Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under 25?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under 25? Page: <<   < prev  3 4 [5] 6 7   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/17/2007 9:49:17 PM   
smirkingsheep


Posts: 45
Joined: 1/5/2007
Status: offline 		I'm an 18 year old sub, and I'm fairly certain I'm a genuine sub.  But dispite that, I'm not on this site looking for a Dom, because as others have said, I'm just exploring.  I know some people could be potentially extremely discouraging (in their approach or their motives), and I'd really rather not be scared off from a lifestyle that I think would suit me very well.
I'm afraid of finding fakes too - whether they know they're a fake or not.  Terrified, I've never wanted to introduce someone to BDSM myself because I'd be afraid they were just doing it to make me happy (I've sort of been in this situation before, it didn't end pleasant).  While I'd definitly want someone close to my own age, I also wouldn't want someone of such an age that claims to be so experienced.  I'd be looking for someone who was upfront about wanting someone to explore with - because I don't know near enough to even pretend I don't need to explore.

I can't remember my point.

EDIT: Maybe my point was that... well.  I could see people not counting my profile as a genuine sub's profile because I'm almost intentionally discouraging.  Is it possible that other subs do the same for similar reasons, but in a different way?  (I try to be very honest about it while trying not to come off like a bitch.  Obviously.)

< Message edited by smirkingsheep -- 1/17/2007 10:08:43 PM >

(in reply to LTRsubNW)
Profile   Post #: 81
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/18/2007 1:49:16 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DemonSadist

I'm 25 and have had this problem since I was 18 really. Websites are just totally full of fake pictures, it's a huge pain to trawl through scores of profiles to find one that's real let alone one your compatible with. I'm sure there's more under 25 women who like to submit than to dominate in general, but withtin the bdsm community there sure does seem to be a lack.

Any clues from people more experienced in the community?


keep trolling... you will start getting some nibbles as you approach 30... and hell if your worth your salt... they will be jumping in the boat by 40.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to DemonSadist)
Profile   Post #: 82
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/18/2007 8:59:30 AM   
dancingjade


Posts: 5
Joined: 1/16/2007
Status: offline 		Youre striking out for a variety of reasons. First your screename is kinda cheesy. Second is your attitude. Third, you need to not try so hard.


(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 83
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/18/2007 9:01:30 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dancingjade
Youre striking out for a variety of reasons. First your screename is kinda cheesy. Second is your attitude. Third, you need to not try so hard.

And I'm sure he'll go crying in his bed where his two girls wait for him.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to dancingjade)
Profile   Post #: 84
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/18/2007 9:06:03 AM   
Amaros


Posts: 1363
Joined: 7/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DemonSadist

I'm 25 and have had this problem since I was 18 really. Websites are just totally full of fake pictures, it's a huge pain to trawl through scores of profiles to find one that's real let alone one your compatible with. I'm sure there's more under 25 women who like to submit than to dominate in general, but withtin the bdsm community there sure does seem to be a lack.

Any clues from people more experienced in the community?


I see a healthy representitive sample in the profiles, but there may well not be that many commited masochists under 25 - I think it might be something that most gradually come to enjoy, rather than a lifelong thing they can't wait to put into practice on their 18th birthday.

I know a lot of younger women fantasize about it, but that isn't neccessarily the same thing as being able to integrate it into your life - the late teens, early Twenties is a time when you are integrating with the rest of the world, becoming accustomed to working and having responsibilities.

I've seen chicks gel out during this stage, and become very vulnurable, but I dunno if that's the same thing as knowing what you like and seeking it out.

(in reply to DemonSadist)
Profile   Post #: 85
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/18/2007 9:14:31 AM   
popeye1250


Posts: 18104
Joined: 1/27/2006
From: New Hampshire
Status: offline 		It's been my experience that most people don't discover this lifestyle until later in life.
I've met many women who didn't discover B&D/M/s until they were in their 30's and 40's.
That's not to say that there aren't women in their teens and 20's who aren't interested in it or who don't fantacise about it.
Some people don't realise that there are many others like themselves out here for whatever reason.

(in reply to DemonSadist)
Profile   Post #: 86
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/18/2007 9:35:23 AM   
amlonging


Posts: 153
Joined: 6/28/2006
Status: offline 		Words are powerful. The use of one incorrect word can foul many a girls head.... BUT I think Ron as said the real reason so many under 25 are not responding.....
When it comes to the real thing..looking over the edge... they run like hell.  Even those that come out and say they are looking for real time.
 
Laying out ones desires in a profile is the choice of the writer.  Font or background color are used for a purpose and to condemn the writer for the font or the color seems frivolous to me.
 
But I would like to make one BIG point.... rather than NOT responding, the girls could at least inquire...its not a committment, its not being owned, its just responding with a question or clarification or whatever.  

There are genuine subs under 25.  Subs who have been abused, are scared but still have a desire to submit, are just not sure of what they want...so never ask questions ....  of anyone.  Just post pics and demand a pic in return.

DS asks a question ONLY those under 25 can answer.  And I would venture to guess, not many under 25 read these forum boards.

And I'd like to add...DS has been here TWO days, posted 29 times and has already exhausted his search????   

_____________________________

BEHIND EVERY GREAT WOMAN...
...is a butt she can learn to love.

(in reply to DemonSadist)
Profile   Post #: 87
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/18/2007 1:19:07 PM   
justinasamerk


Posts: 153
Joined: 8/1/2006
Status: offline 		Speaking as a girl who started in  this lifestyle just shy  of 18 and her experiences...
Why is it  hard to find a submissive girl under 25??

1)College, school, family pressure. If you live in an expensive suburban  area (like in NY)...most girls under 25 are still living at home with family since can't aford to move out
2)still a little confused about what they want, what there place is, what this "lifestyle" is all about. Eager  to learn, yet searching for a strong, intelligent and mature mentor
3)from a young  female perspective guys 25 and under are SOOOOO immature...*shrugs*

(in reply to DemonSadist)
Profile   Post #: 88
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/18/2007 1:41:19 PM   
jezzabelle


Posts: 391
Joined: 2/5/2005
From: Southeastern, MA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: justinasamerk

1)College, school, family pressure. If you live in an expensive suburban  area (like in NY)...most girls under 25 are still living at home with family since can't aford to move out
2)still a little confused about what they want, what there place is, what this "lifestyle" is all about. Eager  to learn, yet searching for a strong, intelligent and mature mentor
3)from a young  female perspective guys 25 and under are SOOOOO immature...*shrugs*


i'm sure that others might add to this list things such as, not being ready for a committed relationship at that young of an age, being inexperienced in the lifestyle, they may not know if they are masochists yet and really not ready and eager to get involved with someone that wants to dole out the pain, etc.

(in reply to justinasamerk)
Profile   Post #: 89
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/18/2007 2:09:14 PM   
Killbotsgirl


Posts: 95
Joined: 10/25/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: justinasamerk

Speaking as a girl who started in  this lifestyle just shy  of 18 and her experiences...
Why is it  hard to find a submissive girl under 25??

1)College, school, family pressure. If you live in an expensive suburban  area (like in NY)...most girls under 25 are still living at home with family since can't aford to move out
2)still a little confused about what they want, what there place is, what this "lifestyle" is all about. Eager  to learn, yet searching for a strong, intelligent and mature mentor
3)from a young  female perspective guys 25 and under are SOOOOO immature...*shrugs*
the third point that you have is true to a point however men 25 and older have more experiance and are immature to a point but not to that point where you want to wack them upside the head for being stupid but it also depends on their iq levels the ones that have an iq more then 120 tend to go to the crazy side but hey ya still gotta love their sense of humor

(in reply to justinasamerk)
Profile   Post #: 90
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/18/2007 3:56:10 PM   
CandleInTheWind


Posts: 347
Joined: 10/20/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DemonSadist

I'm 25 and have had this problem since I was 18 really. Websites are just totally full of fake pictures, it's a huge pain to trawl through scores of profiles to find one that's real let alone one your compatible with. I'm sure there's more under 25 women who like to submit than to dominate in general, but withtin the bdsm community there sure does seem to be a lack.

Any clues from people more experienced in the community?


perhaps becasue it takes some time for women to realize what it is that they are???

I know that it took me a while to be comfortable in whom i am..outside of my marriage

_____________________________

It is better to be hated for something that you are
than it is to be loved for something you are not

(in reply to DemonSadist)
Profile   Post #: 91
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/18/2007 4:00:52 PM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline 		Their mentors raped and killed them all..

out.

D.G.

p.s. Jesus please protect me from your followers.

(in reply to CandleInTheWind)
Profile   Post #: 92
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/18/2007 4:21:23 PM   
kyraofMists


Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: dancingjade
Youre striking out for a variety of reasons. First your screename is kinda cheesy. Second is your attitude. Third, you need to not try so hard.

And I'm sure he'll go crying in his bed where his two girls wait for him.


LOL 

This put such a cute image in my head.  My Lord is more likely to terrify the girls and come to bed laughing, but if he does end up crying, we will take very good care of him.  Though I am not sure that jade was speaking to him even though her post was in reply to his.

*edited to add... how are you holding up with the ice storm, LA?  Hopefully you have not lost power.

Knight's kyra

< Message edited by kyraofMists -- 1/18/2007 4:23:18 PM >

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 93
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/18/2007 4:35:14 PM   
wyldsubmissive


Posts: 157
Joined: 5/7/2005
Status: offline 		Honestly it's hard to find them because at their age (and mine, 19) they're still figuring themselves out. Frankly ones is not settled 'til 30 in my opinion. That does not, however, mean that you cannot be mature about your exploration. Others go "teehee I'm a sub, slave, dom". I received a message from a 19 year old who calls himself a dom because quote "i came here to find a slave cuz im a big dom.  I know what I like,I know what I liked oing. all im claiming.  Ive always dated older woman so when i was about 16 i had a sub girlfriend. she introduced me to it and ever since then ive loved controlling in the bedroom." Needless to say I laughed.

Toodles!

Wyld

(in reply to kyraofMists)
Profile   Post #: 94
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/18/2007 4:38:01 PM   
Invictus754


Posts: 521
Joined: 12/16/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

Their mentors raped and killed them all..

D.G.


Wouldn't that make them - tormentors? 
 
LOL!

_____________________________

You never know your limits, until you push them
If slavery is a gift, the Africans were pretty fucking generous in the 1700 and 1800s, weren't they?

(in reply to domiguy)
Profile   Post #: 95
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/18/2007 4:39:11 PM   
justanotheclaire


Posts: 113
Joined: 8/15/2006
From: cambs, uk
Status: offline 		im 24 and been in the scene since i turned 20 it took a long time to prove i firstly was really a 20 yr old female and then secondly that i wasnt looking for a kinky shag.  now im treated by those who know me and my privious partners  just like every one else.

_____________________________

Bound by desire
Free through submission


(in reply to wyldsubmissive)
Profile   Post #: 96
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/18/2007 6:53:53 PM   
DominaSmartass


Posts: 961
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: This month? Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: justinasamerk

3)from a young  female perspective guys 25 and under are SOOOOO immature...*shrugs*


That's *exactly* why I chose to go with a 26 year old.

_____________________________

“These S&M people ... they are bossy! There’s also a creepy connection between leather sex, ‘Star Trek’ and the Renaissance Faire.”

- Comedian Margaret Cho

(in reply to justinasamerk)
Profile   Post #: 97
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/18/2007 8:07:43 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kyraofMists
*edited to add... how are you holding up with the ice storm, LA?  Hopefully you have not lost power.

Knight's kyra

Hardly anyone lost power, and then not for long.  Austinites are wusses when it comes to winter weather :)  I was able to enjoy my continued tradition of doing serious house cleaning on my days off...and went to the gym.

All is melted and just kinda wintry cold now though.

Some awesome pics are up though, if you want to check it out:
http://emeraldliz.livejournal.com/165582.html

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to kyraofMists)
Profile   Post #: 98
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/18/2007 8:46:29 PM   
whisperedsighs


Posts: 349
Joined: 11/12/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: asassylilslave

Just a guess but perhaps...just perhaps it's your profile that is scaring them all away


I actually like his profile...but I am well over 25....

I don't know about the statistics and submissives under 25, but I wish you luck in your quest.

_____________________________

oh my god that was so wrong! .... again please!

(in reply to asassylilslave)
Profile   Post #: 99
RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under... - 1/19/2007 4:26:03 PM   
DemonSadist


Posts: 45
Joined: 1/16/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dancingjade

Youre striking out for a variety of reasons. First your screename is kinda cheesy. Second is your attitude. Third, you need to not try so hard.




Well I'd agree on the screen name. But not really sure why you think I have an attitude, I'm not insulting anyone or being a prick about things. As for trying so hard, I don't know why you think I'm trying hard, all you really know about how hard I'm trying is that I made a profile on collarme.

(in reply to dancingjade)
Profile   Post #: 100
Page:   <<   < prev  3 4 [5] 6 7   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Why is it so hard to find genuine sub females under 25? Page: <<   < prev  3 4 [5] 6 7   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.078