checking the score of the Knicks game or sharing a cat video on Facebook.

Agreed. Especially with the bolded part. That's the difference here. He isn't setting the tone, so for them it isn't the same.

I have seen classroom teachers and college professors that command the attention of the room while still being able to check their phone for incoming emails from administration, texts from students regarding something they just said, or for all I know sexting with someone. But they never lose the attention of their students. They know what they are doing and they could pull it off.

On the flip side, I have seen teachers that despite putting everything they have into it, they cannot keep kids attention and cannot stop them from doing distracting things, like checking devices, even if they were standing in front of the room naked and setting their pubes on fire. They can't pull it off.

This dude seems to be of the latter category. This thread is the 3rd or 4th that he has started, every one talking about him trying to teach submissives about fitness and how they never listen.

He doesn't know how to set the tone. He can't pull it off.

quote:

ORIGINAL: JVoV
Yet the submissive serves at their Dominant's pleasure. The dynamic isn't meant to be fair or equal.

Agreed. Unless the dom is milktoast and doesn't know how to maintain control.

quote:

ORIGINAL: JVoV
I see it as an act of defiance. Petty and vengeful. A minor offense early on, but needs to be corrected because it displeased him. Period.

Agreed. And a decent dom would know that. Not come on here like a whiny girl repeatedly crying about how submissive women won't listen to him when all he is trying to do is help them.

Harsh, but this particular OP brings it out. In the past he has come across as an entitled bully. At least when he isn't whining like a three year old girl.

< Message edited by Wayward5oul -- 1/1/2016 4:55:57 PM >

(in reply to JVoV)

Post #: 92

RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/1/2016 4:54:53 PM

Wayward5oul

Posts: 3314
Joined: 11/9/2014
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wayward5oul

I ask because you have also stated that your problem isn't lack of female companionship, but lack of quality

The OP is in Los Angeles - a massive kink community placed in a city full of models, actresses and performers. Fuck, even the waiters and waitresses are gorgeous. He keeps complaining that ALL of the submissives that he meets are overweight - which can't statistically be true and I can vouch for the fact that there are a lot of fit, healthy and attractive people in the community. So, it's more likely a case that the overweight submissives are the place where he gains traction.

Yep. He is in denial about several things.

(in reply to OsideGirl)

Post #: 93

RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/1/2016 10:18:36 PM

JVoV

Posts: 3660
Joined: 3/9/2015
Status: offline

I believe he handled the situation immediately, letting her know that her behavior was unacceptable. He certainly didn't grab his phone to make the thread, making her wait for our sage advice to guide him.

She didn't understand why he had an issue with it. Now she does, hopefully. And he has a viable solution so that the issue can be resolved.

I don't need to pass judgment on Muscles in order to offer advice. I hate being around people that are glued to their phones.

(in reply to Wayward5oul)

Post #: 94

RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/2/2016 5:33:11 AM

RogueCell

Posts: 44
Joined: 1/2/2015
Status: offline

Bloody hell. Some guy with a chip on both perfectly-defined shoulders (very well evidenced in previous threads and comments) starts a thread entitled Women Are So Rude These Days and people seriously wonder why he isn't getting a sympathetic hearing from other women? Self-fulfilling prophecies are a thing you know...

(in reply to JVoV)

Post #: 95

RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/2/2016 2:45:05 PM

Wayward5oul

Posts: 3314
Joined: 11/9/2014
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: JVoV

I believe he handled the situation immediately, letting her know that her behavior was unacceptable. He certainly didn't grab his phone to make the thread, making her wait for our sage advice to guide him.

She didn't understand why he had an issue with it. Now she does, hopefully. And he has a viable solution so that the issue can be resolved.

I am not as sure of that as you are. All he said as far as having addressed it was that she said it was no different than him doing it. He came back in a later post and stated that he was going to have a serious talk with her about it. That tells me that he hasn't handled it. Sound more like he called her out on it, she made excuses and he let it slide. So I doubt she understands anything more now than before.

quote:

I don't need to pass judgment on Muscles in order to offer advice. I hate being around people that are glued to their phones.

And because you haven't passed judgment on him, he would probably listen to you more than anyone else on this board.

Yes, he is getting a lot of flack. Previous interactions with him on the forum have a lot to do with that. But as another poster pointed out, what else do you expect if you come on here and make a negative generalization about women?

That said, I asked questions in my response to him that were sincere-specifically because of things he has said previously.

I asked if he understood the difference between 'a submissive' and 'his submissive' because of references he has made to about submissive women's attitudes when he encounters them at events and they don't listen to him. There are too many domasses and dumbinants out there that think 'submissive' automatically entitles them to dominance over the submissive person. I wonder if that is part of why he is having so many problems with women. Maybe that is something that he needs to consider.

I also asked questions about what has been negotiated between him and this particular submissve woman, and it was a serious question. He has posted in the past about introducing things into a dynamic that had not been negotiated (asking for advice on corporal punishment, because he thought a closed fist would be more effective than yelling-if he was asking for advice about it I interpreted that to mean that it was not something he had previously discussed with a submissive). So I wonder just how clear their arrangement is.

(in reply to JVoV)

Post #: 96

RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/2/2016 2:54:31 PM

LadyConstanze

Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: RogueCell

Bloody hell. Some guy with a chip on both perfectly-defined shoulders (very well evidenced in previous threads and comments) starts a thread entitled Women Are So Rude These Days and people seriously wonder why he isn't getting a sympathetic hearing from other women? Self-fulfilling prophecies are a thing you know...

Word...

And if I would be rude, I possibly would point out that a lot of women aren't attracted to somebody who looked like he raided the 'roid bank and now suffers the typical temper tantrums from being roided. Since I'm not that rude, I'm going to shut up and just say that I prefer guys who look a bit more natural and look how to have a good time and give a girl a good time...

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to RogueCell)

Post #: 97

RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/2/2016 4:34:29 PM

RogueCell

Posts: 44
Joined: 1/2/2015
Status: offline

I'll just settle for saying that I think you look hot. Not into women! Just appreciate ace ones :)

(in reply to LadyConstanze)

Post #: 98

RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/2/2016 4:37:19 PM

RogueCell

Posts: 44
Joined: 1/2/2015
Status: offline

I have been the unfortunate lover of a number of roid monkeys. It's NOT big and it's NOT clever peeps.

(in reply to RogueCell)

Post #: 99

RE: Women Are So Rude These Days - 1/2/2016 4:39:24 PM

LadyConstanze

Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline

They never had much of an appeal, but we could always go and buy shoes together ;)

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to RogueCell)

Post #: 100

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