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RE: Excuse me. - 8/19/2006 4:21:17 PM   
kyraofMists


Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: WhipTheHip

>  Sad but true.  It's pathetic to know that they'd allow just any random woman to "do them." 

That is true for most masochists whether they be male or female.   Your
silly, self-righteous, hypocritical judgmentalness is what's pathetic.  This
is just another case of YKINMK.    Pot, kettle, black.



That is not true of any masochist I know.  Most of the ones I know are pretty damn picky about who they let top them.  In fact, I don't think I have met one single masochist in person who will let just anybody top them.



_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to WhipTheHip)
Profile   Post #: 61
RE: Excuse me. - 8/19/2006 4:24:00 PM   
gooddogbenji


Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kyraofMists

That is not true of any masochist I know.  Most of the ones I know are pretty damn picky about who they let top them.  In fact, I don't think I have met one single masochist in person who will let just anybody top them.



Ummmmmm.... me?  But only joking, cyber-topping.  Other than that, not a chance.

Yours,


benji

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to kyraofMists)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: Excuse me. - 8/19/2006 5:19:28 PM   
cynthiamarie


Posts: 205
Joined: 3/11/2005
From: Bluefield, WV, USA
Status: offline
quote:

Since even just the strictly scening part of bdsm is still a form of gratification fuck buddy was meant to include play partner. Again i think most posters understood that.
Yes, I've heard others call a scene a form of sex if it's arousing to either partner.  Seems I am having some kinds of fuck buddies after all *red embarrassed face* because I do experience a mild arousal from flogging, paddling, whatever, with some of the people I top.  At other times, I can't explain the feeling, the need and satisfaction that don't feel arousing, but are important nonetheless.  I'll revise what I said for clarification then; I'm scening with some and not sharing any of my orifices with them, and will only share that with one that I have an emotional attachment, some kind of love for them.  Won't do it just to scratch an itch...I have a vibe at home and plenty of batteries.
 
quote:

quote:

Nothing justifies deceit.  Ones who falsely advertise themselves deserve to be left alone...wanking off in solitude. 
 
 
My, my how self-righteous and judgmental!  I know an attorney
who asks opposing witnesses on the stand, if they ever lie. 
Without fail the witness replies that they always tell the truth.
The attorney looks at jury, shakes his head back and forth and
says, well it looks like I just caught this witness in their first lie.
Anyone who tells you they don't lie is a big fat liar.  And the
sadest liars are those who lie to themselves, and refuse to
admit they ever tell a lie. 
 
"Nothing justifies deceit"?????  Not even lying to a terrorist
to get them to admit where they planted a bomb?  Not even
to get out of a traffic ticket?  Not even to get on a flight so
as not to miss an opportunity of a lifetime?  Not even to
protect a loved?   Not even to preserve your job?  You've
never told your boss a lie?  You never told a customer a
lie? Give me a fucking break!  You just pegged my
hypocrsiy meter. 
  
 
Take things within the context they were said. 
 
Someone who wants to top or bottom, like an occasional one night stand BDSM style, with or without vanilla sex, needs to be honest about their needs.  If they lie to get what they want...they are USING the other person, not entering into a relationship that requires the deepest trust.
 
As for the other things you chose to take out of context...yes, I've lied in the past.  I think the first time was when I was 6, and I got caught.  I was living in a group home that year and because someone tried to teach me morals, bless them, I missed out on going on some coveted field trip as punishment.  I like to think I've grown up since then and am not afraid of taking responsibility for my own actions, as well as the consequences. 
 
Some of us find ways to say things without needing to lie, and no, I've never misrepresented myself to catch the interest of a potential partner, never lied to a policeman to get out of a ticket, etc.  Would I do everything in my power to protect a child, or my own child or family from a violent attack?  Yes, but that could hardly compare with self serving lies that are intended to use or harm another person, or to escape responsibility for one's own actions.  People who try very hard to avoid telling even social lies don't have to keep track of them all.  It's not a matter of putting on holier than though airs, but a choice of how I choose to live my life so that I don't feel bad when I look at myself in the mirror each day.  I need transparency and honor to function, and choose my situations and friends accordingly. 

We were on the subject of BDSM when I said that nothing justifies deceit.  We're NOT talking about saving the world or saving lives, but about lies from people within the community over BDSM related wants/needs.  Let's try to keep this in context.

  
quote:

quote:

Then if I were a male who wanted sex more than anything 
else, I'd learn how to satisfy women's emotional needs
 
 
So it is okay for a female to want sex without strings,
it is okay for a female masochist to want a male to top
her without sex, but if a male is looking for the same
thing, it is wrong, and you get all huffy about it?  Can
you spell    s . . . e . . . x . . . i . . . s . . . t  ?

If a female wants sex without strings, or to bottom for someone with no strings, I would expect her to be honest about her needs.  Why deceive anyone when there would be so many eager takers? 
 
I've accepted men who asked to bottom for me, and there were no chocolates and flowers or begging to be mine about it.  They were honest, got their needs met, and I don't think any less of them.  Even for those who think they want to be a submissive for me but then decide to be an occasional bottom, as long as they are honest about it I can accept it and decide for myself if I want to top them.  It's not the wants/needs of some males and females that cause problems, but the lies. 
 
You don't have the ability to make me get huffy.   And yes, I can spell sexist, but as I don't feel superior to men it doesn't apply to me. 
 
So, you're a Dom who is a masochist and likes to bottom sometimes. *shrugs* I've met many like you.  Maybe since you are so open about your own needs, you can't see the aggravation others cause by wasting our time with deceptions.  If someone is having problems in their search for another addition to their Owners' household, why compare apples and oranges?  They're not looking for a friendly no strings bottom or they would advertise for one; these bottoms shouldn't be masquerading as slaves and wasting their time. 
 
Sorry things seem to be so unfair to men.  One would think that since men don't have to get married to get laid, or go to the local prostitute, that things would be so much easier for them than it was for their forefathers.  
 
IMHO, before we get what we want in a relationship, we are responsible for taking care of our own sexual tension...men have two hands, women have their vibes.   I will not tolerate someone frottering me in chat while pretending to want a long term relationship. 
 
If someone needs to bottom without offering submission, then they need to get their butts to a dungeon and volunteer to bend over for someone...or ask a Dom/me they meet online if they're interested in topping them r/t.  No whining, no deceit.

(in reply to WhipTheHip)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: Excuse me. - 8/19/2006 5:22:16 PM   
WhipTheHip


Posts: 1004
Joined: 7/31/2006
Status: offline 		> If you did not misread the original post why it is you didn't pick up on the
> fact that twice is not a Domme, but rather is a slave.
 
I did.  But she seemed to be speaking as a representative for her Domme,
giving the point of view of her Domme.  I am thinking of them as a unit.
It is my mistake for not making myself clear. I was just trying to save
words.  She might be a slave, but she seems to be filling in for her
Domme. 
 
> And in addition, twice was not talking about those who are looking for
> casual play and are honest about it, but rather about those that say
> they want a relationship but are really only looking for a casual encounter.
> It was the dishonesty she was addressing, not the desire for casual play.

I realized this, but claiming these dishonest people are just looking for
fuckbuddies is not true.  I hate to be defending dishonest people, but
let's not make them worse than they are.   These dishonest people
thought they could satisfy the fantasy of the Domme they emailed.
They were not looking for fuckbuddies, they were not looking for
sexual intercourse, they were looking to offer their bodies to be used
by a sadistic top.  They thought they were offering something of value,
when in reality, they were not, since few if any female Dommes get off
on whipping a male human target, any male human target.  Most sadistic
male tops get off on whipping a female human target, any female human
target.  These guys just can't understannd why female Dommes don't
get off on the same thing they would get off on if they were a top. 
 
It turns out that female Dommes don't really get pleasure from
inflicting pain, but giving pleasure through pain.  Dommes think they
are doing their subs a favor by flogging them.  Whereas most subs
think they are doing their Domme a favor by giving their Dommes 
a male target to whip.  If male subs knew their Dommes did not
get off on inflicting pain, they'd soon lose interest.  Dommes, of
course, have to maintain the illusion that they are really doing
something they enjoy, otherwise male subs would lose interest
in them. And Dommes probably do enjoy giving pleasure through
pain.

If Dommes really got off on inflicting pain, they would rather top
someone they dislike, than someone they like or love.  Why would
a Domme want to give someone she really likes or loves, pain?
The only explanation I can think of is she knows the sub 
experiences the pain as pleasure.  In which case, she knows
she is really giving pleasure and is really out to please the sub. 
 
If you are really a sadist who gets pleasure from inflicting
pain not pleasure, it makes more sense to inflict pain on someone
you don't love or like.  I don't know about you, but I would rather
hurt someone I dislike, than someone I like or love.  Dommes just
look at pain as another kind of pleasure, and so when they top
someone their ultimate goal is really giving pleasure not real pain.
 
This is why professional Dommes are not really sadists because
they are catering to their clients, giving their clients what their clients 
really want, not what they want.  Dommes would not stop when
they do, if they were out for their own pleasure.
. 
If you stop whipping when you think a sub is satisfied, then
you are not a sadist.  Maybe, I'm wrong.  Maybe, I'm not looking
at this right, but this is how it looks to me.  

(in reply to heartfeltsub)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: UNICORN HUNT. - 8/19/2006 5:28:56 PM   
WhipTheHip


Posts: 1004
Joined: 7/31/2006
Status: offline 		> And yet you have NO comeback to the point that a majority of the presenters
> who teach BDSM across the US are femdoms who clearly don't fit your bill. 
> Is there a reason for that?

Huh??? I must have missed this question the first time around.  And now I don't
understand it.  What are you asking?   This sounds like a non-sequitur to me.
What does this have to do with the subject at hand.  All I know is it sounds to
me like you are saying Professional Dommes are just looking for fuck buddies.

(in reply to MisPandora)
Profile   Post #: 65
RE: Excuse me. - 8/19/2006 5:31:49 PM   
WhipTheHip


Posts: 1004
Joined: 7/31/2006
Status: offline 		> That is not true of any masochist I know.  Most of the ones I know
> are pretty damn picky about who they let top them.  In fact, I don't
> think I have met one single masochist in person who will let just
> anybody top them.

Their only concern is that the top be competent with the tools
of the trade, and not exceed their hard limits.  If you read the
other thread I started, you will see this is the case.

(in reply to kyraofMists)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: UNICORN HUNT. - 8/19/2006 5:37:03 PM   
WhipTheHip


Posts: 1004
Joined: 7/31/2006
Status: offline 		> And yet you have NO comeback to the point that a
> majority of the presenters who teach BDSM across
> the US are femdoms who clearly don't fit your bill. 
> Is there a reason for that?

If  I understand you correctly, all these presenters are
just fuckbuddies since they demonstrate on subs
with whom they are not in a 24/7 relationship.
 
At Club Kink in Fort Lauderdale, all the presenters
are male Doms.  I never heard of femdoms teaching
BDSM.  I have no idea what you are talking about.
And even if this were true, I don't see its relevance.
I don't know what you mean when you say, "FemDoms
don't fit my bill"?  I have no idea what you mean.
 

(in reply to MisPandora)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: UNICORN HUNT. - 8/19/2006 5:45:21 PM   
twicehappy


Posts: 2706
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline 		To Mistoferin i say thank you, you always have my back.

To Benji, for a drooling mangy pup(notice i did not say one nice thing)you have a great bite and a greater bark.

To Sinery what you say is true and we do go to events and belong to the local munch but we also live in a very small towm and the fact is you can find your other on cm, all in this house found each other online, Scooter and Jewel 4 years ago and me aalmost a year ago.

To Kyra, Benji, Erin and all the others i agree i will not let just any one top me, it has to someone in particular, some one i care for or love.

To Cynthiam, MisP, Heartfelt and Truesub your posts were all well thought out and made better sense of the points i was attempting to convey.

So shall we all start a new club? FUCKHEADS for  BDSM?

I have yet to answer our friend because i almost set a bomb off earlier this morning that would have made Hiroshima look like a fart in a hot tub. But i shall be in a day or so. For tonight i am returning to the party for our oldest grandson(step but not in our hearts)who goes back to college in thre morning. Marguerita's everybody?

[Mod Note:  edited to remove TOS violation]

< Message edited by ModeratorEleven -- 8/19/2006 6:40:42 PM >

_____________________________

Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations.

The human heart is not a finite container but an ever expanding universe with all the stars contained there in.

(in reply to twicehappy)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: Excuse me. - 8/19/2006 5:55:27 PM   
cynthiamarie


Posts: 205
Joined: 3/11/2005
From: Bluefield, WV, USA
Status: offline
quote:

Why would a Domme want to give someone she really likes or loves, pain?
 
Because we like the sound of the impact of floggers or paddles on their skin?
 
Because the marks look beautiful...leaving our mark can provoke passionate thoughts
 
The heat rising up off the skin is nice to touch and absorb?
 
Because the flinching is almost hypnotic?
 
The changed breathing is like music?
 
Because that drugged look of subspace really gets to me?
 
Because if he cares for me and wants to give something of himself to me, it becomes a spiritual thing, not just a generic topping/bottoming scene.
 
With someone I care for, when I left welts on him from upper back to almost his knees, I felt much more bonded with him.  We both felt pride in his marks and were rueful when they disappeared 3 or 4 days later.
 
Most Doms I've chatted with seem to be more erotic sadists than sadists in the original meaning of the word.  Marquise de Sade or however you spell his name did not believe in hard limits.  I don't believe it's only a woman's perogative to enjoy having the sub experience some arousal during pain play.  If punishments were given in pain, I don't see why Dom or Domme would want to make it arousing for the sub.  It would defeat the purpose and turn it into something of a reward instead.
 
Your experience has mostly been around Pro-Dommes.  Maybe there is a difference in how they feel about their clients compared with how the rest of us feel. 
 
There's a vast difference in headspace for me, depending on if I'm topping someone for fun, or if I'm with a sub who I feel is mine, or will be mine. 

(in reply to WhipTheHip)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: Excuse me. - 8/19/2006 6:07:41 PM   
justheather


Posts: 1532
Joined: 10/4/2005
Status: offline


quote:

Why would a Domme want to give someone she really likes or loves, pain?

Because some people really really like the way an endorphin rush feels.
Because for some people, the infliction/acceptance of pain is an exercise in trust, a way of bonding, and a shared spiritual exploration.
Because for some people, the giving over of oneself/taking of another in such a manner is a form of lovemaking.
Because some people see both intrinsic value and opportunity for exploration of value(s) on several different levels in the giving and receiving of pain.


_____________________________

I want the scissors to be sharp
And the table perfectly level
When you cut me out of my life
And paste me in that book you always carry.
-Billy Collins

(in reply to cynthiamarie)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: Excuse me. - 8/19/2006 6:13:45 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: WhipTheHip

> That is not true of any masochist I know.  Most of the ones I know
> are pretty damn picky about who they let top them.  In fact, I don't
> think I have met one single masochist in person who will let just
> anybody top them.

Their only concern is that the top be competent with the tools
of the trade, and not exceed their hard limits.  If you read the
other thread I started, you will see this is the case.


You do not seem to understand the word masochist, which is someone that takes pleasure in pain, usually, not always, of a sexual nature. I am a masochist. Sex, orgasms, love, and affection all score higher in my hierarchy of needs than does being beaten. I know how to get endorphins other ways. I love being sexually tortured, by someone  I care for and have respect for... makes me feel safe. I think you have mistaken your needs and wants from other people's.. which is a common enough mistake.

< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 8/19/2006 6:14:26 PM >

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to WhipTheHip)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: Excuse me. - 8/19/2006 6:45:08 PM   
WhipTheHip


Posts: 1004
Joined: 7/31/2006
Status: offline 		>  Someone who wants to top or bottom, like an occasional one night
> stand BDSM style, with or without vanilla sex, needs to be honest
> about their needs. 
 
Honesty is generally a good idea.   That's like saying men should
never lie to get their sexual needs taken care of.  The n they'd all be
like me, and that is not something I would recommend to any male.
The nice guy says, I haven't known you long enough to fall in love
with you, sometimes you have to give love a little time.  And some
creep who hardly know the girl tells her, "I love you baby, I love
you baby, and the girls fall into his arms, and allows him to use
and abuse them, even though he doesn't really give a damn about
her."  
 
> If they lie to get what they want...they are USING the other
> person, not entering into a relationship that requires the
> deepest trust. 
 
You don't say.  If every male and female always told the truth
the world would be a perfect place, right?
 
 I'm going to tell you something.  Most females can 't take
the truth.  If guys always told woment the truth, the human race
would become extinct.   If truth sold things Madison Avenue
would tell the truth.   Liars have a major genetic advantage,
but this is not really the issue we've been discussing. 
I never argued it was okay for guys to lie.  I just said
that bottoms contacting Dommes are not just looking
to get laid or looking for a fuckbuddy.  That is a gross
mischaracterizationn.  Now, you've changed the subject.

> I've lied in the past.  I think the first time was when I
> was 6, and I got caught. 
 
<Rolling eyes> I can't believe you are trying to doing this to me!
You are trying to tell me you haven't lied since you were six.
Maybe you think I'm six.

> Some of us find ways to say things without needing to lie
 
In other words, you are good at telling half-truths.  You're name
would be Bill Clinton, would it?   It all depends on what the meaning
of the word "is" is? Right?   Are you trying to be a comediane?
You know I'm not Jay Leno, right?  You are not going to get
a shot on the Tonight Show with this routine.
 
> and no, I've never misrepresented myself to catch
> the interest of a potential partner, never lied to a
> policeman to get out of a ticket, etc. 
 
My eyeballs are about to roll out of their sockets.  
You are soon going to have a lawsuit on your hands
for causing my eyeballs to pop out.   This is torture.
Please stop!!!   You've hit a hard limit!!!! RED!!!!  RED!!!

>  People who try very hard to avoid telling even
> social lies don't have to keep track of them all. 
> It's not a matter of putting on holier than though
> airs
 
This is a classic!!!  I have to save this for posterity.

> but a choice of how I choose to live my life so that
> I don't feel bad when I look at myself in the mirror
> each day.  I need transparency and honor to function,
> and choose my situations and friends accordingly.
 
I'm speechless. 
 
 
> We were on the subject of BDSM when I said that
> ****NOTHING**** [emphasis mine] justifies deceit. 
> We're NOT talking about saving the world or saving
> lives, but about lies from people within the community
> over BDSM related wants/needs.  Let's try to keep
> this in context.

 ****NOTHING**** [emphasis mine] justifies deceit.  I
see when you wrote ****NOTHING****  justifies deceit
you really didn't mean "nothing," you just meant 
BDSM related issues don't justify deceit.   Well, I
have to say this has been a very educational discussion
for me.    Out of politeness, I am not going to say what
I really think. 

< Message edited by WhipTheHip -- 8/19/2006 6:46:41 PM >

(in reply to cynthiamarie)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: Excuse me. - 8/19/2006 7:02:01 PM   
kyraofMists


Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kyraofMists

quote:

ORIGINAL: WhipTheHip

>  Sad but true.  It's pathetic to know that they'd allow just any random woman to "do them." 

That is true for most masochists whether they be male or female.   Your
silly, self-righteous, hypocritical judgmentalness is what's pathetic.  This
is just another case of YKINMK.    Pot, kettle, black.



That is not true of any masochist I know.  Most of the ones I know are pretty damn picky about who they let top them.  In fact, I don't think I have met one single masochist in person who will let just anybody top them.




Above is the full quote from my earlier post and then here is your response to that post:

quote:

ORIGINAL: WhipTheHip
Their only concern is that the top be competent with the tools
of the trade, and not exceed their hard limits.  If you read the
other thread I started, you will see this is the case.

 
So which is it Whip?  Will a masochist let any random top do them or do they actually have some criteria for choosing a top? 
 
Knight's kyra


_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to kyraofMists)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: Excuse me. - 8/19/2006 7:40:01 PM   
heartfeltsub


Posts: 1641
Joined: 11/5/2004
Status: offline
quote:

I suspect most female Dommes really have zero interest
in bdsm.  I suspect most Dommes are just into D/s, and
most Pro Dommes just do it for the money.  I believe this
is true because I am friends with the female owner of a
very large Dominatrix business, and once had my own
Dominatrix business.   Because I am a switch.  And
because I have talked to a lot of Dommes. 


It is my impression that this experience has in fact skewed your perception of both Dommes who are not Pro Dommes and also bottoms. For those who are going to a Pro, then yes what they are looking for is skill in giving them what they need, the service that they are paying for. But for those of us who either Top or bottom not as a service, there are different criteria that we are looking for.

Oh those males that i have talked with who bottom, the complaint that i have heard most often, is that unless the Domme is a pro, she is looking for a relationship and wants to have some connection to the person or persons that she is topping, which leaves the male bottoms with going to a Pro if they want the sensations that a Top can give them without forming a long term relationship.

And as Kyra and others have already said, i don't know a bottom who is not picky about who Tops them.



(in reply to kyraofMists)
Profile   Post #: 74
RE: Excuse me. - 8/19/2006 8:28:02 PM   
cynthiamarie


Posts: 205
Joined: 3/11/2005
From: Bluefield, WV, USA
Status: offline 		  I'm enjoying this.

quote:

quote:

I've lied in the past.  I think the first time was when I  was 6, and I got caught.
  
 
<Rolling eyes> I can't believe you are trying to doing this to me!
You are trying to tell me you haven't lied since you were six.
Maybe you think I'm six.

No, I meant exactly what I wrote.  Did you misunderstand the use of the word "first" and confuse it with the word "last"?  What is so difficult to understand about making a lifestyle choice abot telling the truth?
 
quote:

In other words, you are good at telling half-truths.  You're name would be Bill Clinton, would it?
No.  It's sometimes a matter of seeing the glass as half full instead of half empty.  I can appreciate parts of things without condemning the entire thing...for instance, guys with small dicks are easier to give blow jobs to.
 
I don't need a shot at any tv show, this is not a routine but a lifestyle...and...I haven't had regular tv for the past 13 years, only DVDs and VHS, so I'm really far behind on the comedy routines and talk shows you referred to. 
 
quote:

The nice guy says, I haven't known you long enough to fall in love with you, sometimes you have to give love a little time.
Mm, that sounds workable.  Might even have sex with a guy like that...wait a minute, I HAVE had sex with **or have wanted to have sex with** guys who said something like that.  
 
quote:

And some creep who hardly know the girl tells her, "I love you baby, I love you baby, and the girls fall into his arms, and allows him to use and abuse them, even though he doesn't really give a damn about her."

I've never stayed with someone who did this to me, because how someone treats me tells me about their feelings for me.  I've had vanilla girlfriends who were with men that beat them up, and no, I couldn't get them to leave.  I guess you're right on this, lying and misrepresenting themselves CAN get someone a one night stand or a fling, but it wouldn't be a stable basis for an LTR. 
 
quote:

That's like saying men should never lie to get their sexual needs taken care of.

They shouldn't.  That doesn't mean I'm naieve enough to think that many don't; the ones I catch lying I walk away from.  I grew up in a home full of lies, and spent a few times in my life where lies were a necessity, I simply don't want any of that around me at all anymore and I made my choice.  I would rather be alone that be with someone who lies to me.  I'm not that desperate.
 
quote:

quote:

and no, I've never misrepresented myself to catch  the interest of a potential partner, never lied to a policeman to get out of a ticket, etc.
  
 
My eyeballs are about to roll out of their sockets.  You are soon going to have a lawsuit on your hands for causing my eyeballs to pop out.   This is torture.  Please stop!!!   You've hit a hard limit!!!! RED!!!!  RED!!!

 
*Hands someone an Academy Award, lol* 
 
If someone is to love me, or hate me, I want it to be for who I am and I have never misrepresented myself while dating, or to get someone to ask me out.  If someone hasn't been interested in me and I'm crushing on him, and I can't catch his interest, then I've walked away. 
 
Personal life experiences change people, and help them to set new standards for themselves.  As an example, I was with someone for 3 years, my first boyfriend, and he would never voluntarily say he loved me.  I had to corner him each time, and you know what?  The reason why it was so hard for him to say was because he didn't love me but I was sexually convenient to keep in his life.  Because I was wasting my time with him, I missed out on the chance of finding what I needed with someone else.  And yes, he misrepresented himself.  Lied like crazy over his age, promised to marry me, and let me have a baby.  When I got pregnant, he said it wasn't his.  Small lies, like age, can lead to bigger lies.  I judge men on their honesty in dealing with me, and expect them to do the same with me.  Just one of my own personal hangups.
 
I've never lied to policemen, and I've only gotten two moving violations in my life, both for speeding by accident or to keep up with traffic.  Apologising and telling the truth did not get me out of fines.  If I had read books on how to talk my way out of a ticket, and if my honor would have allowed it, my autistic kid would have said the truth.  He has no guile.
 
By the way, I have attention deficit, and yes, I'm also blonde...and yes, it's better for me not to try to keep track of a huge tangled web of lies.  Been there, done that and never want to go back. 
 
I've had my honor code in effect for the past 17 years and it's my own, the rest of the world can do as it pleases. 

< Message edited by cynthiamarie -- 8/19/2006 8:33:53 PM >

(in reply to WhipTheHip)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: UNICORN HUNT. - 8/19/2006 8:43:00 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: WhipTheHip

At Club Kink in Fort Lauderdale, all the presenters
are male Doms. 


mmmmmmm this is interesting...... just so happens I have been to Club Kink  ... been there a few times....

and it just so happens that I was there when a presentation was being done included a Femdom. 

Now... I wonder... is club kink the only community experience you have?  If it is.... well it explains alot of your limited view points.  Lets just say that Club Kink is not a singular group to judge all groups on.  It has it's strengths... but it does have it's weaknesses as well.

< Message edited by KnightofMists -- 8/19/2006 8:44:36 PM >

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to WhipTheHip)
Profile   Post #: 76
RE: Excuse me. - 8/19/2006 8:43:33 PM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cynthiamarie

One would think that since men don't have to get married to get laid



My own empirical studies have determined that the quickest way to completely obliterate my hope of ever having sex with a woman was to marry her.

Not sure what it means, but there ya go.

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle


(in reply to cynthiamarie)
Profile   Post #: 77
RE: Excuse me. - 8/19/2006 8:57:15 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline 		I have ask, what happened to the guy, who in one of his first posts said he does not judge...and who states the following in his profile?

I am super empathic, compassionate, understanding, comforting, patient, and loving.
 
and

I am trying to start a new religion.  It worships: loving-kindness, empathy, altruism.  It requires lifelong dedication to helping people, lessening human suffering, and treating fellow members like family.

In reading these latest posts, I am baffled by the contradictions.  I normally do not point out stuff like this, but this is really perplexing to see such conflicting sides to the same person.

(in reply to WhipTheHip)
Profile   Post #: 78
RE: Excuse me. - 8/19/2006 9:26:20 PM   
MzMinx


Posts: 277
Joined: 12/26/2005
Status: offline 		 
Micheal  ..... normaly i dont bother ... but this really did annoy me .. and more so after I read your profile
 
aside from the fact your profile reads like a text book case of  wanting to build a very unhealthy co dependant relationship .......  you  trip yourself up by saying you seek a loving relationship that includes flogging .. but on here say if you,
and I quote "I don't know about you, but I would rather hurt someone I dislike, than someone I like or love"  so by your own definition  how could you desire to love but flog  someone?
 
I am a sexual sadistic dominant  ... ohhh and female... I enjoy pain, pleasure and control .... and I enjoy determing the amounts of each
  I dont just   pander to a subbmisives desires
"It turns out that female Dommes don't really get pleasure from
inflicting pain, but giving pleasure through pain.  Dommes think they
are doing their subs a favor by flogging them.  Whereas most subs
think they are doing their Domme a favor by giving their Dommes 
a male target to whip.  If male subs knew their Dommes did not
get off on inflicting pain, they'd soon lose interest"
How could you know what I as  female Dominant  enjoy .... or  why I do what I do
 
I agree with you online most males appear to have no clue how to attract a female .. dominant or submissive ... they assume that females work the same as they do ... even with all the evidence to the contrary
 
I for one hurt those I enjoy ... because I enjoy the complete range of emotions and reactions  it can draw forth .... I dont stop when they are satisfied... I stop when I am satisfied  which includes taking into acount their limits ...
 
Why  would I  want to indulge such intimate and yummy things with someone I dislike ....  why would I want their energy any where near me
 
You are showing your ignorance  of the concepts behind  the term sadism within BDSM  and  the broader  english term.. as well as your ignorance in many things in general but I can only respond to such a  small amount within such a large amount of crap ..

Mostly because I would hate anyone to start believing  sexual sadism has anything to do with dislike/hate or abuse ... 


Indeed needing to  dislike or hate the person ... would be to me an indicater of abuse  .... but as you say in your profile .... you seek the abused ... so maybe you can only see abuse as the way to interact
 
 
and  btw  *laughs*  I am not a  profesional dominant ... but many profesionals enjoy their jobs ... its why the choose to do it ... so yes they have different  rules with paying clients ... but dont assume that  they do not often enjoy it .... 
 
 
Do you assume all  these  ideas ofr yours hold true for male dominants? .. or is it only us woman who have so little clue? is that why we need to be saved by your new religion?
 
You are  digging a hole for yourself that you are filling with yourself and your gross generalisations and silly  nonsense and showing how ignorant, passive aggressive you are .....  Which is a good thing .. at least on here you are flying  your red flags high and wide for all to see ....

(in reply to WhipTheHip)
Profile   Post #: 79
RE: UNICORN HUNT. - 8/19/2006 9:32:19 PM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy

To Siner[g]y what you say is true and we do go to events and belong to the local munch but we also live in a very small towm and the fact is you can find your other on cm, all in this house found each other online, Scooter and Jewel 4 years ago and me aalmost a year ago.



I hope I did not imply with my note that finding people on-line is impossible.  I meant merely to state that if approach A doesnt work, then approach B should be tried.

My own personal definition of psychotic behavior is doing the same thing over and over again, hoping for a different outcome.

Just me, etc.

Sinergy 

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle


(in reply to twicehappy)
Profile   Post #: 80
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