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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/10/2007 8:39:50 PM   
tag8833


Posts: 67
Joined: 7/1/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: chellekitty
PS...on the Kansas issue i vote for killing yourself too....something about a state where they've never seen a dog bigger than Toto.

Kansas here.  I have always had dogs that weigh in well above 100 lbs.  1 Saint Bernard and 2 Great Pyrenees, and a pile of mutts. 
 
Anyways, as bad as Kansas may seem due to it being one of the most religious states in America, it is worth mentioning that Kansas usually leads the nation in number of abortions performed.  This is because, while we do have religious people, they are less inclined to go crazy and say burn down the house of someone into BDSM.  There isn't the lynch mentality that you might find in the southeast.   Also there is less of an inclination to enact extreme laws to restrict behavior. 
 
My guess is that the worst place would likely be Mississippi, Alabama, or South Carolina.  Or maybe it would be worse with lower population density like Montana or North Dakota.

(in reply to chellekitty)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/10/2007 10:05:02 PM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		He's not a Republican anymore!

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressNoName

NY is a bit of an oddity, too...

[snip]

We also have a Republican mayor who seems more than happy to continue the work of his predecessor.

(in reply to MistressNoName)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/10/2007 10:49:11 PM   
SirButchTX


Posts: 29
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		I live in Fort Worth and the scene up here is fairly active. Between Dallas, Ft. Worth and the people that come from LA, OK, and AK as well as Texans...we've usually got a full house at Sanctuary. I'm proud to be a part of it.

SirButchTX

(in reply to zumala)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/11/2007 12:33:20 AM   
Lewcifer


Posts: 126
Joined: 5/22/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CitizenCane
quote:

ORIGINAL: openmindedslave
i was talking to someone who thought their state was the worst for finding someone or  too prudish for an open Poly relationship.


Did they live in Idaho?


I live in Boise, Idaho... having moved here from California (Palo Alto) five years ago to semi-retire.  The quality of life here is much better than in Southern or Northern California (been there, done that), but when it comes to sexuality you might as well set your clock back ten years.  There's a small BDSM community in Ada County (which encompasses Boise), but it's rather stagnant and many of the members aren't very sociable.  Wish I could change that.


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(in reply to CitizenCane)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/11/2007 7:43:41 AM   
OO8OO88O8


Posts: 73
Joined: 9/13/2005
Status: offline 		I don't here much in terms of Pittsburgh. I have passed one dungeon. It just seems harder for a younger person such as myself to get in. So I just go to the events in the south east. Atlanta seems like it has a huge community. Florida has a lot of events as well with Bash and FFW not far in the horizon just to name a few.

(in reply to Lewcifer)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/11/2007 9:45:07 AM   
Grlwithboy


Posts: 655
Joined: 2/8/2005
Status: offline 		I divide scene time between MN, NYC and DC. And I find MN lacking nothing - who'd have thought? I think it's the Lutheran rural "WHY ask WHY tell?" attitude.


(in reply to OO8OO88O8)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/11/2007 10:05:11 AM   
astro1347


Posts: 13
Joined: 6/4/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

California is an oddity. We have absolutely some of the most open BDSM communities in the country. We have public clubs in San Francisco, LA and Orange County. Other areas tend to be somewhat prudish. San Diego for all of it's "surfer laid back-ness" actually is somewhat prudish even considering the large gay community and some BDSM community.

California also has some of the most sweeping "sex offender" laws. California's Meghan's Law lists: "Oral sex, not forced or with a minor", "Sodomy, not forced or with a minor", "Public nudity" and "Assisting in public nudity".  Any of these items can get you on the Sex Offenders list for life.

It's quite the dichotomy.


Being born and raised in San Diego I must say that you're spot on OsideGirl, San Diego is prudish. It also suffers from 'city envy', an entire metroplex with a communal inferiority complex. Throught out the county there's this general "why should we even try, L.A. has done it bigger and better" attitude.

And to add to your list of silly things that can get you onto the sex offenders list for life, If I remember correctly a few years back a"Public Urination" charge came with a "Public Nudity" charge (in order to get more $$ from you) which then got you on the Sex Offenders list. I don't know if they've changed that yet.



(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/11/2007 10:21:58 AM   
Trampler


Posts: 580
Joined: 12/31/2006
Status: offline 		Detroit's community is alittle better then I expected, though from what I hear there isn't a whole lot going on in the Grand Rapids/Kalamazoo area. (my last bf, a Dom, lived there.) My only real dispointment is that there is not alot of pagans in the bdsm community.  And though in general have found quite a few kinky people in the pagan community, most of them seemed to be alittle quesy about hanging out in bdsm community.  **shrugs**

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(in reply to astro1347)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/11/2007 10:48:24 AM   
Alumbrado


Posts: 5560
Status: offline 		Memphis has a good sized and active community, and great dungeon facilities, which keep a low enough profile that the bible thumpers have not goaded the authorities into going after anyone.
Moderately open gay community as well.
Nashville seems to be similar, very nice club, etc.

Unfortunately, most of the available CM members seem to be several hours away at the far end of the state.

(in reply to Trampler)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/11/2007 10:59:54 AM   
MissHarlet


Posts: 2728
Joined: 9/11/2005
From: El Paso , TX US
Status: offline 		I moved from the Boston area and there are lots of events there but no clubs that I know of .. there is a private dungeon in Hartford for memebers only.

I am in rural NM now and the closest " activities" are in El Paso or in Alb .. a 3 or 5 hour drive from me

YES I miss the events .. thus try to go back to Boston area for the winter Fetish Flea evry year.

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To be respected you must be respectful, to be loved you must be willing to love,
to be trusted you must be willing to trust.

(in reply to Alumbrado)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/11/2007 11:05:37 AM   
BossySSBBW


Posts: 132
Joined: 5/18/2006
Status: offline 		Louisiana is once again the last in line for participation. 

(in reply to Mystique567)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/11/2007 11:10:42 AM   
SlND3R3LLA


Posts: 118
Joined: 6/19/2007
Status: offline 		Indiana I would say ranks up there with the worst.  There really isn't anything I have found, not even a really good store.  If it wasn't for online, we wouldn't have any toys at all.
 
~sin, Masters hoosier slave

_____________________________

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To hell with diamonds, lube is a girls best friend ;)

(in reply to BossySSBBW)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/11/2007 11:27:35 AM   
jezzabelle


Posts: 391
Joined: 2/5/2005
From: Southeastern, MA
Status: offline 		i live in MA, and as MissHarlet said, there are plenty of private events and parties, but no clubs or dungeons.  The place in Hartford, CT is more of a swingers club with a dungeon play room than it is a BDSM club.  They also hold Fetish nights at certain clubs, but they're usually only once a month and often get bumped for other events. 

The only big event that happens here is the Fetish Flea twice a year. 

edited for a typo

< Message edited by jezzabelle -- 7/11/2007 11:28:59 AM >

(in reply to MissHarlet)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/11/2007 1:00:22 PM   
caught4u


Posts: 132
Joined: 5/25/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SlND3R3LLA

Indiana I would say ranks up there with the worst.  There really isn't anything I have found, not even a really good store.  If it wasn't for online, we wouldn't have any toys at all.
 
~sin, Masters hoosier slave


It's the same way here in neighboring Kentucky.  Couldn't even find a decent butt plug.  Maybe i could use my shoes since  i don't wear them anyway

(in reply to SlND3R3LLA)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/11/2007 1:08:21 PM   
Lewcifer


Posts: 126
Joined: 5/22/2007
Status: offline 		"Which states are best and worst for bdsm?"

A state of general intoxication is probably worst.
A state of euphoria and sub-space is probably best.



_____________________________

I am fortunate... My wife is also My friend, lover and slave.

(in reply to tag8833)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/11/2007 1:18:01 PM   
SirRober


Posts: 364
Joined: 1/2/2006
Status: offline 		Hawaii is bad to them BDSM is a chic/goth thing

(in reply to Lewcifer)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/11/2007 1:18:06 PM   
texancutie


Posts: 322
Joined: 7/23/2005
Status: offline 		Not sure if this is really lucky or not, but I live in Houston...and Texas seems to have a fairly large community all the way around.  There are active people in most of the major cities.  As for having open Poly relationships, I know there are people living them, but I never see anyone carrying big signs saying they are poly.  Most people tend to be low key about it, unless they are with other understanding people.  

(in reply to openmindedslave)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/11/2007 1:22:25 PM   
BOUNTYHUNTER


Posts: 9259
Joined: 2/5/2004
Status: offline 		CA,Texas,New York, VA,Ohio are some of the best,MY home state of WV ranks at the bottem..

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US going to hell in a hand basket/

(in reply to texancutie)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/11/2007 1:22:39 PM   
Stephann


Posts: 4214
Joined: 12/27/2006
From: Portland, OR
Status: offline 		Personally, I've found the BDSM community here in Austin, Texas to be much more active and involved than cities much larger in the north.

Stephan


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"The blade itself incites to violence" - Homer

Men: Find a Woman here

(in reply to texancutie)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/11/2007 2:01:40 PM   
lapresence


Posts: 94
Joined: 1/24/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Trampler

Detroit's community is alittle better then I expected, though from what I hear there isn't a whole lot going on in the Grand Rapids/Kalamazoo area. (my last bf, a Dom, lived there.) My only real dispointment is that there is not alot of pagans in the bdsm community.  And though in general have found quite a few kinky people in the pagan community, most of them seemed to be alittle quesy about hanging out in bdsm community.  **shrugs**


Weird, I got my start in West Michigan, and I would call it fairly active.  Which surprised me, as it's fairly conservative.  Of course it's not as active as Atlanta (my home now).  But I attended play parties, munches, demos, etc.  They wanted to find a public play space when I left the lifestyle for a bit, I don't know what happened with that.  I know there is a lifestyle B&B in Holland.  West MI is not the best, but not the worst by any stretch of the imagination.  Now the middle of the state kind of fizzled.  I didn't find much in Lansing.  Anyway, I thought MI could hold it's own. 

(in reply to Trampler)
Profile   Post #: 60
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