RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom?

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RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 6:06:07 AM

sweetnurseBBW

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If you have things in common, are compatible things could work out. Age is only an issue if you make it one. Sure he has different life experiences than you but it doesn't mean you have nothing in common.

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(in reply to lilmisssubmiss)

Post #: 41

RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 6:17:02 AM

travelgman

Posts: 187
Joined: 2/1/2008
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Are you to young for him? No.

Will it work out the way you want it to. Maybe. You got as good a chance as any other couple. As someone said. I think the personalities will determine this more than your ages.

Something you both will need to consider though if you decide to pursue a real time relationship where your living together and doing all the normal couple things. A lot of the stress you encounter may come from sources you didn't expect it to. Which can really throw you for a loop if you let it. You may end up loosing friends ( on both sides) or at least having to decide if you want to continue spending time with them. Just because you two accept each other. Doesn't mean the people you currently trust and go to for advice will. And where you live also will factor into the amount of negative feedback you will encounter during your day to day life's.

But in the end. Any time you start a new relationship. Any of the negative things that have been mentioned can happen. So as long as you both want it and understand what is expected of each other. Go For It. Why pass up a chance at a good thing. Just because there might be problems.

< Message edited by travelgman -- 1/31/2009 6:23:43 AM >

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Post #: 42

RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 7:08:04 AM

JustDarkness

Posts: 1461
Joined: 7/25/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

Oddly enough, it's never been the 6ft tall, very protective, older brother, the even larger uncles, or retired military hardass dad, they had the most trouble with..........

talking about military hard ass.
One of my girlfriends brothers was a commando in the dutch army.
I remember looking up to him saying "you seem a good guy....if you harm her..you are dead" lol
Then I got the keys to her dads car. didn't know to cheer or to cry haha

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Post #: 43

RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 7:13:35 AM

OrionTheWolf

Posts: 7803
Joined: 10/11/2006
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If you two like each other and it becomes something more, then why would age really matter?

I am 19 years older than my slave. It has never been a problem for us.

quote:

ORIGINAL: lilmisssubmiss

I'm really interested in this 30 year old guy...he's unlike any other dom i've ever talked too...i really do like him . The only thing that seems to be getting in the way is the age difference..but in the end when i'm like 20 something and he's in his 30's do people even pay that much attention to age anymore?
what do you guys think?

I just don't know...............i really like him.

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(in reply to lilmisssubmiss)

Post #: 44

RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 7:19:20 AM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: lilmisssubmiss

I'm really interested in this 30 year old guy...he's unlike any other dom i've ever talked too...i really do like him . The only thing that seems to be getting in the way is the age difference..but in the end when i'm like 20 something and he's in his 30's do people even pay that much attention to age anymore?
what do you guys think?

I just don't know...............i really like him.

This isn't a matter for us.

This is only a matter on two levels.

First, legal. What is legal in your society?

Second, you and he. If he isn't interested there may be nothing you can do to interest him.

If he is interested he may have concerns about you being able to relate to the life experiences he's all ready had. You can help there but educating yourself about his life and the times he lived in before you were born.

Fox was born in 1980, I in 1969. The 1970s are my childhood, those foundational years. Fox took it upon himself to learn about the 1970s in many facets so he can relate to the things I say.

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(in reply to lilmisssubmiss)

Post #: 45

RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 7:50:03 AM

MistressLamia

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I agree 100% with LuckyAlbatross. I rarely am with someone my age so this has been my personal expierences with larger age differences. It starts off great but time shows you are from a totally different generation and that difference wears the relationship down. If you are both happy now be happy now. If it lasts that is beautiful. If not take the good things from it with you through life.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

The likelihood of you growing on the same path in the next five years is very very slim.

But it does exist. And who cares about five years? If it feels right now, then do it.

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It's not that I don't care about you. I just care about me more.

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Post #: 46

RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 7:59:20 AM

Amaros

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A Ten or Twelve year difference will not necessarily pose a huge problem for a long term relationship, age gaps matter less as you both get older, it used to be pretty common - women have an upper limit on fertility, whereas there is no age limit on male fertility.

At 46, I'd have to consider an 18 year old out of my range for anything but mentoring and/or fun and games - the usual rule of thumb is: is he/she old enough to be my child?

This rule get's broken all the time too, but Twelve years is under the limit for the most part.

(in reply to MistressLamia)

Post #: 47

RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 8:09:37 AM

oceanwynds

Posts: 1044
Joined: 8/24/2006
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My late husband was 15 years old then me. Age difference is one thing that cant be hidden. My parents stop talking to me for a couple years when I first started to see him. Though that hurt, I wouldnt consider hiding the fact that I was with him. Were there problems because of the age thing, yes but all were minor. Did it work out? Yes until death do us part. We made it work and hid from no one. It was what we both wanted. The thing too was I knew him a good year before I got totally involved. At that time, no my family didnt know because we werent in a relationship. We just were good friends, getting better all the time.

(in reply to lilmisssubmiss)

Post #: 48

RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 8:24:24 AM

CatdeMedici

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Make sure he isn't married.

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(in reply to lilmisssubmiss)

Post #: 49

RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 8:24:34 AM

lilmisssubmiss

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Joined: 9/29/2008
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Well my mother died...so i don't have to worry about her...
I know my dad will prolly not be thrilled..but he'd never ditch me in the end he'd always support me..

it's my older brother and sister who would be the hardest ..oh well

and i know he isn't playing me....if you read my journal enteries i know when something is wrong and this guy is sooo different.
Thank you guys it really helped to read all this feedback...it really did!

(in reply to oceanwynds)

Post #: 50

RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 8:26:15 AM

SadysticJester

Posts: 122
Joined: 6/24/2008
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as long as the chemistry is there,why should age matter. if you let others dictate things you miss out on the things in life that may or maynot make you happy.

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(in reply to lilmisssubmiss)

Post #: 51

RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 8:31:41 AM

lilmisssubmiss

Posts: 284
Joined: 9/29/2008
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Well exactly
I mean we even like some of the same music...we like the same tv shows/movies

we'd like to do the same things together...plus a major plus we our fetishes fit perfectly together..lol its crazy.

And the thing is...if he was interetested in something i wasn't because of my age or visa versa we'd both take the time to try to understand it and support it and at least have knowledge of it and respect it.

(in reply to SadysticJester)

Post #: 52

RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 8:34:52 AM

Amaros

Posts: 1363
Joined: 7/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: lilmisssubmiss

Well my mother died...so i don't have to worry about her...
I know my dad will prolly not be thrilled..but he'd never ditch me in the end he'd always support me..

it's my older brother and sister who would be the hardest ..oh well

and i know he isn't playing me....if you read my journal enteries i know when something is wrong and this guy is sooo different.
Thank you guys it really helped to read all this feedback...it really did!

The attraction of a younger women is that they are more, um... moldable, the whole dynamic of preserving female innocence in Christian social patterns is based on it, and it can create a very good dynamic - but, unfortunately, there are always going to be guys who will try to take advantage of this innocence and just want some clueless chippie on the side, players they call that, and it works for some, as long as you know what you're getting into, i.e., if you're a player too, otherwise, you're getting played.

(in reply to lilmisssubmiss)

Post #: 53

RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 8:51:34 AM

YoursMistress

Posts: 894
Joined: 12/17/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

Fox was born in 1980, I in 1969. The 1970s are my childhood, those foundational years. Fox took it upon himself to learn about the 1970s in many facets so he can relate to the things I say.

wow, you really got yourself a winner tammyjo! :)

lilmisssubmiss, since you are asking here for opinions I wonder whether it doesn't seem problematic to you. In my mind it's far more important how you feel, regardless of anyone else's opinion. If you feel in your heart that it's right, then it only matters how you two feel (subject to local laws of course, thanks tammyjo). Good luck sweetie!

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As a rule, I don't like to make general statements.

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Post #: 54

RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 8:53:36 AM

lilmisssubmiss

Posts: 284
Joined: 9/29/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Amaros

quote:

ORIGINAL: lilmisssubmiss

Well my mother died...so i don't have to worry about her...
I know my dad will prolly not be thrilled..but he'd never ditch me in the end he'd always support me..

it's my older brother and sister who would be the hardest ..oh well

and i know he isn't playing me....if you read my journal enteries i know when something is wrong and this guy is sooo different.
Thank you guys it really helped to read all this feedback...it really did!

The attraction of a younger women is that they are more, um... moldable, the whole dynamic of preserving female innocence in Christian social patterns is based on it, and it can create a very good dynamic - but, unfortunately, there are always going to be guys who will try to take advantage of this innocence and just want some clueless chippie on the side, players they call that, and it works for some, as long as you know what you're getting into, i.e., if you're a player too, otherwise, you're getting played.

lol he's not a player

he knows i wont be visiting him for a while and he'd want me to move in eventually.

and i get good hunches about people..hes not a player.

(in reply to Amaros)

Post #: 55

RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 8:54:39 AM

lilmisssubmiss

Posts: 284
Joined: 9/29/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: YoursMistress

quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

Fox was born in 1980, I in 1969. The 1970s are my childhood, those foundational years. Fox took it upon himself to learn about the 1970s in many facets so he can relate to the things I say.

wow, you really got yourself a winner tammyjo! :)

lilmisssubmiss, since you are asking here for opinions I wonder whether it doesn't seem problematic to you. In my mind it's far more important how you feel, regardless of anyone else's opinion. If you feel in your heart that it's right, then it only matters how you two feel (subject to local laws of course, thanks tammyjo). Good luck sweetie!

YEAH exactly
i just thinking seeing what other ppl say helps my scattered brain get in order sometimes so i can truly see how i am feeling.

(in reply to YoursMistress)

Post #: 56

RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 8:58:49 AM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

Imo, yes you're too young and he's too old.

You're just beginning your life. You should be out there enjoying your life, experimenting, getting to know what you do and don't like, etc...

He might be good for something short term but don't expect it to last or for him to be "The One".

Personally when I see older men going after young girls I think they're going through a mid-life crisis. Someone will get hurt.

But then I'm old fashioned.

(in reply to lilmisssubmiss)

Post #: 57

RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 9:02:03 AM

lilmisssubmiss

Posts: 284
Joined: 9/29/2008
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haha you're the first person out of tons of ppl who have said straight up no

haha interesting.

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 58

RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 9:11:25 AM

JustDarkness

Posts: 1461
Joined: 7/25/2008
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quote:

Personally when I see older men going after young girls I think they're going through a mid-life crisis. Someone will get hurt.

lol funny..I think they select eachother..not him..just selecting her. At least..I see this as a mutual thing ;)
So instead of midlife crisis it could be lack of a daddy? :P

(in reply to lilmisssubmiss)

Post #: 59

RE: is an 18 year old sub too young for a 30 year old dom? - 1/31/2009 9:13:01 AM

lilmisssubmiss

Posts: 284
Joined: 9/29/2008
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not really i have a daddy irl a great daddy

in no way would my dom be filling my DADS shoes

that's so fucking gross

(in reply to JustDarkness)

Post #: 60

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