Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining Page: <<   < prev  3 4 [5] 6 7   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/24/2016 3:16:26 AM   
respectmen


Posts: 2042
Joined: 8/28/2015
Status: offline 		I am not talking about "all women". No, not ALL women only want the top 1 percent but surely on every personals website, there isn't a shortage of women who do fall in that category. There are also plenty of women who fall close to it. 100s of men aren't good enough for them while they are just the woman next door.

Look at it this way, one would think that the people who demand most out of the opposite gender, should be the ones under more judgement on what they have to offer compared to the ones that are expecting less. I think that is perfectly reasonable and logical.

But what I see, its usually men who are expecting less out of the opposite gender and yet being under the most scrutiny with who they are and what they have to offer compared to a woman who claims she has rejected 100s of men.

Anyway, there is always so much more I want to say. The replies to what others say etc. It's all too much in my schedule. I would like to go further on this topic on the weekend.

(in reply to crazyml)
Profile   Post #: 81
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/24/2016 4:16:58 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen
I am not talking about "all women". No, not ALL women only want the top 1 percent but surely on every personals website, there isn't a shortage of women who do fall in that category. There are also plenty of women who fall close to it. 100s of men aren't good enough for them while they are just the woman next door.

See? I'm not really cool with estimates like that. It's impossible for me to know things like what percent of people do anything, so it's just a made up statistic. I don't scout female profiles in general. The closest I get is reading a female profile if she's posted something to the forums, so I have a very small fraction. (Be fair, you probably don't read most male profiles, either.)

quote:

Look at it this way, one would think that the people who demand most out of the opposite gender, should be the ones under more judgement on what they have to offer compared to the ones that are expecting less. I think that is perfectly reasonable and logical.

We have to disagree here. I'm a very firm believer in any person (male or female) getting to have any criteria that they want for potential partners. Even if you think that criteria is too high, you don't get to make that decision. (An opinion is different than a decision.) Good case in point, the OP is very specific about the way he wants a woman to look and her fitness level. So, if he's allowed to have criteria about who he is willing to date, why aren't the women he's contacting allowed to have their standards about who they are willing to meet up with? I can't be the only woman on her side on the screen saying I wouldn't date the OP (if I were single and fifteen years younger) based solely on his attitude.

quote:

But what I see, its usually men who are expecting less out of the opposite gender and yet being under the most scrutiny with who they are and what they have to offer compared to a woman who claims she has rejected 100s of men.

There's an article floating around here that specifically talks about people more likely to be rejected based on their stats in the online dating world compared to meeting people the old fashioned way. Stats being anything that is considered numbers or data. It's related to this bombardment of information that people have on dating sites. If a person says that 40 is their upper age limit, they guy who is 42 doesn't have the same shot based on his statistics than if a women just met him in person somewhere.

quote:

Anyway, there is always so much more I want to say. The replies to what others say etc. It's all too much in my schedule. I would like to go further on this topic on the weekend.

That's cool. I'll throw some stuff out there in the meantime.

You have to keep something in mind. I don't consider myself the 'average' user of this site. I'm not here to "date". In fact, I should be really low in the dating pool because I am not single, not monogamous, I'm middle aged, and I have jeans in the closet that don't fit.

Why do you think that would happen to be?


< Message edited by LadyPact -- 2/24/2016 5:00:09 AM >

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to respectmen)
Profile   Post #: 82
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/24/2016 4:46:53 AM   
Cell


Posts: 409
Status: offline 		Purple?!

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 83
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/24/2016 5:02:42 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Thank you. I *totally* need to be educated.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Cell)
Profile   Post #: 84
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/24/2016 5:41:55 AM   
Cell


Posts: 409
Status: offline 		Lucky... we're a rare bunch us colourful fruit. (Gotta stick togeather ^_^)

< Message edited by Cell -- 2/24/2016 5:42:21 AM >

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 85
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/24/2016 5:53:04 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Wakka, wakka, wakka. Loved the pun.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Cell)
Profile   Post #: 86
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/24/2016 7:37:17 AM   
UllrsIshtar


Posts: 3693
Joined: 7/28/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dreamlady

quote:

ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar
You want to meet me? I'll let you know when I'll be in the local kink club, and you're welcome to show up and come talk to me there.
And if you don't show? I'll be busy playing the rest of the night without missing you for a second...

Although this seems ideal, the main misgiving I have with this is if attraction is not reciprocated -- then you're stuck with a guy who knows where you might be hanging out.
There has been more than once, but thankfully this hasn't happened often, where I met somebody somewhere and then stopped going there anymore or ceased my affiliations because I didn't want to return until and unless I was accompanied by another man in order to discourage unwanted interest.

Just to be on the safe side, I always choose a place I don't frequent regularly, or a part of town (a different city) where I don't usually return.

DreamLady


That's specifically why I like meeting at the club, and not some other place where I'll still have something fun to do if they're a no show.
Our local club is extremely good at managing stuff like that. If they show, and I don't like them, and they refuse to leave me alone after politely being explained that I'm not interested, they would be banned from going. 'No means no' gets enforced with draconian rule, and there are no second chances for people who refuse to get the message. All I'd have to do is inform management, who will then talk to them about leaving me alone, and if they still persist after that, their membership/guest pass would pulled and they'd go on a black list.

There's no other public place where I can guarantee that they'll be prohibited from going to if they turn out to be an annoying clingy stalker-y type who refuse to stop bothering me.

Safety to the car isn't an issue either, considering how the parking lot is set up.

Your mileage may vary in your local club of course.

_____________________________

I can be your whore
I am the dirt you created
I am your sinner
And your whore
But let me tell you something baby
You love me for everything you hate me for

(in reply to dreamlady)
Profile   Post #: 87
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/24/2016 8:06:59 AM   
UllrsIshtar


Posts: 3693
Joined: 7/28/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen

I am not talking about "all women". No, not ALL women only want the top 1 percent but surely on every personals website, there isn't a shortage of women who do fall in that category. There are also plenty of women who fall close to it. 100s of men aren't good enough for them while they are just the woman next door.



Women date 'up'. Though what a woman considers 'up' depends on what she personally values.

'Up' has a different definition for a bohemian-communist-artist type, than for a lawyer-career-woman, than for a Biblical-literalist-Bible-belt woman, than for an outdoor-sporty-survivalist-training woman, than for a geeky-gamer-tech-obsessed woman, than for a model-money-and-status-obsessed-trophy-wife-type woman, because they all value different things.
For some women 'up' means dating the biggest, baddest, most heinous, serial killer they can find, even while he's serving out a life sentence. However, if that's what attracts her, she's not going to settle for some petty thief, she's going to want the top 1% of 'bad boys'.
If you're not that, she's never going to be interested, even if you're objectively (sanely) a much better catch than a serial killer serving out multiple life sentences.

All women look for a man who has higher social standing than they do, in the things they value the most. What they value the most will differ from woman to woman, but all women will want the top 1% of men, in the category of things they value the most.

If you're consistently hitting the issue of finding women who deem you 'not good enough' and who seem to be aiming for the 1% of men in a category you cannot attain, you're looking for women who value precisely those things you are not.
You'll never be able to convince them that you're 'good enough' because you are not who they are looking for.

Once you accept that, and start dating/looking for women who are looking for the things you are good at, you'll find women easily, because you will be in that top 1% of men those women are looking for.

If you're not good at anything, and there isn't a single category in which you excel, you ought to ask yourself why you're going through life not valuing anything enough to be more than mediocre in it.

Why are you being so shallow as to expect women to be interested in you for things you are not, instead of finding a woman who is interested in the things that you are?

Men also like to date 'up' btw. It's just that with men 'up' usually has little to do with social class, economic class, or esoteric value systems (which are the things women fall for) and more to do with looks, and how caring/appreciative/nurturing/loving/sexual she is.



quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen

Look at it this way, one would think that the people who demand most out of the opposite gender, should be the ones under more judgement on what they have to offer compared to the ones that are expecting less. I think that is perfectly reasonable and logical.



Apparently your logic doesn't hold up in the real world. Because most women have no problem finding partners, and apparently you do.

Women are being judged by men, just as much as men are being judged by women. If that wasn't the case, men would settle for marrying/dating any woman at all, instead of having preferences for some women, and not for others.

Apparently a lot of men are judging the women you are attracted to to be acceptable, and fitting of their definition of 'up', and so those women have a lot of choices. Apparently you're a small fish, in a big pond, with a lot of competition that's better than you. Maybe you should change ponds...
Maybe the women you aim for just have more to offer in the category of things men are interested in, than you have to offer in the category of things those women are interested in.
Maybe you should actually evaluate what you have to offer to a woman, and find women who value those things.
Maybe you should actually evaluate what the women you are attracted to want in a man, and figure out why you're not those things, or why you consistently fall for women who value things you are not interested in excelling in.



quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen

But what I see, its usually men who are expecting less out of the opposite gender and yet being under the most scrutiny with who they are and what they have to offer compared to a woman who claims she has rejected 100s of men.



A woman who has rejected 100s of men has 100s of men interested in her to begin with. As such, she can afford to be selective, because she has a lot of options available to her, and can afford to pick the one that suits her the best.
If she only has very very few men interested in her, she couldn't afford to reject 100s, because doing so would leave her lonely.

If you had 100s of women interested in you, you would be equally selective, because you could afford all those who you didn't like as much, to find the one who suited you most.

Apparently you have a lot of sour grapes about the fact that the women you are attracted to are in high demand, and have 100s of suitors already, with you being at the bottom on the scale of things those women are attracted to.

Maybe you should look for different women, with different values, who are looking for the things you are, instead of women who are looking for the things you are not.




< Message edited by UllrsIshtar -- 2/24/2016 8:20:19 AM >

_____________________________

I can be your whore
I am the dirt you created
I am your sinner
And your whore
But let me tell you something baby
You love me for everything you hate me for

(in reply to respectmen)
Profile   Post #: 88
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/24/2016 8:14:34 AM   
Andalusite


Posts: 2492
Joined: 1/25/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen

I am not talking about "all women". No, not ALL women only want the top 1 percent but surely on every personals website, there isn't a shortage of women who do fall in that category. There are also plenty of women who fall close to it. 100s of men aren't good enough for them while they are just the woman next door.

Look at it this way, one would think that the people who demand most out of the opposite gender, should be the ones under more judgement on what they have to offer compared to the ones that are expecting less. I think that is perfectly reasonable and logical.

But what I see, its usually men who are expecting less out of the opposite gender and yet being under the most scrutiny with who they are and what they have to offer compared to a woman who claims she has rejected 100s of men.


Men reject hundreds of women too, they just don't bother to write first because they weren't interested. Men expect just as much from women as women do from men, but they often have different expectations and priorities.

You're the only one bringing up the "1%." Frankly, my new sweetie isn't objectively in the top 1% of guys on the site. He's cute, but not the most decorative guy I've played with or gone on a date with. He's overweight, but working to get more fit. He's not wealthy, but is comfortable financially. His car is about 5 years old and isn't flashy or exotic.

He's in the top 1% for compatibility with me, though! He lives nearby, and our schedules work out so we've been able to see each other all but one day since we've met. He nurtures and protects my little girl side, loves pounces and growls and purrs from my kitty aspect, has tried and enjoyed a bit of switching with me, and we're developing a lovely D/s dynamic! He turns me on like crazy, and every time I think about him I literally squee and smile so hard my face hurts! He's met a couple of my vanilla friends and several of my kinky friends, and they like each other, and he can talk with them without me having to babysit/handhold him if I need to do a volunteer shift or I'm in the restroom or whatever. His parents have invited me over for Easter to meet them, his sister/BIL and nephews. We're really connecting on both the kinky and vanilla aspects of our lives.

We were just talking about this last night indirectly, and he feels strongly that if we'd only met for a short coffee date as we'd initially planned, we wouldn't have clicked nearly as well. I was a bit sick, so had to delay a few days until the weekend. We grabbed coffee quickly, then headed out to a local well-populated park to talk and walk together, and wound up spending about 4 hours together, including lunch afterward.

(in reply to respectmen)
Profile   Post #: 89
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/24/2016 8:35:39 AM   
Andalusite


Posts: 2492
Joined: 1/25/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: longwayhome
I'm not sure but, from other people's posts, I think that the flake ratio goes up significantly if people think that there is a chance of sex/play/kink.

As a consequence, I always make it clear that there is no chance of that at first meeting. Not that I wouldn't or think there's a problem with it, but simply because it puts too much pressure on a first meeting. Funnily enough, it's not what some people expect a bloke to say, despite years of supposed changing gender roles.

As for the OP, I just get the feeling that when you are fishing for something very specific, your chances of catching it are very slim, especially if you give people the impression that, if they are outside your narrow band of attraction, they are not worthy.

I agree! I don't get as much attention as some of the other ladies, but I get loads of compliments on my profile and the people who I do tend to attract are the ones I want to! I've "caught" someone now, and he's caught me right back.

I agree that some women expect men to be up for play/sex/etc. right away and don't expect them to want to get to know each other first, etc.

Even when I've met the criteria of those "specific fishers" they're often so obnoxious in the way the phrase things and treat the women who aren't in their pool that I don't want anything to do with them. That definitely applies to the OP.

quote:

ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar
I've had people flake in club meetings too, but it doesn't bother me when that happens, because I was going to go anyways, and them not showing up doesn't really impact my night in terms of time lost.

I've got the highest flake ratio with male subs. Most of them don't show, regardless in what context I've tried to meet them (much, club, coffee shop, airport, etc).
With female subs, with most I don't get to the point of even scheduling a meeting, but the with the handful of them I have, only 1 has flaked.

With Dominant men I've got a 100% no-flake ratio, as well as with Dominant women, but the later doesn't really count, because I only meet them in the context of a friendship anyways.

That's really interesting, how about switchy men/women, or have you not dated any? I guess it affected me more even though I was at the club, because I was actually waiting for him at first, and then he interrupted me when he did arrive.

(in reply to UllrsIshtar)
Profile   Post #: 90
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/24/2016 10:17:35 AM   
sweetieDA


Posts: 129
Joined: 4/3/2015
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar

Women date 'up'.



This is neither accurate nor possible. Statistically, if 50% of women take the men who are 'above' them then the remaining 50% of women must date the other 50% of men who are 'below' them. Meaning that women date neither up nor down, on average. What's more, women are far more likely to be educated than men these days, at all levels of the education system, so since not all of them will be able to find similarly educated men, a certain percentage must be dating men with less education than them. Therefore it would be more true to say that it is the men who 'date up'.


(in reply to UllrsIshtar)
Profile   Post #: 91
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/24/2016 10:40:30 AM   
UllrsIshtar


Posts: 3693
Joined: 7/28/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetieDA

quote:

ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar

Women date 'up'.



This is neither accurate nor possible. Statistically, if 50% of women take the men who are 'above' them then the remaining 50% of women must date the other 50% of men who are 'below' them. Meaning that women date neither up nor down, on average. What's more, women are far more likely to be educated than men these days, at all levels of the education system, so since not all of them will be able to find similarly educated men, a certain percentage must be dating men with less education than them. Therefore it would be more true to say that it is the men who 'date up'.




You're making it sound like every single woman on the planet is just looking for the richest man, with the best possible job and education, and that money is the only thing women are interested in.
That's simple not the case.

Women don't all have the same criteria. What's 'up' for one woman, is 'down' for another woman. Dividing the population in half and concluding that there simple aren't enough men for every woman to be dating 'up' is saying that every single woman is looking for the exact same thing in a man.

A woman going for bad boys isn't going to consider 'up' the same thing as a gold-digger who's looking for money and prestige. Neither is going to be happy dating the other one's man, but at the same time, neither of them is going to be happy dating a man who has the qualities they're looking for in a lesser extend than they themselves already have.

A bad girl looking for her bad boy isn't going to be happy with a man who's only as bad as she considers herself to be. Likewise a gold-digger looking for money and prestige isn't going to be happy with a man of the same socio-economic status as herself. A career woman looking for a stay at home husband to have kids with isn't going to be happy with a man who's got as much as a career drive as herself, and on the flip side a career woman looking for a career man isn't going to be happy with a man who's not even more career driven than herself is.

Men do the same thing, btw, they just have a different set of qualities they tend to value than women do.

Everybody is always looking for a partner who exceeds themselves in the qualities they value in a partner. It's because we're all looking for somebody to add value to our lives. We look to add value with those things we don't have (enough of).
So everybody is always looking for somebody to add more value in the things they feel they're missing, than what they currently already have.

Everybody dates 'up'.
It's just a matter of figuring out what exactly qualifies as 'up' in that person's life.
Once you figure out what that person considers 'up' you'll see that everybody is trying to date the top 1% of that category (whether they succeed or not is a whole other matter, and depends, among other things on how many people in their top 1% category are looking for the qualities they themselves excel in).

As soon as you see somebody settle for a partner who has lesser of the qualities that they're looking for than they themselves already have, it's a damn sure guarantee that it won't be long before there'll be silent resentment in the relationship, or they'll end up breaking up.

< Message edited by UllrsIshtar -- 2/24/2016 10:41:22 AM >

_____________________________

I can be your whore
I am the dirt you created
I am your sinner
And your whore
But let me tell you something baby
You love me for everything you hate me for

(in reply to sweetieDA)
Profile   Post #: 92
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/24/2016 11:33:23 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar


If she only has very very few men interested in her, she couldn't afford to reject 100s, because doing so would leave her lonely.



Not necessarily.

She would be left alone which is not the same as lonely.

I prefer by far to be alone, than to be lonely with the wrong man.

I was alone for five years after my divorce but I wasn't lonely.




_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to UllrsIshtar)
Profile   Post #: 93
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/24/2016 12:58:32 PM   
UllrsIshtar


Posts: 3693
Joined: 7/28/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP


quote:

ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar


If she only has very very few men interested in her, she couldn't afford to reject 100s, because doing so would leave her lonely.



Not necessarily.

She would be left alone which is not the same as lonely.

I prefer by far to be alone, than to be lonely with the wrong man.

I was alone for five years after my divorce but I wasn't lonely.





Agreed. Poor phrasing on my part. You're right making that distinction. Thanks.

_____________________________

I can be your whore
I am the dirt you created
I am your sinner
And your whore
But let me tell you something baby
You love me for everything you hate me for

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 94
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/24/2016 5:34:26 PM   
AtUrCervix


Posts: 2111
Joined: 1/15/2016
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen

quote:

MBD....chics want a man with a future, a man with a decent rig


Yet, women are hardly or not judged at all for having no future. A man is most likely judged to have no job, a woman is likely not. A man is likely judged to not have a car, a woman is likely not. A man is likely judged to not have his own house, a woman is likely not.

It's always men expected to be offering more than the average standard while there is no expectation on women at all. Women can be jobless, carless, houseless, and still considered worthy.

The dating world these days (in the western world) seems to center around "women's wants" while what men want usually gets laughed at or taken way less seriously.




Bud.....they have tits.

Game over.

(in reply to respectmen)
Profile   Post #: 95
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/24/2016 5:35:41 PM   
AtUrCervix


Posts: 2111
Joined: 1/15/2016
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddySatyr


quote:

ORIGINAL: AtUrCervix

MBD....chics want a man with a future, a man with a decent rig (say, a 1977 Pinto hatchback if they're looking for a swinging time, or wagon if they envision children some day).

Start thinking about the chics needs.....then you'll find chics in abundance.



Damn it! I just sold my '63 Volvo!



Michael


Shit happens man.

It's not how you fuck up....it's all about the recovery.

(in reply to DaddySatyr)
Profile   Post #: 96
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/24/2016 5:37:19 PM   
AtUrCervix


Posts: 2111
Joined: 1/15/2016
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetieDA

quote:

ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar

Women date 'up'.



This is neither accurate nor possible. Statistically, if 50% of women take the men who are 'above' them then the remaining 50% of women must date the other 50% of men who are 'below' them. Meaning that women date neither up nor down, on average. What's more, women are far more likely to be educated than men these days, at all levels of the education system, so since not all of them will be able to find similarly educated men, a certain percentage must be dating men with less education than them. Therefore it would be more true to say that it is the men who 'date up'.




(Nicely done!)

(in reply to sweetieDA)
Profile   Post #: 97
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/24/2016 7:25:12 PM   
ThatDizzyChick


Posts: 5490
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetieDA

quote:

ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar

Women date 'up'.



This is neither accurate nor possible. Statistically, if 50% of women take the men who are 'above' them then the remaining 50% of women must date the other 50% of men who are 'below' them. Meaning that women date neither up nor down, on average. What's more, women are far more likely to be educated than men these days, at all levels of the education system, so since not all of them will be able to find similarly educated men, a certain percentage must be dating men with less education than them. Therefore it would be more true to say that it is the men who 'date up'.



+10

_____________________________

Not your average bimbo.

(in reply to sweetieDA)
Profile   Post #: 98
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/25/2016 2:17:51 AM   
respectmen


Posts: 2042
Joined: 8/28/2015
Status: offline 		There is a lot of things I disagree with in UllrsIshtar's posts but one thing she is dead right about is that many women do generally seek to date up and wont settle for less. Not all!

For example, women are only looking to date up when they aren't offering anything special or above average themselves while only wanting the best men out of the bunch on a website. That is a perfect example of dating up and that is happening everywhere on every fucking dating/personals website.

On these BDSM sites, it's not hard to find some domme fatty on disability pension who thinks she is a winning prize and will only settle for a subby male who is one of the best out of the bunch. Not to mention, them types usually expect men to pay for all their meals while out to support their food habit. Best to let them starve for their own good.

Anyway, I feel sorry for the men who put up with these chauvinistic, narcissistic airheads you see on these sites... just to get some kink happening. One thing that can be generalised about the dommes on these sites is that they are malignant narcissists.

quote:

All women look for a man who has higher social standing than they do, in the things they value the most. What they value the most will differ from woman to woman, but all women will want the top 1% of men, in the category of things they value the most.


Basically, a man can only be just as worthy as the average woman when he is above average. Wow!

Do you truly think someone respects the male gender when they think someone is less worthy simply because they are a male? How about if a man thought women were less worthy than men. Would you consider that he respects women? How about if a white person thought blacks are less worthy people simply because they are black? Would you consider that this particular white person respects black people?

Speaking of entitlement, men get ridiculed for feeling entitled to have sex with the average woman, which is a fair judgement. But thinking you are entitled to only the best out of the bunch when you aren't holding that standard yourself is a far bigger sense of entitlement than a guy feeling entitled to the chick next door. It's pretty much socially acceptable for women to feel entitled to nearly anything from men without being laughed at.

quote:

If you're consistently hitting the issue of finding women who deem you 'not good enough' and who seem to be aiming for the 1% of men in a category you cannot attain, you're looking for women who value precisely those things you are not.
You'll never be able to convince them that you're 'good enough' because you are not who they are looking for.


Nevermind about that, I stay away from women who seem to have a superiority complex over men. I don't want anything to do with a chauvinist bigot. I would prefer to annoy them types rather than please them.

quote:

Men also like to date 'up' btw. It's just that with men 'up' usually has little to do with social class, economic class, or esoteric value systems (which are the things women fall for) and more to do with looks, and how caring/appreciative/nurturing/loving/sexual she is.


I doubt most women would be with a man if they weren't getting something in return. It's very rare to see a not so good looking guy with a model like woman...unless he is super rich.

quote:

Apparently your logic doesn't hold up in the real world. Because most women have no problem finding partners, and apparently you do.


That's my whole point. Women have no problem because there is no heavy scrutiny placed on them on what qualities they have to offer to men in return.

My standpoint is that the people who expect the most out of others should be judged the most on what they are offering themselves. Not the other way around where the people who are expecting the least from others are most judged upon on what they have to offer. Your standpoint seems to be that men are expected to hand women everything on a silver platter, women should get everything for free from men, while men have to pay a price and jump hoops to get anything from women.

That is a seriously unhealthy mindset when having relations with the opposite gender. It's self serving and one sided.

quote:

Apparently a lot of men are judging the women you are attracted to be acceptable, and fitting of their definition of 'up', and so those women have a lot of choices. Apparently you're a small fish, in a big pond, with a lot of competition that's better than you. Maybe you should change ponds...


quote:

Maybe the women you aim for just have more to offer in the category of things men are interested in, than you have to offer in the category of things those women are interested in. Maybe you should actually evaluate what you have to offer to a woman, and find women who value those things. Maybe you should actually evaluate what the women you are attracted to want in a man, and figure out why you're not those things, or why you consistently fall for women who value things you are not interested in excelling in.


Using this same type of logic, it's like men saying women are less worthy in the workplace instead of dating. When women don't like being treated that way, women are told that it's their fault because they have to be better. They have to offer more to the work place than men or else they are going to be penalised with paygaps and glass ceilings.

Plenty of women out there are real cherry pickers when it comes to equality. Ya know, like women would demand equality in the workplace or any other area in life where males appear to be privileged but all the sudden want privileges for themselves (INEQUALITY) when it suits them in other areas in life. Pick and choose pick and choose :P

Oh, here is a good one. Women demand equal numbers in desirable jobs. But when being asked why aren't they also protesting for the less desirable jobs like a sewage worker, their excuse is that the boys club is keeping them out. But isn't that also happening in the desirable jobs? That is why they are taking action towards them desirable jobs? Gotta larf.

Equality to me means equality 24/7 365 days a year in every area of life. You don't get to choose and tough luck if equality is inconvenient for you in some areas.

What we see in this generation is that men are expected to give up all their old privileges while women aren't expected to give up theirs.

Your way of dating comes from the stone ages where women didn't work and men were expected to provide everything. We live in a new world today. Women can have careers and be independent. Many women even aggressively say and rub it in the face of men that they don't need men. So why are women in today's new world wanting a man who has more than the woman? If women can be independent and not need men, why do men still need to be offering more?

Anyway, this is enough typing and looking at the computer screen for the night.

Oh, and here is a picture that goes well with this discussion.

http://40.media.tumblr.com/5c0434005f64df6a29d4b0f4d48547cd/tumblr_mv14ke3mP01sllwz3o1_r1_1280.jpg




< Message edited by respectmen -- 2/25/2016 2:23:32 AM >

(in reply to ThatDizzyChick)
Profile   Post #: 99
RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining - 2/25/2016 8:46:18 AM   
Danemora


Posts: 752
Joined: 10/9/2006
Status: offline 		Have you considered seeking the help of a therapist to get over your intense fear of vaginas and XX chromosomes?

_____________________________

~The artist formerly known as SeekingTrinity on tour as a solo act~

(in reply to respectmen)
Profile   Post #: 100
Page:   <<   < prev  3 4 [5] 6 7   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Women Aren't Trying So They Are Complaining Page: <<   < prev  3 4 [5] 6 7   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.109