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RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 8:10:47 AM   
Magdalena156


Posts: 99
Joined: 2/13/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: GeekyGirl
Part of why you don't see us around much is because older Lifestyler's don't take us seriously sometimes, and we feel uncomfortable about our young age. The two times I went to a munch, I felt VERY uncomfortable, as all the people there were 40+ and looking at me like "What's this 'kid' doing here?"



Have you scoped out a local TNG group?  I attend them for that very reason.  I am almost 29 but can pass for 21--and that can be a liability in being taken seriously in any walk of life whether it's my job or in the scene.


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RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 8:12:30 AM   
Magdalena156


Posts: 99
Joined: 2/13/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: kisshou

The best place to find the kind of girl you are looking for is in the library. I am not joking here , find one near you that is open on Friday night and cruise the stacks. The next best time would be on a Saturday afternoon. Good luck , hope you find the girl of your dreams :)


The best luck I've had in meeting new potential partners would be mutual interest groups.  Do you like science fiction?  RPGs?  Computers?  Anime?  Knitting?  Sports?  If you have an interest you're passionate about, join a meetup group that discusses them and you'll have the opportunity to meet all sorts of new people who can at the very least carry on a conversation with you.


-m



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RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 8:14:50 AM   
GeekyGirl


Posts: 905
Joined: 8/21/2006
Status: offline 		While I agree on principle, I wouldn't write people under 25 off as college kids either. I'm 24, have been divorced for 4 years, been in the work force for 4 years in confinement/law enforcement plus have the 2nd job of helping my parents run our equestrian facilty. I was never a typical college kid. Never been to a real "party" in my life. I also get told I am very "old" for my age. Always been a home body and always been mature for my age.

I do agree that kids do a lot of growing up in the early 20's. I started exploring D/s before I was even 18 but didn't really understand myself enough to get serious about it until about 2 yrs ago.Before then, it was all play partners and fun. I feel like I'm still growing and learning, but I also don't like being lumped in with frat boys and sorority girls.

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RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 8:25:13 AM   
Magdalena156


Posts: 99
Joined: 2/13/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: GeekyGirl

While I agree on principle, I wouldn't write people under 25 off as college kids either. I'm 24, have been divorced for 4 years, been in the work force for 4 years in confinement/law enforcement plus have the 2nd job of helping my parents run our equestrian facilty. I was never a typical college kid. Never been to a real "party" in my life. I also get told I am very "old" for my age. Always been a home body and always been mature for my age.


Right--which is why I said "most".  I know of some people in your situation and under such circumstances you have to grow up very fast.  Ditto for people who went off into the military around that age or younger. 

It all comes down to life experiences.  Most haven't had the ones you have had, and that's why I say it comes down to statistics and isn't a hard and fast rule.


-m



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RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 8:28:35 AM   
GeekyGirl


Posts: 905
Joined: 8/21/2006
Status: offline 		On that note I agree. I credit two things for me "growing up fast." One being my divorce. The other being my profession. You will see things in prisons and jails that other people will NEVER experience and you will grow up very, very fast!

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RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 8:32:05 AM   
Magdalena156


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Joined: 2/13/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: GeekyGirl

On that note I agree. I credit two things for me "growing up fast." One being my divorce. The other being my profession. You will see things in prisons and jails that other people will NEVER experience and you will grow up very, very fast!


I can imagine--that's why I brought up the military example.  I figured it was on par with that.  Very life changing experiences, and you won't emerge the same.

I was pretty mature for my age growing up, but when it came to my sexuality I was a complete innocent for a long time--it was a weird package on the whole.  Most of my problem was that I was only attracted to older men and didn't want to make some guy go to jail on my behalf.  :P  On the whole I'm glad that I waited as long as I did, but I made a lot of stupid mistakes very quickly, and that can make someone cynical real fast.

-m



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RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 8:40:14 AM   
GeekyGirl


Posts: 905
Joined: 8/21/2006
Status: offline 		I made a lot of stupid sexual mistakes myself and have become cynical because of it...mostly because I WASN'T innocent, lol. I became highly sexual at a young age and began to explore a LOT (though I didn't have intercourse until I was of legal age.) To an extent, I feel jaded and as though I sort of skipped my youth and innocence.

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RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 8:50:23 AM   
Magdalena156


Posts: 99
Joined: 2/13/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GeekyGirl

I made a lot of stupid sexual mistakes myself and have become cynical because of it...mostly because I WASN'T innocent, lol. I became highly sexual at a young age and began to explore a LOT (though I didn't have intercourse until I was of legal age.) To an extent, I feel jaded and as though I sort of skipped my youth and innocence.


I wound up taking a lengthy hiatus from dating, relationships, and the bdsm scene in general as a result of some very bad experiences.  And  I'm thankful that I did.  I was definitely heading into the range of jaded, cynical, and bitter and it wasn't doing me any good.

The good news about it all is that I have fine tuned radar now for meeting people and know who is worth my time and who is taking me for a ride.  Sadly I had to learn much of that the hard way.


-m






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RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 9:00:54 AM   
simplygrl


Posts: 46
Joined: 7/6/2005
Status: offline 		We exist.  I've met several young submissives like myself.  Though, as the time goes by it is certainly *nice* to not be the youngest one around (which is happening a hellva lot less frequently now-a-days :))...but not the point.  I don't know where you're looking, or not looking, but I can say with a strong degree of authority...that there are girls that have just *known* they were submissive since they were exceptionally young (I knew what I felt, wanted, etc, but didn't know what it was until I started researching in the internet (about age 16...19 before any "real" experience)...mostly because at that time I thought I had some sort of mental illness ;))...but young submissives *are* around.  You may be running into a problem of finding the girls that are submissive, but haven't quite figured it out or have no real-life experience...and then getting scared reading your profiles or correspondences...and dissappearing from the dialog. 

But that's just my ramblings.  I'm sure I could say it in a clearer fashion, but considering I'm moderately incoherant with cough medicine, that's about as good as it gets this time around. ;)

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RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 9:06:40 AM   
simplygrl


Posts: 46
Joined: 7/6/2005
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quote:

Why do subs exist? Theory :-(often) sub men can't get their dick up so offer submission instead; (often) sub women are unattractive so offer submission instead.

Young women under the age of 25 are a) more attractive to normal men b) still believe strongly they will get Mr Right and the perfect marriage. So ... what would they be doing here looking for you?

I would also say do not go looking for under 25 subs. they may be sub because they are damaged but they may yet still be young enough to break free.



I am not damaged.  I am a healthy, college educated, professional girl.  I have plenty of "vanilla" dates if I choose to have them.  I am submissive.  I will eventually find a situation where I can grow as a submissive, as well as have the more "normal" aspects of life...like marriage and children.  I believe it is possible.  I suppose on that aspect you're correct--I will find Mr. Right....but he'll be much more than that.  For now, I'm content to learn and grow.

/end rant.

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RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 9:08:25 AM   
Magdalena156


Posts: 99
Joined: 2/13/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: simplygrl

We exist.  I've met several young submissives like myself.  Though, as the time goes by it is certainly *nice* to not be the youngest one around (which is happening a hellva lot less frequently now-a-days :))...but not the point.  I don't know where you're looking, or not looking, but I can say with a strong degree of authority...that there are girls that have just *known* they were submissive since they were exceptionally young (I knew what I felt, wanted, etc, but didn't know what it was until I started researching in the internet (about age 16...19 before any "real" experience)...mostly because at that time I thought I had some sort of mental illness ;))...but young submissives *are* around.  You may be running into a problem of finding the girls that are submissive, but haven't quite figured it out or have no real-life experience...and then getting scared reading your profiles or correspondences...and dissappearing from the dialog. 


I figured it out around that age too, but was too scared and completely and utterly inexperienced towards sex in general to do a damned thing about it.

Side note, I didn't lose my virginity until I was 22.  :)


-m



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RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 9:15:53 AM   
azzmaster


Posts: 864
Joined: 2/15/2007
Status: offline 		wait till the sub comes to you. thas how it sposed 2 go. there is subs of all ages, the young ones just get snapped up quick.

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RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 9:16:13 AM   
sensualmagirl


Posts: 1065
Joined: 7/4/2006
From: Boston, MA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mymasterssub69

quote:

ORIGINAL: DemonSadist

quote:

ORIGINAL: mymasterssub69

question - do the submissives have to be under 25? have you considered broadening your horizons and taking an older submissive? merely curious

i have found as an older submissive i attrarct both ends of the age spectrum within the BDSM community. one former master, a Brit like yourself, was 10yrs younger than me and the oldest is my Daddy.

good luck in your search



No I have no problem with taking an older submissive. All the ones I have met who are older than me (I'm 25) have problems with Doms younger than them.


i must be the exceptation then. age is only a number - it's the level of your maturity and experience that's the deciding factor for me.





I realize this thread is about a month old, I don't think I was posting back then, but this came up on that scrolling window above, and it lead me to see the above post.

You are not the only exception   My Papi/Master is much younger than myself as well... he has more experience than myself... worked out well for me! And, as you said, age is also only a number.

Good luck to the OP, I wouldn't give up hope, there is bound to be someone.

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RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 9:17:55 AM   
simplygrl


Posts: 46
Joined: 7/6/2005
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quote:

I figured it out around that age too, but was too scared and completely and utterly inexperienced towards sex in general to do a damned thing about it.

Side note, I didn't lose my virginity until I was 22.  :)



I can totally understand that statement--granted, I was 19 when I did...but I was so niave and inexperienced when I first started figuring things out--hell, I was the sheltered girl growing up...I wasn't aware that the "penis" went INTO the "vagina" and furthermore, wouldn't that hurt?...at age 16.  Oh, that story sounds *horrible* now heh.

But it's the truth.  I guess part of why I'm okay with it now, and was then (at least with researching it and finding out as much as I could)...is, oddly enough, that I had great parents that always supported me and encouraged me to try whatever I was interested in (with other activities...I would *never* tell them about bdsm ;)) and I felt relatively safe to explore all sides of myself.  Still do. :)

_____________________________

_./'\._¸¸.•¤**¤•.¸.•¤**¤•….*
*•. .•**His wish is my command*..**
/.•*•.\ ¸..•¤**¤•., .•¤**¤•.*.*

;)

(in reply to Magdalena156)
Profile   Post #: 134
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 9:46:44 AM   
Magdalena156


Posts: 99
Joined: 2/13/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: simplygrl

I can totally understand that statement--granted, I was 19 when I did...but I was so niave and inexperienced when I first started figuring things out--hell, I was the sheltered girl growing up...I wasn't aware that the "penis" went INTO the "vagina" and furthermore, wouldn't that hurt?...at age 16.  Oh, that story sounds *horrible* now heh.


Oh gawds, I wasn't that innocent at least, LOL!  Mentally I was pretty...um...precocious.  I developed sexual interests by the time I was nine and was well aware of the "facts of life" when I was seven.  My parents had to tell me what was up when I was that age because I was developing breasts and body hair.

I think there was a part of the back of my mind that wanted to protect me from myself and I suppose I should be thankful.


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RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 4:45:09 PM   
pickingrinnin


Posts: 19
Joined: 2/16/2007
Status: offline 		In my experience, most women in the BDSM community got involved with it in their 30s or older.  They may have spent most of their adult life with S&M style fantasies, but tend to not act on them (in any public way, at least) until they hit their sexual peaks.  Though we  tend to peak closer to the beginning of our fertile years (13-24 or so), many women don't reach theirs until they are within the last decade or two of theirs. 

There are a number of other possible reasons for this phenomenon, but only a small percent of the kinky women out there will actually move towards real life BDSM situations and relationships before age 25 (again, in my experience).  There are always exceptions (and I know several), but your chances of finding a 21-year old slave are just not that high.

- Jesse

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RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 4:48:32 PM   
wyldsubmissive


Posts: 157
Joined: 5/7/2005
Status: offline 		I'm 19 so I hope to SHED come light on this.

IMHO, I believe that there are so few genuine subs under 25 because people as a whole don't really figure out things concretely in their minds until 25-30 age range. They're still figuring themselves out. Hell, I don't know whether I'm dominant or submissive yet because I've got both sides to me.

However, the ones that are genuine know themselves. And that's what I'd advise looking for.

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RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 6:54:25 PM   
collaredlilone


Posts: 34
Joined: 12/6/2005
Status: offline 		mind you this is just girl's opinion and based on what she has found of her age group. girl is 20 and a live in slave to her Master and Mistress in Ohio. very rarely will you actually find someone my age or a little older who is commited and ready to take the step of being slave and owned in their life. you have the bratiness mode, you have the fakes yes. and ones who just want to play like its a new fad and not a actual day after day lifestyle. girl is a rare one. she has never gotten along with ones her age. imaturity, and so on. girl had to grow up fast but the norm is like this. its simply a part of growing up. yes there are ones out there seeking to really serve and know the lifestyle is for them. but they are very few yes.
girl just wanted to note to you not to give up. Master and Mistress were not expecting what they have gotten as a 20 year old slave. they are out there. they are ones you do not look for. they come to you.
this is just what girl has learned and would suggest. dont give up. there is the girl out there for you.
thankyou for letting girl share this
girl

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RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 7:13:31 PM   
NYMaster101


Posts: 107
Joined: 7/11/2005
Status: offline 		It is quite difficult to find genunine fem subs of ANY age!

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RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 2/17/2007 7:34:40 PM   
FukinTroll


Posts: 6277
Joined: 2/6/2007
From: Under a bridge
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: wyldsubmissive

I'm 19 so I hope to SHED come light on this.

IMHO, I believe that there are so few genuine subs under 25 because people as a whole don't really figure out things concretely in their minds until 25-30 age range. They're still figuring themselves out. Hell, I don't know whether I'm dominant or submissive yet because I've got both sides to me.

However, the ones that are genuine know themselves. And that's what I'd advise looking for.



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Friggen misbehaving subs...... I’m getting the hose.

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