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ORIGINAL: Lockit
Oral sex is only liked when done well.  Somebody lashing a tongue down there with no clue is irritating and something one would avoid. lol

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ORIGINAL: ericpup

.  I also believe that we need to do those things together, but I do realize that for a healthy relationship, each member needs to be their own person. 

On another note, when I explained how I wasn't perfect, I wasn't trying to turn it around on her, again.  I allowed myself to become this person.  It was a personal weakness, and my fault alone.  I should have stood up to it then, but I didn't, and now it's my fault that it has become that way. 

I have many more weaknesses, or imperfections, if you will, but in the small space and time that I was typing, that was one glaring one that bothers me all the time.

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ORIGINAL: bluefireroses
…..Don't forget that in order to have a healthy relationship, each partner must be mentally healthy themselves.

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ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist
Dude, you married an alien.  All human females like oral sex.

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ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist
Dude, you married an alien.  All human females like oral sex.

GreedyTop:   Um.... no.

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Dude, you married an alien.  All human females like oral sex.

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ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

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ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist
Dude, you married an alien.  All human females like oral sex.

Um.... no.

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ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

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ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist
Dude, you married an alien.  All human females like oral sex.

Um.... no.

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ORIGINAL: OneMoreWaste

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ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

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ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist
Dude, you married an alien.  All human females like oral sex.

Um.... no.

But they do in porn!
But then again, all the alien females in porn enjoy oral sex too...

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She's already got a lawyer and judge (man hating Uber-feminists btw) lined up for the divorce to take everything, the bank accounts, the $50K SUV she 'must' have, the house, and even the dog, all before the wedding.  She alienates you from your friends.  Then she tries to burn the house down for the fire insurance.

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ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

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ORIGINAL: ericpup

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ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

^  dude, just grab some lube, get in the other room and go for it.  My girl was on a different schedule than me but she'd wake up when I went to bed and fuck me 5 times a week and then go back to sleep.  I was nice though, because she was asleep, I’d lick her awake until she’d cum.  Then we fucked and dozed right back off to sleep with a smile on her face.

If only it were so easy.  Last time I tried that, I was told, "Leave me the fuck alone, I'm trying to sleep."  Fuck, the last time I attempted to lick her, I was almost crushed by her knees.  She does not enjoy receiving oral sex. 

Guys, understand.  True story: One night I asked her if she wanted to "just make out, no sex involved."  She actually told me, with a straight face, that she was watching something on TV.  THIS WAS DURING A COMMERCIAL!!!  I understood she was watching a tv show, I wanted to make out while a commercial was on.  No joy there either.  Sex is just not in her top 10 list of things to do per day. 

Dude, you married an alien.  All human females like oral sex.

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ORIGINAL: ericpup

I should explain one thing.  I am only submissive in the bedroom.  If that does not make me a "true" submissive in people's eyes, so be it.  Outside of the bedroom, I believe in having my own time, space, job, friends, hobbies, etc.   

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ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist
Dude, you married an alien.  All human females like oral sex.

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Earlier on you said: "I allowed that to happen.  Worse, I embraced it, because I felt like I didn't have to do anything around the house.  Then, I guess she had enough."  She cooks, cleans and does your laundry for you. But you're submissive? But only submissive in the bedroom? Where your wife doesn't want to spend any time? I guess your 'Mistress' is tired of being your 'Mommy' and unless that's a particular kink of hers, is unlikely to make her want to fuck you anytime soon. 

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ORIGINAL: tsatske

I strongly suspect that it has a lot to do with the way in which you suggest sex - apparently, all the time. I don't blame you.
I suggest sex a lot, too. It might be down to about 15 times a day, now that my time with Master on work days is limited to an hour in the morning, (when we are already having sex) and 2 or 3 hours at night (when, usually... oh, never mind).

But, I am going to get bashed for this, but - read John Grey.
If you are hyper focused on sex, my advice isn't going to work, because you are going to change it subtly and fuck it up badly.
Be swwet, romantic, and - after a while of that, even gently and playfully physical together, without it being about sex. I suspect that the fact that everything you do and everything you say is focused on your acheiving your goals and getting your rocks off in your way is making her not want it at all. It's like making me eat all of my food covered with chocolate - I like chocolate alot, but, i'm going to get sick of chocolate.
She opened up to you and talked to you about finding a woman sexy. instead of just cuddling up and enjoying the moment with her, you jumped in - here's an open door! let's talk about me getting what I want!
and from your writing, it sounds like that happens a lot. can you just kiss her in the morning without it leading to talking about sexy? spoon her at night without trying to have sex?
Why does her liking different sensations than you make her cold? She does not like the feel of your cock being artificially vibrated. You do. So, in your mind, your 'right', and she is unsexual.
Sounds like she was sexual enough before you met her.
If I told you 'focus on her needs for a while', you'd say, 'I have. I want to know what SHE LIKES (you mean, what kind of sex...) what she needs ( what kind of sex)...'
John Grey says, one difference between men and women is, for men, sex happens in the bedroom. For women, sex is everything, everywhere.
It's the pat on the ass in the kitchen. It's the flowers you bring her. It's holding hands, talking over dinner.
(before I get attacked, yes, John Grey over generalizes. In particular, lifestyle people seem much less likely to focus on 'the act' as sex. But there are some truths in the generalities)
When was the last time you took her out for a cozy dinner, sat talking over candlelight, holding hands - and never mentioned sex? had no advance motive to get in her pants?
I suspect it has been so long that you will now have to do it repeatedly to gain back her trust.
She doesn't want to have sex with you because 'that's all you think about'. IOW, you make her feel like sex is the only reason you care about her.
Run her a bubble bath, light some candles, pour some wine and put a book by the bathtub, when she comes home tired from work. Then - leave the fucking bathroom. Go play Doom. Let her relax.
Watch a movie and snuggle, without looking for an opening in the movie to bring up 'the talk' again.
Serriously. It's not sex that is the problem. It is that you have made her feel like that is all she is to you. Get sex out of the equation until you win her trust back.
And go to councelling. What CC said.