Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: A question to stir things up


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: A question to stir things up Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/10/2007 9:52:19 PM   
BBBTBW


Posts: 836
Joined: 5/21/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: subsnow

i had to sit and think about this for a minute. It didn't take me long to decide that i would be more hurt to find Him having sex with a Dominant female. That would mean to me that everything about Him was a lie unless He had already told me that He was a switch.


This is an interesting thread.  I am a DOMINANT FEMALE and I just have to ask, why you think he would be a switch if he were with a DOMINANT FEMALE?  Having sex with someone doesn't change a persons orientation, it just means they are attracted to more than one type.

With that said, when I was training to be a DOMINANT I trained as a sub to get the feel from both sides and I have to say it would have devistated me either way unless there was open conversation about it and I was able to meet the person.  If there is a change in the dynamic of a relationship the  people involved should have the opportunity to voice their concerns.

_____________________________

"You keep using that word, I do not think it means what you think it means" -- Inigo Montoya, The Princess Bride

(in reply to subsnow)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/10/2007 10:13:06 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SpinnerofTales

Here's a question just to spark discussion...aimed at all female slaves and subs:
Which would you find more damaging to your relationhip with a Dom...to come home and find him having sex with a submissive man or a dominant woman?

(The reason I don't ask men is that we ALL want to see two women making it so it would be a whole different set of responses)




The hypothetical is irrelevant to me as my Master would do neither. 

(in reply to SpinnerofTales)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/10/2007 10:34:59 PM   
deeddlit


Posts: 484
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		Yeah, this one would just have me reduced to a puddle of goo followed shortly by "Don't bother looking...cuz you WON'T find me!"

This question for me, like several others here, has nothing to do with male/female or Dom/sub.  It has everything to do with trust...the very foundation of ANY relationship.

Communication and honesty just cannot ever be stressed enough!

Take care and Be Cause!!
Ladydeeddlit

< Message edited by deeddlit -- 1/10/2007 10:43:27 PM >

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/10/2007 10:47:14 PM   
losttreasure


Posts: 875
Joined: 12/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

But the submissive man would squick me more than a dominant woman.


I would agree wholeheartedly on that, Julia.  *shudders*

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/10/2007 11:08:00 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SpinnerofTales

(The reason I don't ask men is that we ALL want to see two women making it so it would be a whole different set of responses)



this is about as stupid of a comment as I have seen on these boards.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to SpinnerofTales)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/10/2007 11:23:12 PM   
susie


Posts: 1699
Joined: 11/21/2004
Status: offline 		For me I would have a real issue if I found him having sex with a man full stop. In our relationship Master is allowed to have sex with other women, it is part of our agreement so that would not be a problem. Also knowing him, I know that if he was having sex with a Domme he would still be the one in the Dominant role.

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/10/2007 11:45:35 PM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SpinnerofTales

Here's a question just to spark discussion...aimed at all female slaves and subs:
Which would you find more damaging to your relationhip with a Dom...to come home and find him having sex with a submissive man or a dominant woman?


I'd be surprised, hope they at least took pictures (video taped would be even better) for me to view later and if I were invited to join, it'd be all good. Unfortunately, it's not going to happen as Himself is very straight on the one hand and on the other, I've completely spoiled him for the desire to have sex with any other woman on the planet.  That said, it remains a very hot fantasy for me. ::chuckles:: In any event, neither of those scenarios would cause any damage at all to our relationship.

quote:

(The reason I don't ask men is that we ALL want to see two women making it so it would be a whole different set of responses)


Such absolutes are, almost by default, quite incorrect. Having been raised in the SF area of CA, I can assure you there are plenty of men folk who would toss their cookies at the very idea of watching two women engaging in sexual intercourse. You can't even qualify it to all straight men because it's just not true.

You might want to rethink your absolutes for future conversations.

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to SpinnerofTales)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/11/2007 12:13:24 AM   
XMidnightX


Posts: 6
Joined: 12/30/2006
Status: offline 		Well, sometimes sex is just sex. If I found Him having sex with a Domme, well, hell..He just wanted a piece of booty, more power to Him. If I walked in on Him having sex with a sub male, I'd be drooling all over my self. Either way..it's making Him happy. Who am I to question it? As long as it isn't changing or hurting O/our relationship...I don't see ythe problem. 


< Message edited by XMidnightX -- 1/11/2007 12:38:39 AM >

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/11/2007 1:35:43 AM   
dawntreader


Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline 		Both - our relationship is based on monagomy...

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to SpinnerofTales)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/11/2007 2:34:13 AM   
brightspot


Posts: 3052
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: crouchingtigress

it would be the exact same for me, i would feel betrayed no matter what.


This is how I would feel, even though it would be a Domina for me.
The damage would be done more so by her being with another behind my back unconsenually, which would destroy my trust, the base of which my relationships flourish.
 
As for the choice if I had to pick... I would agree with subsnow that finding her with a Dominant woman as opposed to a sub/slave would be more crushing if she were bottoming to the other Domina because it would also cause me to doubt the whole dynamic of our "open, honest" relationship.
 
Missy.

_____________________________

"Comedy is NOT Pretty!" ~Peter Nelson

But..."May at Least One person have a sense of Humor!" ~KML.

http://360.yahoo.com/my_profile-TD4TwEw8crWS3GHFDcs_DK1rHmW6Dq_E;_ylt=Av2PfG9gH0wkQrMPivuMCivGAOJ3

(in reply to crouchingtigress)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/11/2007 3:22:27 AM   
Squeakers


Posts: 489
Joined: 10/3/2006
Status: offline 		    For me it would all depend on the situation.   I would hope in either case it would be protected sex.   I have never had an issue with the whole sex thing because sex is sex.   I'd be more apt to be upset if he said, "I am in love with this man/woman."
   I'd more than likely find some humor in the whole thing and blurt out if he were with a man, "Told ya that getting your ass fucked like that hurts," or if a woman, "Did we have money in the budget to pay for that?"   Then slip out of the room.
  Seriously, I would be very surprised about either situation.   I could see a very slim possibility of him maybe beating a male submissive but nothing sexual and I could see him getting it on sexually with a Domme but never submitting to her.  

(in reply to brightspot)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/11/2007 3:43:28 AM   
SpinnerofTales


Posts: 1586
Joined: 5/30/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

quote:

ORIGINAL: SpinnerofTales

(The reason I don't ask men is that we ALL want to see two women making it so it would be a whole different set of responses)



this is about as stupid of a comment as I have seen on these boards.


Actually, Knight, it was what we people on Earth call "a joke"...we human beings use such "jokes" to make other human beings smile or laugh by being absurd, ridiculous or completely outside the realm of facts. To enjoy these "Jokes" one needs what we humans call "a sense of humor"...I am not sure where one goes to get one if they are not from here..but I think anyone taking such a comment seriously is in desperate need of one.

Thanks for playing, though.

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/11/2007 3:47:00 AM   
SpinnerofTales


Posts: 1586
Joined: 5/30/2006
Status: offline

quote:

(The reason I don't ask men is that we ALL want to see two women making it so it would be a whole different set of responses)


Such absolutes are, almost by default, quite incorrect. Having been raised in the SF area of CA, I can assure you there are plenty of men folk who would toss their cookies at the very idea of watching two women engaging in sexual intercourse. You can't even qualify it to all straight men because it's just not true.

You might want to rethink your absolutes for future conversations.

Celeste


I have said this before and I'll say it again...it was a JOKE fergodssake :grin: I will,  however, in future conversations, make sure to use a special font to denote any attempts at humor. My aplogies for not thinking of this sooner.

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/11/2007 3:54:07 AM   
bandit25


Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline 		Yeah, it might be best if you stuck in some sort of disclaimer...too many posters speak in absolutes here.  Although it gets tiring to do so, you avoid misunderstandings.  I'm not being contrary here.  It just makes things easier sometimes.

(in reply to SpinnerofTales)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/11/2007 4:28:21 AM   
twicehappy


Posts: 2706
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
Scooter is Very staight but if he was not or if it was a submissive female my answer would be the same. He already has sex on a regular basis with a Domme but even if it was a Domme not his wife(Jewel) the answer remains the same.
 
Umm.... Exactly why would i care either way?
 
His dick is not a popsicle, it does not melt from use and i KNOW it will be ready again in about five minutes.
 
Not to mention it is HIS dick after all.
 
ScooterTrash owns me, i do not own him. 

Lol, i'm with you Bita, i might wait to be asked to climb in  or at least view the video. Having seen and been with Scooter and another woman it is pretty fucking hot!

< Message edited by twicehappy -- 1/11/2007 4:37:56 AM >

_____________________________

Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations.

The human heart is not a finite container but an ever expanding universe with all the stars contained there in.

(in reply to SpinnerofTales)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/11/2007 4:49:46 AM   
Donnalee


Posts: 339
Joined: 7/15/2006
Status: offline 		Great question to get the mind whirling!

I think the first part for me would be the look on his face.  That would be where I would begin....not the partner, but how he reacted to getting "caught".

(in reply to twicehappy)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/11/2007 5:28:59 AM   
MaryT


Posts: 553
Joined: 12/8/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SpinnerofTales

Here's a question just to spark discussion...aimed at all female slaves and subs:
Which would you find more damaging to your relationhip with a Dom...to come home and find him having sex with a submissive man or a dominant woman?

(The reason I don't ask men is that we ALL want to see two women making it so it would be a whole different set of responses)


Supposing monogamy had been agreed upon in advance, I guess I would feel betrayed.  If monogamy had not been a requirement, it's none of my business.  But I would ask permission to watch.   

I've always found the idea of two men together to be kind of hot ... but I'm perverted anyway.

(in reply to SpinnerofTales)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/11/2007 5:30:13 AM   
Kalira


Posts: 954
Joined: 10/9/2006
From: Fort Wayne Indiana
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SpinnerofTales

Here's a question just to spark discussion...aimed at all female slaves and subs:
Which would you find more damaging to your relationhip with a Dom...to come home and find him having sex with a submissive man or a dominant woman?

(The reason I don't ask men is that we ALL want to see two women making it so it would be a whole different set of responses)



I would find neither damaging if the truth be known. Master has the right to have sex with who ever he so chooses.

_____________________________

Facilius Per Partes In Cognitionem Totius Adducimur
We are more easily led part by part to an understanding of the whole.
Seneca

Damnant Quod Non Intellegunt

(in reply to SpinnerofTales)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/11/2007 5:31:53 AM   
Wildfleurs


Posts: 1650
Joined: 9/24/2004
From: Connecticut
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SpinnerofTales

Here's a question just to spark discussion...aimed at all female slaves and subs:
Which would you find more damaging to your relationhip with a Dom...to come home and find him having sex with a submissive man or a dominant woman?

(The reason I don't ask men is that we ALL want to see two women making it so it would be a whole different set of responses)




I don't know if I'd find either damaging, so long as I knew that he was using protection and I was expecting it.  We have a primarily monogamous but definitely flexible relationship and I've discovered recently that its really really hot to watch him fuck someone else, so I'd prolly want to join in. 

I like to watch two men together, but since my owner is as straight as a board its confined to me watching gay sm videos.  So I guess if I took the hypothetical absolutely seriously and applied it to my relationship it would only be a dominant woman, but he's not sexually attracted to dominant women (though he/we definitely have dominant women friends).  But either way (either gender) I'd definitely want to watch and participate.

C~


_____________________________

"Just because you've always done it that way doesn't mean it's not incredibly stupid." -despair.com

~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
The heart of it all - http://www.wildfleurs.com
~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

(in reply to SpinnerofTales)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: A question to stir things up - 1/11/2007 6:09:15 AM   
sweetnurseBBW


Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline 		If it wasn't something I knew about or expected than both would be. Betrayal is betrayal no matter who it is. On the other hand I am his property and he makes the rules.

< Message edited by sweetnurseBBW -- 1/11/2007 6:10:31 AM >

_____________________________

Sir Pain's pain slut

(in reply to SpinnerofTales)
Profile   Post #: 40
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: A question to stir things up Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.078