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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/12/2007 12:11:43 PM

masterdstar

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The state of being your deepest truest self and surrendering to either your Dominant or submissive self so you can recognize that image in the mirror as real.

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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/12/2007 12:21:40 PM

HardnRuff

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quote:

ORIGINAL: goodpet

SC actually has some wonderful kinky folks and within a two hour drive from the center of the state, Columbia, there are 6-8 groups.. T3WD, LOCK, CAPEX, are the three biggies..

Only problem is that all, most, of the folks there were couples. I had no trouble finding service/training/friendship/play.. but moved out of the area to find a someone for myself .

the DC area,, Lots and lots of folks... and lots of groups and meetings and munches and classes and Doms and subs and trainings and events and club nights and socializations and whew.. lots to do both bdsm and vanilla and did i say yet a lot of folks here.. Oh and me.. i'm here now too

NC. also has some great folks and booming kink .. Along with Capex and the ones listed above are TMG , LinX . Cloak , Hickory playground and Lafortress ..

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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/12/2007 12:43:06 PM

ExSteelAgain

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I lived in the DC area for 4 years and enjoyed the availability of bdsm groups. I now live on the border of GA/SC and enjoy the people here at luxurious warm weather locations with fantastic houses around the palms overlooking the cove as we play in a pool without anyone bothering us. It does come down to those you meet and if you are able to meet quality people because of your own assets, the better off you will be. Location is not a magic factor in finding others who will want to play with you. Bozette is Bozette, no matter where she is.

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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/12/2007 3:45:35 PM

teamnoir

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California rocks. Our police departments generally DO understand the difference between consensual SM and domestic abuse. We have cities like San Francisco in which public sex clubs are licensed. And we have Folsom Street fair, one of the top 10 street fairs in the world, and it's a leather festival. BDSM isn't necessarily better understood by the general public here, but it really is generally supported by the services that are necessary. All we lack is a progressive attitude towards sex for money, (as one finds in Canada or Australia).

Other west coast states aren't too bad, but aren't as good, imo.

Middle states in the US are touchy and go back and forth. Their actual laws aren't too bad, but they're pretty subjective. East coast tends to be pretty nasty bearing more legal resemblance to UK laws, such that consent isn't a defense against assault. (Witness spanner).

California is tops on my list. Northern California is basically the bdsm capital of the world. Second place imo would be Holland, some really good stuff in Amsterdam. :).

I've also heard up and coming things about Berlin, but I haven't been there myself.

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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/12/2007 5:55:14 PM

CelticPrince

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although California is my home state, I have traveled to many others and I still rate Calif as tops.

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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/12/2007 11:30:28 PM

chellekitty

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MisPandora

quote:

ORIGINAL: sfdrew

if you are a sub and you have a choice between moving to Kansas and killing yourself, ... take the latter. if You are a Dom and You are thinking about moving to Kansas i live in hutchinson....

i think Kansas must be in the bottom 5, if not the worst state.

Kansas has a welcoming leather community. Google the words WOOLF and leather camp -- the Wichita Organization of Leather Fetishes Inc is a nice little group that runs a fantastic educational event in the summer. They're pansexual, but really, the majority of the work seems to be done by a few gay men because, well, no one else does the work!

There's a KS BDSM org website out there...and there is an active group in eastern Kansas called ALEK. They have a page on one of the alt lifestyle websites.

There are also a number of other groups on Yahoo Lists concerning BDSM who indicate that they host parties and live meetings.

There is a dungeon in Wichita called Seb's Place that I've heard is well attended for parties.

And I'd be remiss for not mentioning Kansas City Leather University, whom I've taught for in the past. KCLU hosts excellent presenters!

Kansas does have a great leather community...one of my very good friends is living there now (too far away) but she has grown so much since moving to an area with such a thriving leather community...infact she was Great Plains Bootblack 2006 and went to ICBB...and i really really really want to go to leather camp but i can't this year (funds have to be saved up and i want to go to Beyond Vanilla) but i think if you asked the people there most would agree that they would rather pick up the whole leather community and move it out of kansas...outside of the community is very different...i guess you could say...

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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/13/2007 11:50:12 AM

etch121

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well in Rhode Island im still looking... but we are luck to have Mass ans Ct only a few min away.......

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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/13/2007 6:53:46 PM

sierraflowr

Posts: 59
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From: Northern California
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quote:

ORIGINAL: teamnoir

California rocks. Our police departments generally DO understand the difference between consensual SM and domestic abuse. We have cities like San Francisco in which public sex clubs are licensed. And we have Folsom Street fair, one of the top 10 street fairs in the world, and it's a leather festival. California is tops on my list. Northern California is basically the bdsm capital of the world.

Well define Northern California lol.

Northern is allll the way up to the Oregon Border eh! so. Redding has rednecks.. BDSM, well there are a few there. Chico has a few (at least they have a good munch) I run the Marysville Yuba City munch and we're not out of the closet yet though a lot on my list

::grumble grumble:: But above Sac there isnt even a public Dungeon!!! (and not really a 'public' one there ...) so the closest *good* dungeons are SF Citadel and Santa Clara Edges. (i hate the designation of 'Northern' California)

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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/13/2007 7:56:09 PM

sjacket

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quote:

ORIGINAL: caught4u

It's the same way here in neighboring Kentucky. Couldn't even find a decent butt plug. Maybe i could use my shoes since i don't wear them anyway

I know of groups in Ashland, Lexington and Louisville.

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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/14/2007 12:17:44 PM

wanttwobeowned

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Alabama here, poking my head up above radar...

We have 10 + active groups, 4 of them pansexual and the rest are SIG's (FemDom, littles, bondage, etc...).

The oldest group is based out of Birmingham and was founded in 1997. This is our 10th anniversary year!

We have adult toy stores, adult theaters, and fetish clothing stores. We have BDSM professionals (ProDommes, toymakers, and corsetiers).

On any given Saturday night, you have a couple of events to choose from. You just have to know the right people and how to find them.

Each night of the week, one group or another is hosting a munch for new people to come out and find out how to join.

BDSM education is the focus for most of the groups, but you get so much more when you join. The friendships I have forged in the past 5 years are just wonderful.

We do enjoy traveling to other states and attending events outside our area when we can. All in all, we are very happy with the choices we have here!

Great question!

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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/14/2007 12:40:34 PM

LadyMaraSedai

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looks like I need to move lol I'm stuck here in Arkansas where no one even has a clue what BDSM or D/s are.....

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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 7/14/2007 12:47:17 PM

MilkMaidDomme

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I have to agree with you. I lived in Little Rock for a number of years, and I was very disappointed with the community there. However, there does seem to be a large SM community in the Fort Smith area...

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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 4/27/2008 8:54:58 PM

Envisioner

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quote:

ORIGINAL: sublizzie
Minnesota has an active community.

Minnesota has a *kinda* active community. There are several dozen, maybe even a couple hundred kinky people in the Twin Cities - out of about 300,000. That's not what I'd call a vast proportion. We have one kinky nightclub, a number of small-to-medium interest groups; there certainly isn't much "hooking up" that I've ever noticed. So I wouldn't say we're incredibly active. From the impression I've gotten, Florida and California and New York, and even Connecticut oddly enough (well, it's *near* New York) are all bouncing. My suspicion is that the Land of 10,000 Lakes is just not populous enough for our subcultures to take off as much as they can in a larger city. Sort of a critical mass issue. (Then again, it could be this rock I've been living under....)

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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 4/27/2008 10:09:23 PM

wulfgarw

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North Dakota doesen't have too much in the way of BDSM. Fargo here has a fairly active small group, but as far as the rest of the state, a couple kinksters are far flung through out.

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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 4/27/2008 10:21:46 PM

SteelofUtah

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Holy resurected Thread Batman

Wow I was more surprized as to which places were said to have ACTIVE communities cause you would never see Arkansas as KINK Heavy.

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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 4/27/2008 11:41:51 PM

Leatherist

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Worst.

Utah.

Best.

California.

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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 4/28/2008 5:12:45 AM

Sandyshores29718

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Here in Nashville we have the private club The Mark. For those that might be interested they have open munchens that everyone is welcome to go to. Sir went and even joined the club, said it wasnt a bad place and neither where the people. i've heard theres a small comm here though. It sucks though if your looking for toys or clothes. *shakeshead*

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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 4/28/2008 9:17:14 AM

DDraigeuraid

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quote:

if you are a sub and you have a choice between moving to Kansas and killing yourself, ... take the latter. if You are a Dom and You are thinking about moving to Kansas i live in hutchinson....

i think Kansas must be in the bottom 5, if not the worst state.

There used to be a pretty active group in Wichita, Topeka, and Kansas City. But it's been over 7 years since I was back there.

The Big Island of Hawaii is very slow. There are some kinky folk here, but not many. Only about 160k population on the island.
Dragon

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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 4/28/2008 11:45:30 AM

Dnomyar

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There is a lot going on in the michigan area. The Detroit area has several munch groups. From the middle of Mich down you will find lots of activity. From the mid section up there are a lot of lifestyle people but they are not organized. You can cross the river into Windsor, Canada. They have a nice group there. From Windsor to Toronto it is like northern Mich. lots of scattered.people but no groups.

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RE: Which states are best and worst for bdsm? - 4/28/2008 12:38:44 PM

DragonLady5

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressNoName

NY is a bit of an oddity, too...

We have a lot going on here...and I mean a LOT. We've got every kinda group/club for just about every need and we have some great people here doing really great work in the community. But we also only have one public dungeon and it's privately owned. We had two play spaces in Brooklyn until fairly recently, but they went belly-up...And before I could even get to either of them. We also have a Republican mayor who seems more than happy to continue the work of his predecessor...although I personally suspect he's got a thing for nipple clamps! But, that makes for a not-so-accepting political climate around here. Most people in NYC generally accept most of the things they see on a daily basis...and in general people don't care about body piercings and blue hair and tattoos all over...they're not so comfy with the idea of their next door neighbor's husband going around in diapers...but then again, they're not likely to call a cop or the men in the white coats either b/c they really don't give that much of a damn.

So, all-in-all, NY is a cool place to be in terms of finding your kinky niche...but it's got it's faults as well.

I hear that there is a lot of good stuff going on in Florida!

MNN

Forgot to mention the cost of things here. One of the reasons our dungeons and clubs are disappearing is b/c rents are so astronomically high here...I mean, like you would not believe...and new start ups really have the odds stacked against them. So we are trying so hard to just hold onto what we've got.

I'm in Upstate NY and there's slim to nothing here.

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