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RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/16/2008 8:35:28 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		Why do you assume it is a matter of not being ready?  For some of us it is a choice we make for a variety of reasons.  My personal reason is because I don't think anyone belongs in my bedroom unless I invite them.  It always amuses me when people start crowing, I am into BDSM!!, as if they assume everyone needs to know that.
I dont' want to know what my neighbors do either.  But then I am one of those people who won't even read the enquirer.
Kyst

quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie
choices regarding where they want to be and what they're ready for.  Just because everyone isn't ready for or doesn't choose the same thing at the same time doesn't mean one choice is better than the other.  Whatever is right for someone at the time is what the best choice is.

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 81
RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/16/2008 8:48:06 PM   
nyc22m


Posts: 18
Joined: 12/12/2007
Status: offline 		yhea i would imagine location is a huge factor....lets say i was found out and word gets out to whomever dosent already know im a total pervert, nobody here is gonna care ....just yesterday i saw guy wacking off in a phone booth and you know what i thought? "who still uses phone booths" not "omg that guys fluging the dolphin in public".......but then again had that been a small midwestern town im sure there would have been a swat team involved.

(in reply to Missokyst)
Profile   Post #: 82
RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/16/2008 8:52:06 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		But they would have been more accurate in their spelling; I warrant. 

Small Town Guy

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Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to nyc22m)
Profile   Post #: 83
RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/16/2008 8:59:56 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

Why do you assume it is a matter of not being ready?  For some of us it is a choice we make for a variety of reasons.  My personal reason is because I don't think anyone belongs in my bedroom unless I invite them.  It always amuses me when people start crowing, I am into BDSM!!, as if they assume everyone needs to know that.
I dont' want to know what my neighbors do either.  But then I am one of those people who won't even read the enquirer.
Kyst

quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie
choices regarding where they want to be and what they're ready for.  Just because everyone isn't ready for or doesn't choose the same thing at the same time doesn't mean one choice is better than the other.  Whatever is right for someone at the time is what the best choice is.



Hey there, Kyst.

My error in wording.  I don't assume everyone isn't "ready." That's why I said "or doesn't choose the same thing."  But I was thinking of my own personal experience, in which for a long time I wasn't ready to tell those who are close to me about my personal relationship, because I hadn't yet come to terms with who I am.  I didn't mean to imply or actually say that this is the case for everyone, and I'm glad you pointed it out so I could clarify.  

I'm not one of those crowers you speak of.  My closest friends know my intimate, personal business, and others don't have a need to.  I'm pretty private about my personal life, and some have assumed that means I have something to hide as a result, which is odd.  But my experiences aren't everyones, and I didn't mean to give the impression that I think they are.

My overall point is that I wonder why people can't just accept that everyone's in a different place, rather than to think we should all be alike somehow.

Thanks for your post, Kyst.

_____________________________

Good is the enemy of great.

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Profile   Post #: 84
RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/16/2008 9:05:10 PM   
Vigilantejustice


Posts: 106
Joined: 11/15/2004
Status: offline 		The Army also frowns quite prominently on beating your wife, even if it is consensual. Hell, technically you're not supposed to do anything but missionary position! Loss of rank, dishonorable discharge, even time in prison can all be penalties if your chain of command is less than understanding.
-Corinne
House Vigilante
quote:

ORIGINAL: rulemylife

quote:

ORIGINAL: Asherdelampyr

what are they gonna do? get my discount at the leather store taken away? :P

as many flames as this might bring, I personally believe that there are only a few cases in which someone should legitimaly fear being "outted" (public people and so forth) though even that is up for debate




Come on! You can't be serious. I don't know what you do for a living but I can name dozens of careers that would be ruined in a heartbeat just off the top of my head.

How about your minister or pastor. Think he'll still have a congregation when his CM photos are distributed in his church. How about your local pediatrician? Think she will even keep her license, much less her practice when her patient's parents find out she frequents SM clubs? How about the local kindergarten teacher? What about the cop or fireman that is looking for a Domme? That'll go over big in the station house. Or the investment manager that has a large retiree clientele. Think they'll still trust him with their savings?

You may be open-minded, but the majority of society is not.



_____________________________

“Love begets love. This torment is my joy.”
"Those who are willing to be vulnerable move among mysteries."
"[Your work] is carved out of agony as a statue is carved out of marble." -All by Theodore Roethke

(in reply to rulemylife)
Profile   Post #: 85
RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/16/2008 9:06:55 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline 		I was once threatened to be outed by this so called Dominant once..seems he had difficulty with my saying that a relationship with him was not viable...So he threatened me with IM messages,phots etc and the fact that I am here on CM..at first I was a wee bit taken aback, I contemplated all the variables of being outed and decided that it was well worth not succumbing to his threats..so essentially told hime to take his best shot...then he would get mine...be careful who you try to poke they may poke back...straight through your heart....Tempting(great believer in live and let live)

_____________________________

I have greatly enjoyed the second blooming...suddenly you find at the age of 50, that a whole new life has opened before you.........Agatha Christie.

You must make tracks into the unknown~~Thoreau

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 86
RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/16/2008 9:15:36 PM   
Padriag


Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub

(great believer in live and let live)

Or live and let die... as the case may be.

_____________________________

Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to TemptingNviceSub)
Profile   Post #: 87
RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/16/2008 9:25:07 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Padriag

Or live and let die... as the case may be.


Now I'll be singing that all night... 

_____________________________

Good is the enemy of great.

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Profile   Post #: 88
RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/16/2008 9:28:16 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		That's so fuckin' 90's, ownie----------------

Sheena Ownie

My baby takes the mornin' train;
He works from 9 til 5 and then-------------

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 89
RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/16/2008 9:33:45 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline 		Sheena Ownie!! 



If you're gonna use Sheena, at least sing Sugar Walls or something fun like that.  We could get blackmailed for it. 

_____________________________

Good is the enemy of great.

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 90
RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/16/2008 9:34:26 PM   
FangsNfeet


Posts: 3758
Joined: 12/3/2004
Status: offline 		Go ahead and out me for being a member of CM or any other site. I can always deny that it's me and that someone else put my pic on there profile. Sure, the black mailer may have some IP address proof as well but no one is going to double check the info on that verification.

If you want something out of me, it's better to ask. Black Mail is not going to get you no where.

_____________________________

I'm Godzilla and you're Japan

(in reply to luvnchains)
Profile   Post #: 91
RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/16/2008 9:38:55 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		DWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDDDDEEE!

I don't mean to be rude, dude, but who is gonna snag your picture, you kinda look like a faggoty robert palmer girl and you can't spell, or am I the onliest one?

Darth Vader

Oh, LOL

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


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Profile   Post #: 92
RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/16/2008 10:04:24 PM   
BondageBarbieX


Posts: 495
Joined: 4/1/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

I dunno............

Ken might lay a yard or two out of the public wad to know what the fuck you been up to.



i love Your posts,if i was not collared i would be chasing You around mercilessly.

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 93
RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/16/2008 10:07:32 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		Are you threatening me?

I need some TP for my bung hole.



_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to BondageBarbieX)
Profile   Post #: 94
RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/17/2008 10:13:04 AM   
DaddyLongStroke


Posts: 1724
Joined: 12/12/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BossyShoeBitch

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

My ex-husband would use it against me to try to get custody of our daughter.  Not that I think he would win, but I don't want to go thru the time, the drama, the hassle, and the expense of the whole mess.  He is still angry that I got almost everything I asked for, so I'm sure he would use anything he could find to try to undo some of that.

Cali


That's why I had my ex join here..  Makes it much simpler on everyone..


I am sorry......WHAT????!!!??? 

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)
Profile   Post #: 95
RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/17/2008 10:54:34 AM   
ExSteelAgain


Posts: 1803
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Georgia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddyLongStroke

quote:

ORIGINAL: BossyShoeBitch

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

My ex-husband would use it against me to try to get custody of our daughter.  Not that I think he would win, but I don't want to go thru the time, the drama, the hassle, and the expense of the whole mess.  He is still angry that I got almost everything I asked for, so I'm sure he would use anything he could find to try to undo some of that.

Cali


That's why I had my ex join here..  Makes it much simpler on everyone..


I am sorry......WHAT????!!!??? 


LOL....you know I was wondering about that too. Glad you asked.

_____________________________

You can paint a cinder block bright pastel pink, but it's still a cinder block. (By Me.)

(in reply to DaddyLongStroke)
Profile   Post #: 96
RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/17/2008 11:04:53 AM   
BossyShoeBitch


Posts: 3931
Joined: 1/13/2007
From: South Florida
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

Are you threatening me?

I need some TP for my bung hole.



Arrrrre you Cornholio??

_____________________________

A clever man can get out of situations a wise man never gets into...
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 97
RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/17/2008 11:27:42 AM   
BossyShoeBitch


Posts: 3931
Joined: 1/13/2007
From: South Florida
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddyLongStroke

quote:

ORIGINAL: BossyShoeBitch

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

My ex-husband would use it against me to try to get custody of our daughter.  Not that I think he would win, but I don't want to go thru the time, the drama, the hassle, and the expense of the whole mess.  He is still angry that I got almost everything I asked for, so I'm sure he would use anything he could find to try to undo some of that.

Cali


That's why I had my ex join here..  Makes it much simpler on everyone..


I am sorry......WHAT????!!!??? 

Heh heh...  Ummmm... I meant to say that I encouraged you to join?


_____________________________

A clever man can get out of situations a wise man never gets into...
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

(in reply to DaddyLongStroke)
Profile   Post #: 98
RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/17/2008 11:36:38 AM   
ExSteelAgain


Posts: 1803
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Georgia
Status: offline 		I had an idea when I saw you were both from the same place that was the case.

_____________________________

You can paint a cinder block bright pastel pink, but it's still a cinder block. (By Me.)

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)
Profile   Post #: 99
RE: How many on here have been blackmailed? - 5/17/2008 3:17:40 PM   
Aiden


Posts: 39
Joined: 5/6/2008
Status: offline
quote:

as many flames as this might bring, I personally believe that there are only a few cases in which someone should legitimaly fear being "outted" (public people and so forth) though even that is up for debate


That everyone should be proud to be open about all aspects of themselves on all occasions is nice idea on paper but it doesn't interface with reality well.   I don't think not wanting to be outed is always related to shame or guilt.  The average person considers anything to do with Ds/bdsm beyond the limit; where homosexuality is seen as marginally acceptable, bdsm is several notches further down the abyss.  I'm pretty shameless far as accepting all my own dark twisty bits goes.  But it would be horrid to be publicly associated with bdsm first, because Im a very private person, and secondly, if it were to happen, from that time forward everyone would see me in terms of my bdsm proclivities being my defining trait. 



(in reply to Asherdelampyr)
Profile   Post #: 100
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