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Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 3:27:15 PM   
notlooking2


Posts: 53
Joined: 3/17/2007
Status: offline 		Hi all, I'm pretty sure I know the answer to this.  However, I would love to hear the opinion of others.  Should I be careful with a Dom who wants to have sex on the second date?  His reasoning being "So he can get the sexual frustrations out of the way and can concentrate on being a Master".

Thanks in advance for all of your replies.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 3:28:54 PM   
bandit25


Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline 		Are you kidding me?  Yes, you know the answer..why ask?

(in reply to notlooking2)
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RE: Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 3:32:11 PM   
SirDominic


Posts: 711
Joined: 11/22/2006
Status: offline 		Hi not,

Your instincts are just fine. What a load of crap. Although sex is not part of the D/s experience for everyone, for many it is intimately involved (no pun intended). It's not something a Dom would want to "get out of the way".

Namaste, Sir Dominic

_____________________________

You teach best what you have lived.

(in reply to notlooking2)
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RE: Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 3:34:37 PM   
MrDiscipline44


Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline 		Look, people will blow smoke up your ass on this subject but here's a simple fact. This "lifetsyle" isn't any different then any other. So you have to ask yourself would you fuck'm if you weren't in the lifestyle. If not, why would you start now?

_____________________________

If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

(in reply to notlooking2)
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RE: Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 3:34:58 PM   
HutchGarahl


Posts: 562
Joined: 1/10/2007
Status: offline 		Can't for the life of me think as to why one would want to go ahead and get the sex out of the way. Makes it sound too much like an unliked job. Not sure about others, but for myself and I know for some others...taking it gradually to sex makes it all that much more exciting. Stick with your instincts hun....otherwise you may be biting off more than you would care to eat.

(in reply to SirDominic)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 3:37:50 PM   
spanklette


Posts: 882
Joined: 2/22/2005
Status: offline 		Well, the question actually has more merit than I think I gave it at first glance.
 
First of all, I'm not one for waiting a specified amount of time to have sex...if the chemistry is there and I feel good about it, why not?
 
I just find his reasoning to be the equivalent of the often repeated high school phrase, "But, I'll get blue balls and it'll hurt me if we don't."
 
Sex on the second date is fine, as long as you're fine with it...I just don't follow his reasoning.

< Message edited by spanklette -- 4/13/2007 3:38:31 PM >

_____________________________

~spanklette~

"The important thing is this: to be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become. " Charles du Bois

"Please don't shout, can't you see I'm not listening." Billie Myers

(in reply to notlooking2)
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RE: Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 3:39:42 PM   
notlooking2


Posts: 53
Joined: 3/17/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: bandit25

Are you kidding me?  Yes, you know the answer..why ask?


Yes, I did know the answer.  Thanks for all your replies.  And to answer your question why I would even ask.  After looking for 4 years, a girl get's to doubt herself every now and then.

Thanks again

(in reply to bandit25)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 3:42:05 PM   
countrygirl69


Posts: 36
Joined: 12/1/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MrDiscipline4. So you have to ask yourself would you fuck'm if you weren't in the lifestyle. If not, why would you start now?


I have  to agree if you were dating  in the vanilla world and you would do that its your life but I have the feeling its not you and dont let anyone talk you into doing something is totally against your nature  he may be a Dom but he isnt your Master yet

(in reply to MrDiscipline44)
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RE: Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 3:44:00 PM   
countrygirl69


Posts: 36
Joined: 12/1/2006
Status: offline 		wow spanklette those were my exact thoughts  even the high school thing

(in reply to spanklette)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 3:47:45 PM   
Kinkypupper


Posts: 713
Joined: 9/26/2004
From: Portland oregon
Status: offline 		sounds like a horney person who wants sex only

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Phil Moulton
A Sensual Touch
Locopony Racing
Portland Oregon

(in reply to notlooking2)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 4:20:26 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: notlooking2
"So he can get the sexual frustrations out of the way and can concentrate on being a Master".


Oh Snap! I am SO gonna use that line. Think I'll get laid?

Master Fire - HNG tonight *chuckle*


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
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BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to notlooking2)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 4:26:42 PM   
notlooking2


Posts: 53
Joined: 3/17/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam

quote:

ORIGINAL: notlooking2
"So he can get the sexual frustrations out of the way and can concentrate on being a Master".



Oh Snap! I am SO gonna use that line. Think I'll get laid?

Master Fire - HNG tonight *chuckle*



*laughs* I wish you luck, and let me know how it turns out.

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 4:27:52 PM   
aldompdx


Posts: 538
Joined: 10/24/2004
Status: offline 		Such a person has failed to master their own sexuality. How could they possibly master your's?
One can only share that which they have already found and know within themself.

< Message edited by aldompdx -- 4/13/2007 4:28:48 PM >

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 4:30:09 PM   
Liiaa


Posts: 17
Joined: 3/29/2007
Status: offline 		I could be wrong here  but i dont think so...from what im learning about a Ds relationship is you need to build  a connectivity with the person a mutural likeing too them , agree on hard limits and where you Both want it to go..and most of all Honestly and Trust..as you will be in their hands.
and not to mention the taking it slow part.....this should not be a fast Track experiance for either of you

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 4:33:53 PM   
FukinTroll


Posts: 6277
Joined: 2/6/2007
From: Under a bridge
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: notlooking2

Hi all, I'm pretty sure I know the answer to this.  However, I would love to hear the opinion of others.  Should I be careful with a Dom who wants to have sex on the second date?  His reasoning being "So he can get the sexual frustrations out of the way and can concentrate on being a Master".

Thanks in advance for all of your replies.


What we don't know is what the dynamic is.
Where the relationship is heading.
How much interaction you have had online, on phone, on cam, etc...

Answer those and you are going to get sum friggen awesome answers!

_____________________________

I'm the guy your girl is thinking about when she is fucking you!

TrollTopia
Greedy Groupie!

The Mods have me on speed Spank!! Gotta luv'em.

(in reply to notlooking2)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 4:35:14 PM   
FukinTroll


Posts: 6277
Joined: 2/6/2007
From: Under a bridge
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam

quote:

ORIGINAL: notlooking2
"So he can get the sexual frustrations out of the way and can concentrate on being a Master".


Oh Snap! I am SO gonna use that line. Think I'll get laid?

Master Fire - HNG tonight *chuckle*



Oh hell MFM, you just show up and your getting laid.

Slurp!

_____________________________

I'm the guy your girl is thinking about when she is fucking you!

TrollTopia
Greedy Groupie!

The Mods have me on speed Spank!! Gotta luv'em.

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 4:38:51 PM   
notlooking2


Posts: 53
Joined: 3/17/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Liiaa

I could be wrong here  but i dont think so...from what im learning about a Ds relationship is you need to build  a connectivity with the person a mutural likeing too them , agree on hard limits and where you Both want it to go..and most of all Honestly and Trust..as you will be in their hands.
and not to mention the taking it slow part.....this should not be a fast Track experiance for either of you


Thank you for your reply.... that is so what I am thinking as well.  As far as I'm concerned, a D/s relationship takes a lot of trust.  And trust is not achieved in 2 dates.  I'm glad to see other's out there who have the same ideas as I do.   And nothing against sex, but if I just wanted to get laid, there is always the local bar.

< Message edited by notlooking2 -- 4/13/2007 4:46:50 PM >

(in reply to Liiaa)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 4:45:05 PM   
notlooking2


Posts: 53
Joined: 3/17/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FukinTroll

quote:

ORIGINAL: notlooking2

Hi all, I'm pretty sure I know the answer to this.  However, I would love to hear the opinion of others.  Should I be careful with a Dom who wants to have sex on the second date?  His reasoning being "So he can get the sexual frustrations out of the way and can concentrate on being a Master".

Thanks in advance for all of your replies.


What we don't know is what the dynamic is.
Where the relationship is heading.
How much interaction you have had online, on phone, on cam, etc...

Answer those and you are going to get sum friggen awesome answers!


That's a valid question.  We've been communicating mostly with emails over the last month, gone out to Dinner once.  I'm currently getting ready for a national exam, so my time has been limited.  He has mentioned that once I've completed my studies we would need to spend more time together. To which I agree.  What also raises the red flag is the fact that he doesn't have any questions for me when we communicate in IM.  Wouldn't you have a ton of question for someone if you're truly looking for a commited M/s relationship?

(in reply to FukinTroll)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 4:51:34 PM   
FukinTroll


Posts: 6277
Joined: 2/6/2007
From: Under a bridge
Status: offline 		Methinks he wants to wet his winky and that will be about the end of it. So if didleing is on your agenda, there ya go!
 
I generally spend about a month in c-mail and if I am comfortable I will give out my IM. Eventually we will get to the phone and start working to a meet. I move slow and carefully because I am here for a commitment and there is a lot to absorb and factor in.

_____________________________

I'm the guy your girl is thinking about when she is fucking you!

TrollTopia
Greedy Groupie!

The Mods have me on speed Spank!! Gotta luv'em.

(in reply to notlooking2)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Immediate sex? - 4/13/2007 4:51:35 PM   
BRNaughtyAngel


Posts: 1821
Status: offline 		This applies to a lot of things in D/s relationship, but don't do anything YOU are not comfortable with or ready for.  I understand about the self doubts, but think of it this way.  Wouldn't you rather wait till you get to know each other better and the trust is built further...... and know he's with you because you are you?  Rather than taking the plunge for the reason he stated and you wake up to realize that he just wanted a quick lay or he goes poof and no more contact? 

It happens.  Not saying that's what will happen with your situation.  But if you are not ready to have sex with him, or have concerns, then don't do it.  You have to look out for you.

There are risks involved in anything we do - so if you're willing to take the risk, then do it.

Good luck in whatever decision you make!

(in reply to notlooking2)
Profile   Post #: 20
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