denimknight
Posts: 38
Joined: 6/19/2005
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ORIGINAL: denimknight
Ok, let’s be realistic here. If you are a Master and expect for ye random cute/handsome slave to pull up roots and come to you, eliminating the job they have already been trained at, spent time to establish contacts in, and may well be in line for a promotion with, yes you should pay them. I would say at least 9 months worth of their salary at the job they were forced to leave to come to you.
Excuse me? Forced??? I have yet to meet the respectable dominant who would "force" someone to give up a lucrative career to be a stay-at-home house slave. Everyone has a choice. If the job's too good, don't give it up and find a dominant who better fits your goals and aspirations.
I have never met a "respectable" dominant who would force someone to do anything (outside of the boundaries of the relationship of course). Note the wording I used "the job they were forced to leave." I worded it that way in order to make the distinction between the dominant themselves and the circumstances required to engage the dominant (over which the One in question may have no control). However, I have found many who make it clear that they wish only to engage with those who are local or willing to relocate. I can fully understand this desire (hell it's one of mine), but I sometimes fear that many don't have a firm grasp of the sacrifices they are talking about. Even worse many of those who are considering the prospect of pulling up roots to peruse a relationship fail to take into account just what they are undertaking.
What are worse are the dominants that have the gall to say that any that won't make the kind of sacrifices that come along with relocating to be with a dominant are somehow "less submissive" or something to that effect.
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Now many of you may see these requirements as being too much for anyone to deal with.
I'm wondering how anyone could have the nerve to demand payment to do something they obviously want to do. Pay me and I'll come, but if you don't pay me, I won't? Don't do me any favors!
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I can understand this, it’s hardly chump change. However, I think you must consider what you are getting in return. I’ll use myself for an example to illustrate my point. I plan on finishing grad school and heading into a job that pays upwards of 70K a year right out of the box. Now never mind that I’m hoping to do the kind of work where it’s the good being accomplished that matters, not the money, but in order for One to have me even consider dropping my existence to come and place myself in your hands You need to be able to put up approximately $52,500.
Good luck with that. Very few dominants are willing to "buy" a slave. They don't have to.
Again you seem to be reading want you wish to as opposed to what I wrote. This has nothing to do with paying someone to be their slave (it's illegal in many states). It's about caring enough about someone's well being over and above what they are to you now and into who they will and would like to become. In the case of helping a slave to minimize the long term damage of the sacrifice they have made to be with a dominant as it relates to their economic prosperity that means at least trying to recoup the lost wages.
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Honestly, this is a small price to pay to have someone with obviously marketable skills (to say nothing of the drive and focus needed to acquire graduate education, the same could be said of military training) drop their entire life and start a whole new life in a whole new place, a life centered around serving your wants and needs.
Yeah, but can you clean a toilet? All those alleged "marketable skills" are worthless in domestic service-type slavery. In fact, you could be in desperate need of training in that area, in which case it would be you who should be paying the dominant to train you in those skills. In the end, we all live with the choices we make. I would never have DREAMED of asking Master to "pay" me to resign my position and move to His home. I could just as easily have stayed where I was and continued my search for someone more local to me.
Actually yeah I can clean a toilet, rather well infact. See you've fallen into the trap of thinking that because someone possesses one set of skills then they can never gain an additional set of skills. This is highly flawed thinking, but that’s another discussion for another time. The simple fact of the matter is that yes as it turns out I can clean pretty well (don't always do so but I have the necessary skills for the most part). Since moving off campus (and thus eliminating the school meal plan) I've also had to learn how to cook. In fact I'm very proud of myself. This was the first week I managed to keep anything from catching on fire. I think that speaks to real progress on my part and I feel good about it.
I'm not going to go into the definition of marketable skills but in the technical sense house hold skills are not among them unless of course you are trying to get a job as a house cleaner. So in effect marketable skills are those which you are being paid for.
You may not have DREAMED of asking to be recompensated for leaving your former job. I have no choice but to require it. I'm a lot younger than you, as a result I am still in that very early stage where I am trying to build an economic future. A years worth of lost wages could be a serious set back for me. Nevertheless it would be one that for the right person I would be willing to overlook provided that they are willing to help me minimize the impact it would have upon not just me but also my kid (who comes before everything else anyway). The point I was making with my previous post is that compensating someone who has made some rather serious sacrifices to be with a Dominant is not so very out of the question, nor should that compensation cover just basic needs. It should also have the interest of minimizing the blow to a slave's long term future regardless of how long the contract with the dominant lasts or ends up playing out.
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In the end perhaps this matter is summed up by something a wonderful Dominatrix friend of mine once said to Her boy in the days leading up to their wedding: “Baby I love you more than I can hope to express in words, but if you ever fuck with my money, they’ll have to dredge the river for months before they find your bloated corpse.”
Well, at least we know where your, and her, priorities lie. It's all about the Benjamins.
See and we were getting along so well too, then you had to go and spit some nonsense like that. I'm looking to go into the public sector. I want to basically spend the rest of my life being paid WAY less money to work WAY harder than I would in the private sector. I am willing to make this sacrifice in the hopes of doing work that will have a real positive impact on people living in poverty in American cities.
I could have the nice car, big house, and all the trappings of wealth. I have chosen to relinquish a great many such things in order to do something truly noble and worthwhile with my life. I'd also kinda like to be able to send my daughter to college; I've got a feeling that might be important in the future.
If a Dominant desires for me to pull up roots that I might be with them then that Dominant needs to fully consider what they are asking of me (or any other slave for that matter). That was the point of what I wrote to begin with. I hope that what I have said here in response makes that intent a little more clear.
Now then: I have answered a rather snarky reply on your part with good natured patience and even some humor. However, your "It's all about the Benjamins" comment is quite simply over the line.
I find your accusation of materialism on my part both unjust and highly insulting. I would appreciate it if you would retract the statement.
Respectfully submitted
dk
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RE: living expenses - 
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