pixelslave
Posts: 1444
Joined: 8/19/2006
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quote:
ORIGINAL: CaptveDesre
I'd like to begin this post by disclaiming some likely first impressions. I'm not writing to step on toes, to flame or troll, or because I am saddened by an empty inbox.
Why would a Domme take the position of a victim, who is constantly molested by a throng of submissive 'yesmen?' Males who have yet to mature to the stage of critical thought?
I should be clear here, my confusion doesn't rest in Dommes who display their distaste in these men. I feel that frustration. I feel their dead weight strapped to my ankles, preventing the repuation of a male submissive from reaching further than that of a pathetic worm (literally).
What does vex me is that this given Domme -and I refer to many that I have noticed- posts a self-promoting and mildly controversial tome of propaganda, rewarding the yes men (who jump at the chance to nod their head eagerly out of despiration) with attention and praise, only to turn around and speak sour about the type they choose to invite moments later.
Furthermore, when the rare submissive respectfully presents a differing opinion on this claim, he is pounced upon by the Domme and her... hm.. posse. Spoken to in a rude and callous tone due to his preference in actual thought rather than immediate, blind, and stupid submission.
Why is it that a submissive can not socially disagree with a Domme, in a chatroom or forum nonetheless; where tasteful and respectful ideas are intended to flow freely? Why is it one like this is frowned upon?
Is it wrong of me to consider this sort of dominant behavior and attitude silly and contradictory? Or should I shut up and nod like the rest of the sheep, next in line for her lambchop dinner rant?
I would also be interested to hear thoughts on the female submissive / male dominant dynamic as related to this subject, since I've noticed similar occurances and complaints.
Thank you sincerely for your time.
Captive Desire,
In my opinion, I'm not certain that what you've phrased as a question is anything more than a statement or series of opinions, veiled as questions. That said, you've asked for answers to what you've claimed to be a question as quoted above, and in fact you've received many responses. You've chosen to discount most, if not all of them. In my view, at least some had merit that you could have chosen to at least acknowledge and could have thanked those who replied in some small way (who it would now appear that they perhaps have wasted their time in posting their responses to you), by at least offering to consider the validity of their responses and to ponder upon them. I suspect your failure to do this is at the root of the problem you so loudly protest.
I've read your profile, and not to sound overly critical, but it reads "ME, ME, ME!" yet tells nothing about you or what you might have to offer a Domme. I'd highly recommend that you re-think your profile and rewrite it to say something about yourself as a person as well as what you have to offer a Domme as a submissive, instead of just what you want from the Domme you'd like to meet. 
Now when thinking about Dommes in general, what is it that attracts you to them? Is it not the fact that they indeed have opinions? As a sub, do you not ultimately desire to submit to their decisions? In no way am I suggesting that you should have no opinions of your own, only that the women of which you speak, are women whom you should expect to have very strong opinions which are likely to differ from your own! When speaking to them, I suggest you learn to speak in terms of "in my experience, this is what I've found...", "it seems to me...", and "Based on my experience, my preference is..." as opposed to speaking in absolutes, black & white terms, or even worse: trying to win an argument with one at all costs. Letting others know that you value their opinions, that their opinions have merit, are worthy of consideration, that they have given you a different viewpoint than you might otherwise ever have considered, or are something new that you'll have to spend time thinking about, are all things anyone will feel complimented to hear. In saying any one of those things, you've still completely retained the right to keep your existing opinion and it has cost you nothing to validate the opinion of another person in the process!  You might find that taking such an approach will get you much further along toward reaching your ultimate goal and will pay dividends to you in other areas of your life as well. 
- pixel
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Chivalry isn't dead! It's for those who have it in their hearts & are willing to be taught. It's a way of life, a code of honor; this one's armor still needs some polishing!
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