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you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 4:34:04 AM

leakylee

Posts: 747
Joined: 7/2/2004
Status: offline

so i thought about sticking this in 'Ask a submissive'. then i thought about 'Ask a switch'. then i thought i dont have a bloody clue. now i know that i am not the only one. yeah yeah again with the titles and the 'where you fit' type fits... why is it such a HUGE leap for all the domly doms in the world to grasp that some of us lowly types might actually enjoy inflicting pain on others, not like it is a mutually exclusive club or anything (as well as recieving it of course)? is there some sort of secret diplomatic expression that wouldnt be such a blow to those fragile type egos?

just curios..
lee

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I am so not right, that I left..

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RE: you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 4:41:51 AM

Dnomyar

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
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Why do you title yourself as a slave when obiviously your not.

(in reply to leakylee)

Post #: 2

RE: you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 4:46:38 AM

Goddess20

Posts: 73
Joined: 7/12/2007
From: Birmingham, England
Status: offline

My personal opinion is if you like both being submissive and Dominant then you are a switch.

It really is as simple as that.

But if you really wanna get into it then being a sub or a Domme hasn't really got anything to do with inflicting pain.

If you like inflicting pain, you are a sadist. If you like pain being inflicted on you, you are masochist. If you like both then you're a sadomasochist.

I think.

I've confused myself!

(in reply to leakylee)

Post #: 3

RE: you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 4:48:52 AM

leakylee

Posts: 747
Joined: 7/2/2004
Status: offline

because i have a sadistic streak that i enjoyed implementing.. that makes me not a slave? that is news..

thanks for the update..

just think i learned about the sadistic while serving.. gotta love revelations like that..

lee

< Message edited by leakylee -- 10/23/2007 4:49:22 AM >

_____________________________

I am so not right, that I left..

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 4

RE: you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 5:18:41 AM

Celeste43

Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline

You're a sadistic slave, nothing new there. If you folks play publicly, then the two of you can tag team some other bottom. He could tell you what to do and when and you could indulge your sadism while he still controls you. Or you could take a sub friend over to a spanking bench and go at it to both of your heart's content.

The only problem is if you are monogamous and that includes play. Because if he isn't masochistic, then he won't want to bottom for you. In that case, indulge your sadism by dreaming up predicaments and presenting these ideas to him for him to use on you.

(in reply to leakylee)

Post #: 5

RE: you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 6:07:57 AM

Rover

Posts: 2634
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline

Some of the most sadistic people I know are submissives/slaves. And it's not uncommon for ProDommes to be submissives/slaves.

These terms (and others) are not mutually exclusive.

John

_____________________________

"Man's mind stretched to a new idea never goes back to its original dimensions."

Sri da Avabhas

(in reply to leakylee)

Post #: 6

RE: you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 6:17:46 AM

GhitaAmati

Posts: 3263
Joined: 5/30/2007
Status: offline

Ive found that I am a submissive with some sadistic tendancies...I dont feel it makes me a switch.....

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I said I was a submissive, I never said I was a GOOD submissive.

Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good.
~Woody Allen

(in reply to Rover)

Post #: 7

RE: you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 6:36:12 AM

leakylee

Posts: 747
Joined: 7/2/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GhitaAmati

Ive found that I am a submissive with some sadistic tendancies...I dont feel it makes me a switch.....

that is it in a nutshell. i enjoy inflicting the pain, but have so desire what so ever for the control. it just amazes at the amount of doms that tend to freak..literally.. when you mention that.. touchy about the distinction for some reason..

lee

_____________________________

I am so not right, that I left..

(in reply to GhitaAmati)

Post #: 8

RE: you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 6:41:40 AM

Rover

Posts: 2634
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GhitaAmati

Ive found that I am a submissive with some sadistic tendancies...I dont feel it makes me a switch.....

I don't see how it would either, nor how people can be viewed in such a singular dimension. Humans are multi-faceted.

Terms such as "Dominant" and "submissive" relate to personal relationships, and I doubt very much that your sadistic interests also relate to your personal relationship (ie: they tend to involve someone else). In fact, those sadistic interests may not even require that you inflict the pain yourself... just so that someone does and you can enjoy it.

On the other hand, you may enjoy being a direct participant as a sadist. Some Dominants enjoy being bottoms. So what? No one term can possibly be an adequate description for any of us.

John

_____________________________

"Man's mind stretched to a new idea never goes back to its original dimensions."

Sri da Avabhas

(in reply to GhitaAmati)

Post #: 9

RE: you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 6:46:22 AM

LadyLynx

Posts: 1098
Joined: 7/24/2007
Status: offline

I think it's a natural progression. sometimes it does lead to wanting to switch. Does that it mean it changes who you are fundamentally? (particularily to your partner.) I don't think so.

_____________________________

Our community maybe openminded as a whole, but it is still made up of individuals who bring in their own opinions,baggage and agendas!

Known as SwitchWitch in my local community,and on IRC Bondage.

I also go by the nic SwitchWitch on MDS.

(in reply to leakylee)

Post #: 10

RE: you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 7:13:15 AM

chellekitty

Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

Why do you title yourself as a slave when obiviously your not.

wow...who titled you grand poobah?

as for me, i didn't title myself slave...many many others did, even when i argued with them about it...and finally i got someone to give me a reason against every reason i said i was not a slave....so i stopped fighting it....and i still love causing pain to other people...consensually...i especially like mind fucks...and they make me soaking wet....and the Daddy i am talking to loves that about me...and he plans on letting me do that with him....woohoo...

chelle

_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 11

RE: you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 7:20:53 AM

SimplyMichael

Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline

quote:

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

Why do you title yourself as a slave when obiviously your not.

wow...who titled you grand poobah?

Great sarcasm is often lost on the web dear, S A R C A S M....

(in reply to chellekitty)

Post #: 12

RE: you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 7:25:04 AM

chellekitty

Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline

how was i supposed to know he's being sarcastic, with the history of his lack of sarcasm? you can't go about changing the pattern of your humor and then expect everyone to figure it out....blah...

_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to SimplyMichael)

Post #: 13

RE: you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 7:28:00 AM

bandit25

Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline

Hey, I didn't know it was sarcastic either.

(in reply to chellekitty)

Post #: 14

RE: you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 7:30:12 AM

Gwynvyd

Posts: 4949
Status: offline

We all have many sides to our personalities.. and our selves.. I am weary of people who say " Oh no.. I couldnt possibly" when talking about even minorly taking control for just a moment in a situation, or giving up control. I thrive on flexability. I learned how to be a good Domme by becomeing a submissive first. I would never put my subs through something I would not willingly do myself first.. or had in fact already experianced. I know the safety measures, and what they are going to feel and possibly think much more that way.

Occasionaly I still like to bottom ( only to very very specific people and damn is it rare ) because I am still my little pain slut self.. and I need that outlet. As sadistic as I am... if I could find my match in that department I would be in freaking heaven. Does it make me less of a Domme? Nope. I just need my "whip me till you can't lift your arm any more" outlet.. LOL

Gwyn

_____________________________

Self avowed Geek-Girl~
Come for the boobs, stay for the brains.

Be the kinda woman that when your feet hit the floor in the morning the Devil says "Oh shit, shes awake..."
~ Softandshy's "Shiney"

(in reply to chellekitty)

Post #: 15

RE: you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 7:44:26 AM

RRafe

Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline

This is one place where not placing any emphasis on D/s can have it's rewards.

I think switches are cool-I just don't like to bottom or submit. At the same time,I'm not monogamous in play-just sex. I see PLENTY of couples out there who play with others at the local club-it's very fun. Why limit yourselves because someone else thinks you should play the game thier way?

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I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to Gwynvyd)

Post #: 16

RE: you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 7:50:24 AM

bipolarber

Posts: 2792
Joined: 9/25/2004
Status: offline

I've always had good luck with the term, "polymorphously perverse."

You might try "queer", but some people still think that it is a term you can only apply to GLBT....

(in reply to Gwynvyd)

Post #: 17

RE: you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 7:55:03 AM

Gwynvyd

Posts: 4949
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: bipolarber

I've always had good luck with the term, "polymorphously perverse."

You might try "queer", but some people still think that it is a term you can only apply to GLBT....

wow I am both! how cool is that?!

The first one is a bit wordry to trip over my tounge... ( just me and Gene Simmons ~ Freak accident... dont ask. I dont stick it out in public )
But I like the term!

Being Bi, Poly, Domme. ok with bottoming in the right situation.... I guess I am just a well rounded equal opertunity slut. *chuckles like mad*
~Although when they start bringing in the chickens, and weedeaters I might speak up. *snickers*

Gwyn

_____________________________

Self avowed Geek-Girl~
Come for the boobs, stay for the brains.

Be the kinda woman that when your feet hit the floor in the morning the Devil says "Oh shit, shes awake..."
~ Softandshy's "Shiney"

(in reply to bipolarber)

Post #: 18

RE: you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 7:56:38 AM

chellekitty

Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline

when anyone tells me "you're sooooo weird" i reply with "thanks!" and a big toothy grin.....

_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to Gwynvyd)

Post #: 19

RE: you think you are what again?!? - 10/23/2007 8:25:22 AM

TreasureKY

Posts: 3032
Joined: 4/10/2007
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: leakylee

quote:

ORIGINAL: GhitaAmati

Ive found that I am a submissive with some sadistic tendancies...I dont feel it makes me a switch.....

that is it in a nutshell. i enjoy inflicting the pain, but have so desire what so ever for the control...

It's interesting that we all have a little bit of a different slant on things...

I've never considered myself to be the least bit dominant so I've never thought of myself to be a switch or anything other than purely submissive.

Yet, I do enjoy seducing my dom. I love having free reign to tease and tempt him... to shower him with all sorts of pleasant sensations that tickle his every sense... keeping him on the edge of ecstasy for as long as possible, and even coaxing him back for more.

Some might consider that having control and perhaps it is, to a degree. Though, FirmhandKY always has the ultimate say in what I do and what happens. It's what I consider to be the defining element between us and what makes him the dominant...

He has the authority in our relationship.

(in reply to leakylee)

Post #: 20

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