Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your Mistress cry?

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Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your Mist... - 4/6/2007 12:18:26 AM

SusanofO

Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
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This question is for male submissives, but if Mistresses want to answer as well, feel free to do so, please.

I am just curious about whether it would bother a male submissive to see his Mistress crying.

If you did see her crying, what would you want to do about it? Anything?

Or would it completely turn you off?

Just wondering.

Thanks for any replies.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 4/6/2007 12:21:15 AM >

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

Post #: 1

RE: Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your ... - 4/6/2007 12:42:50 AM

pixelslave

Posts: 1444
Joined: 8/19/2006
Status: offline

Hi Susan!
Yes it would bother me! It would bother me a great deal, but not in the sense of any concerns about her dominance as my Mistress! Instead, I would be worried that something had upset my Mistress and I'd want to do whatever I could to help her deal with what had upset her and do something to change the situation to make it better for her if I could!

If she needed a shoulder to cry on as she grieved, someone to listen to her vent, share a sad story with, or unload unpleasant news that she'd just received, I'd want to be there for her and give her my undivided attention as she did. I'd offer what advice I could, or simply listen if that was what was required for the particular situation. If there was more I could do, such as brainstorming or researching a solution to her problem, I'd do that too! At any rate, the bottom line is that I'd want to help. After all, as her submissive, I'm there in part to make her life easier. So, unless instructed otherwise, that would naturally be part of my job.

In short, I'd be concerned about my Mistress if I saw her crying and would only want to help make things better for her.

- pixel

_____________________________

Chivalry isn't dead! It's for those who have it in their hearts & are willing to be taught. It's a way of life, a code of honor; this one's armor still needs some polishing!

(in reply to SusanofO)

Post #: 2

RE: Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your ... - 4/6/2007 12:43:14 AM

SLAVEBOY32

Posts: 122
Joined: 2/26/2007
Status: offline

It would crush me, I would do ANYTHING i could to comfort Her, find out what was wrong and fix it. If nothing i could do to fix it, at least be there for Her, in any capacity that would make a time like that a little easier on Her. Would it turn me off, hell no. I'd feel blessed because she had let me "in" that much more, our relationship would probably reach a deeper level. She trusted me, confided in me, felt comfortable enough with me to show this side to me during a time of need when she could have told me to go and gotten through it on Her own or gotten through it with someone else.

(in reply to SusanofO)

Post #: 3

RE: Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your ... - 4/6/2007 12:49:25 AM

SusanofO

Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
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This is good to hear. I was concerned somewhat that female Dominants might be expected to be invulnerable, and although I do think I am somewhat dominant, I am not invulnerable. Thanks for the feed-back, guys - it is appreciated.

- Susan

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to SLAVEBOY32)

Post #: 4

RE: Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your ... - 4/6/2007 12:52:15 AM

canupleaseme

Posts: 775
Joined: 7/9/2006
Status: offline

Having recently had a shitty few days and sat bawling and my boy seeing me I can say mine hates it and it made him cry !!!!
I goes both ways I hated seeing him cry too. Not including that situation (crying was justyfied) I hate if he sees me cry, I worry he will think i'm weak. Not that I cry a lot sometimes pmt and being a single parent can make you cry buckets when your tired and fazed out. I try not to let him see me like that because I know it makes him sad and I dont want to look mardy.
On the occasions that he has seen me like that though he has always been attentive and soothed me, just with tears in his eyes !!!

_____________________________

Proud mistress

(in reply to SLAVEBOY32)

Post #: 5

RE: Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your ... - 4/6/2007 12:58:00 AM

SusanofO

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Joined: 12/19/2005
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That is so sweet, he sounds like a true jewel. Not that I like seeing people suffer, but it must be reassuring to know someone is so much on your side.

Yes, I too, worry about appearing to be a big "wuss" if I cry in front of a male submissive. But, I am an emotional person, I even cry at sad movies, so I am not sure what, if anything, I will be able to do about it.

Thanks for the reply.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 4/6/2007 1:00:56 AM >

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to canupleaseme)

Post #: 6

RE: Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your ... - 4/6/2007 1:17:43 AM

canupleaseme

Posts: 775
Joined: 7/9/2006
Status: offline

Thanks Susan he is a treasure

But I'm with you on that front I do worry I will look really vunrable and i'm so not at all that I avoid crying if I can help it :)

_____________________________

Proud mistress

(in reply to SusanofO)

Post #: 7

RE: Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your ... - 4/6/2007 1:43:52 AM

SusanofO

Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline

I've usually had the impression that most men just don't know what to do when a woman cries. That is part of the reason I asked the question. I don't want to upset them if I did. It's nice when men try to be comforting, but I sometimes think some of them would rather you didn't do it at all (I am not referring to male submissives.
I don't have enough experience w/male subs to even know if that would be true)- but sometimes, I just can't seem to help it.

I think maybe they take it more seriously than need be, although it is nice to know men care. Maybe that's just my own particular situation, though. I mean, sometimes something really is drastically wrong, and that is why I'd be crying - in which case, I'd take all of the comforting I could get, maybe, although I'd try to "keep it together" and not dwell in it, either.

Other times, it might be just that I saw something really sad on tv, and it's not a huge deal, and maybe just a hug would be nice, or even just no response at all.

I am really hoping this is not considered "un-Dommely" by a male submissive I'd get together with - because I am a pretty "together" person, and pretty dominant, even though I am a Switch.

This whole topic probably sounds not very "Domme-like" of me, perhaps (I dunno), but I am curious.

It was nice to hear the empathic responses from some male submissives, and know they care, and would try to comfort their Mistress, and wouldn't think it was really weird, or destroy altogether her "Dommely mystique" or something.

*It would be interesting to hear some more comments from Mistresses, too, about how they feel on this topic. As well as more male submissives-slaves.

I don't cry all the time, or even that often - but, I am an emotional person. I guess I'd just want to know from a male submissive that it was okay to be one. I suppose it depends on the submissive, too, though, as far as it bothering them.

I don't think that a female crying necessarily has to equate with her being considered "dependent" - does it?

I know it maybe shouldn't matter, but I don't want to potentially shatter someone's image of me, if they are going to think I am some big wuss because I cry at a sad movies, or am otherwise "emotional". It doesn't mean I am not "firm" in the bedroom, or other parts of my life, or with a submissive. At all. I am plenty "firm" in other areas of my life, IMO, and when I need to be.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 4/6/2007 2:21:42 AM >

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to canupleaseme)

Post #: 8

RE: Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your ... - 4/6/2007 2:31:45 AM

SLAVEBOY32

Posts: 122
Joined: 2/26/2007
Status: offline

I would not view it as a sign of weakness in the least. I'd be amazed if you kept a sub around that viewed it as that, seems immature to me for a sub to have such a view.

(in reply to SusanofO)

Post #: 9

RE: Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your ... - 4/6/2007 2:45:32 AM

SusanofO

Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
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Thanks much for the reply. This is reassuring to hear.

- Susan

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to SLAVEBOY32)

Post #: 10

RE: Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your ... - 4/6/2007 3:09:04 AM

ClandestinedOne

Posts: 91
Joined: 3/31/2007
Status: offline

I know whenever I see anyone cry, especially my Mistress, I start crying too, and will do anything, ANYTHING to help her stop.

(in reply to SusanofO)

Post #: 11

RE: Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your ... - 4/6/2007 3:13:28 AM

SusanofO

Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline

These replies are so reassuring to hear. Thanks for the reply. I am liking male submissives-slaves more and more, every day.

- Susan

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to ClandestinedOne)

Post #: 12

RE: Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your ... - 4/6/2007 4:08:02 AM

Samwhiplash

Posts: 191
Joined: 10/5/2005
Status: offline

Im not much of a crier to be honest, however I would expect any sub to remember that behind this Domme is a girl to his boy (as well as a D to his s). Stripped bare we are all creatures with emotions.

(in reply to SusanofO)

Post #: 13

RE: Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your ... - 4/6/2007 4:16:17 AM

SusanofO

Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline

Thanks for the reply!

- Susan

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to Samwhiplash)

Post #: 14

RE: Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your ... - 4/6/2007 4:21:06 AM

yobreh

Posts: 8
Joined: 3/29/2007
Status: offline

Yes it would bother me very much to see the Mistress cry!! As MsSamwhiplash put it "striped bare we are all creatures with emotions". If something were emotional enough to make the Mistress cry then it goes without saying that this servant would very bad and want to do what ever it takes to ease any pain from Her suffering. Belonging to the Mistress not only means physical ownership but also emotional ownership.

(in reply to Samwhiplash)

Post #: 15

RE: Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your ... - 4/6/2007 4:23:32 AM

KaramelGoddess

Posts: 404
Joined: 6/20/2006
Status: offline

Dear Susan,

Whenever I have burst into tears, the boy has as well, and even sometimes when he cries I do too. We're both really sensitive creatures and it bothers us when the other is in pain. It doesn't lessen the D/s between us, in fact it strengthens it. Our relationship is about love first and everything else is secondary. When I love someone...I cry along with them. Having said that, the boy will do *anything* to make Me smile when I'm in tears...and most times it works.

Thanks for a good post,
With kind regard,
~Kara

_____________________________

"Never eat more than you can lift." ~ Miss Piggy

(in reply to SusanofO)

Post #: 16

RE: Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your ... - 4/6/2007 5:58:30 AM

Unrepentant1

Posts: 283
Joined: 8/25/2006
Status: offline

If you care and love someone of course it would bother me, but only because she was upset. I would want to comfort her, understand what has upset her and what I could to help her.

(in reply to KaramelGoddess)

Post #: 17

RE: Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your ... - 4/6/2007 6:49:26 AM

onestandingstill

Posts: 1335
Joined: 8/3/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SusanofO

This is good to hear. I was concerned somewhat that female Dominants might be expected to be invulnerable, and although I do think I am somewhat dominant, I am not invulnerable. Thanks for the feed-back, guys - it is appreciated.

- Susan

Hmmmm interesting turn of events for you Susan.
Good luck opening up your mind to the things you enjoy and what new wonderful things you'll discover about yourself along the way.
suzanne

(in reply to SusanofO)

Post #: 18

RE: Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your ... - 4/6/2007 6:57:07 AM

lockedaway

Posts: 1720
Joined: 3/15/2007
Status: offline

Yes, it would bother me a great deal to see my Mistress cry. Everyone has a vulnerable side and Her crying is not a sign of weakness nor is it a lack of dominance. A sub should be able to be supportive and nuturing and not forget his/her place simply because they may be the strong one for the moment.

(in reply to onestandingstill)

Post #: 19

RE: Male subs/slaves - would it bother you to see your ... - 4/6/2007 7:05:05 AM

Lashra

Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline

I asked my sub this and he said he would hold me and comfort me. He would try to find out why I was crying and remedy the situation if he could. If I told him to leave me alone, he would of course do so.

In all honesty if he saw me cry it would really upset him, he can't stand to see me unhappy. It just tears at his heart.

~Lashra

_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”

(in reply to SusanofO)

Post #: 20

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