quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy

I have never seen Erin do the holier than thou thing. She ALWAYS respects everybodies right to practice their form of M/s or D/s the way that it makes them happiest.
 
It strikes me kind of funny that you thought i was referring to erin here when there were over 60 posts prior to this that i could have been referring to.

 
She does have very strong beliefs as to what constitutes certain ypes of relationships and often expresses her opinions on them.
 
And when you express an opinion on something here, it does get open up to debate (as most here already know). 
 
So let me take an opinion example and i will make it simple, so don't take this personally.
 
Say i start a thread that says 'This is just my opinion, and i am not referring to anyone in particular here, but it seems to me that anyone who uses the word 'twice' in their nicknames are quite insane.  Now this is just my opinion.'
 
And a hundred others could reply that they think i'm the nut here, not those with the nick 'twice'...and i can say a hundred times that that is their opinion...and i have mine.  In the end 100 people might think that i am a dumbass but hey, i don't care, because i have my opinion.  So be it.  Once i put my opinion out here, i opened the door for others to tell me what they think of me and 'my opinion'.
 
And to be honest, simply prefacing something with 'this is my opinion and it is not directed at anyone in particular' does not mean that it won't be taken personally by those it appears to refer to.  And then, of course, you can expect responses from them as well  (their opinions too of course).

 
As another posted stated this is a forum board; all should be free to express their opinion.
 
And all i've stated are opinions too.

 
I' ll take it one step further; we ought to be able to express our thoughts and ideas without running a three paragraph disclaimer to the effect that this is our opinion for fear of offending anyone or starting a war.
 
i'll keep your disclaimer in mind 
 
DG

 
Disclaimer: the above is the author's personal opinion and is not the opinion or policy of her owner or of the little green men that follow her around all day all day.
 
This post may or may not cite its references or sources.
 
The facts expressed here belong to everybody, the opinions to me. The distinction is yours to draw...
 
IMPORTANT: This post is intended for the use of the individual to whom I was responding and may contain information that is confidential, privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humor or irrational religious beliefs. If you are not the intended recipient, any whining, bitching or taking personally of this post is not authorized (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating social fauxpas.
 
No animals were harmed in the composition of this post, although Benji is authorized to hump your leg and piss on your carpet for taking the contents of afore mentioned post and either taking it personally or responding with any sentence containing the words " real" or " true" or any other Fuddism for that matter.
 
My opinion is neither copyrighted nor trademarked; If you like, I'll trade for one of yours.
 

 

quote:

ORIGINAL: starshineowned

Greetings..~smiles~

While I understand some inclusionary aspects might fall into someone wanting to loose themselves in order to be transformed..what you have presented happened to you is (in my eyes) abuse. I do not and can not automatically equate abuse with loosing yourself..as in: to loose yourself will result in this outcome.

You are correct though..this type of situation happens regardless of the dynamic setup, and does believe it just as easily. I do not feel that a D/s or M/s dynamic leads to a higher percentage or open door for this type of abuse to happen.

I use the term abuse lightly here and only see it as abuse "if" the party/s involved indicate such. Since things that we want and get ourselves involved with are so vastly different from a nilla relationship..the call of "abuse" on my part in what they are doing is extremely cautioned. Someone that does not or is not apart of these type of dynamic exchanges I can feel alittle more wiggle room.

I truely am sorry though that this happened to you. Never should it be anything to any degree that is not wanted in some form or fashion by the partys involved. With that said..the human will or spirit are incredibly strong, and very difficult to break completely. It is as humans I think our greatest gift, and a true seperation from the rest of the animal kingdom. It gets lost sometimes but its resiliancy is just amazing.

Thankyou for help in explaining this.

Well Wishes
starshine
Happy slave of Master Delvin

quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

Losing yourself is when you finally by some miracle find the strength to leave, and realize as you are standing in the grocery store on your own for the first time with tears running down your face, that you have no idea what to buy, because you don't even know what food you like. You don't know what to watch on TV.  You have forgotten how strong you are, and are afraid to be alone. You have spent so many years hearing how wrong you are that you no longer trust your instincts or your own opinions about yourself or anything else.

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

quote:

ORIGINAL: adaddysgirl
Sometimes it seems the 'holier than thous' are the first to complain about other 'holier than thous'....and their attempts at subtlety are often realized just for what they are.

So was this your attempt at subtlety?

Was i subtle?  i couldn't really tell if i was or not....lol.

You know what? I get it. You have an issue with me. It's fairly obvious as your commentary on several threads to me or about me makes it pretty clear. That's ok though. I've got enough friends.

i don't have an issue with you erin.....our opinions just seem to differ on many things.  And just as you have the right to express yours, i do as well.

My purpose in life isn't to win you over and your opinion of me isn't going to change me.

i don't expect it is...nor do i expect it will.

If you wish to continue to follow me from thead to thread and slam every opinion I have....go for it hun.

i really have no time for that.  i glance through all the threads on here.  If i have something to say, then i say it, regardless of who started the thread and whoever else has posted.  And since the 'abuse and consent' thread, i don't even really recall replying to any posts of yours.  Most times, i find it makes no sense for me to do so.  But sometimes, others say things that make sense to me and then i choose to reply.  But really, i do not have time to follow you around.

quote:

You use passive aggression, covert and snide little remarks (such as quoted here) and innuendo like i have never seen.  And then when someone calls you on it, you give some lame BS....trying to make it look like it is the other person who has issues...not you.
 
You're an Arien?  So am i....with a few more years experience.  Choose your battles wisely.  i've already been where you are now. 

I guess this quote you made to another poster, particularly the last paragraph, was an accurate depiction. You truly are experienced at this.

Ah yes, this was a previous post i made back when i first started here.  How convenient you found that
 
Now i could respond to this in several ways but this is what i choose to say.  i hope you are not going to resort to prior posts as a means of proving some point (although it does seem to be your forte to quote others when trying to make a point)....because i would be most certain there could be a few i could drag out myself posted by you that would seem less than favorable. 
 
As a matter of fact, as i was browsing some old threads, i came across some of yours.  Many of them start out the same way and just have to express some opinion on what others do in their relationships....and how you just can't seem to identify with them (kinks, micromanagement, abuse, safewords, autonomy, etc).  Most of those ended up with others referring to you as judgmental.  i wonder why that is  
 
i'll tell ya what....why not just start a thread on 'It's all about erin'.  i would be glad to read it.
 
DG

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

Just some random bullshit running through my mind as I read the thread

quote:

ORIGINAL: starshineowned


People come in with set views and opinions based on their own perceptions of their own experiences. People after reading so many other persons views and opinions may have and most likely will to some degree alter that either by a complete turn around or atleast alittle more understanding and acceptance of or they may not change at all.

When i first came on here, i had quite a different notion about what slaves were and i am glad i have had the chance to hear many different views.  Even that whole dialogue i had with prop some time ago gave me a different perspective.  And when i started a couple of threads on LTRs, and Monogamy, that gave me even further insight.  Personally, i like to hear different views and i have an open mind so that even when something doesn't particularly pertain to me, i can still accept what it means to others.  And i am really happy that they have found their fulfillment....and i admire that, regardless of what means or methods they use to attain such fulfillment.  So i for one have really learned some things on here.

This realism is there though, and sort of makes doing such pointless to me. (shall I add a disclaimer here or is it pretty obvious that this is only my opinion?) ..snort

And i think you better add the disclaimer.  There's already another thread started on it.....hehe.
 
DG

quote:

ORIGINAL: acctonthelook

There's so much reading material for people to learn about the mutual respect, style of loving, protocol, steps a relationship takes to be a good D/s relationship long term, etc.  Half the time only the people who've been around a long time know where the links are or books in print. 

I wish more often people would include links to more information when posting, so more people can learn and not just go with what others say is so or what the current OP trends are.  It leads the newer generation within D/s down a misinformed path to what D/s is really about.  I'm not giving a link because I'm not on my own computer where I can get them, but I too love when there are links to protocol, collar information, dynamic within D/s, etc. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: adaddysgirl

It strikes me kind of funny that you thought i was referring to erin here when there were over 60 posts prior to this that i could have been referring to.

quote:

ORIGINAL: adaddysgirl

And a hundred others could reply that they think i'm the nut here, not those with the nick 'twice'...and i can say a hundred times that that is their opinion...and i have mine.  In the end 100 people might think that i am a dumbass but hey, i don't care, because i have my opinion.  So be it.  Once i put my opinion out here, i opened the door for others to tell me what they think of me and 'my opinion'.

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

Aren't there two types of losing one's self? For example I can lose myself in a good book, a sunset, in writing. I can become completely engrossed in something that I lose all track of time and space and become absorbed by it. To lose one's self in a relationship in this way means to me that the connection and the intimacy with one's lover is so deep that they can become absorbed in the moment by it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

I can tell you how it happened to me, in a non D/s situation but in my  marriage.  It happens slowly - so slowly you do not see it.  This slow erosion of spirit until you are so whittled down you do not know what you think or feel on your own.  You are not happy yet you don't know why.  You are just kind of numb, because you do not know how else to feel.