quote:

ORIGINAL: Reflectivesoul
Its not just the intial looking different that makes people stand out its also the behaviours that they display as well. People can look over someone that looks different after a while, but the ones that act out of hand, those ones not only spread a negative cast one everyone else that can be lumped into the same class but also stick out like a sore thumb and make it that much easier for society to outcast.

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My Karma Account is huge, but I just can't seem to make a withdrawal!!

http://cinful.wordpress.com

(in reply to Reflectivesoul)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ScooterTrash

If you choose to wear a collar, cuffs, corset, whatever, in public, go for it. Don't do it for the reaction however, I think that is more self serving and detrimental if done just for shock value. But if it's just what you happen to appear like "that" at the time, don't alter your agenda to protect the general public either. Do be braced for the occasional hard stare or behind your back muttering, but perhaps if they see this type of thing enough times, they may get numb to it and not have any reaction at all. I don't see where this would have a negative impact on the BDSM community at all. If it offends them, them being the public, they already had negative feelings and were prejudgemental anyway, so by not hiding it away will likely not make things worse and perhaps just the exposure to it, will in a little way, make acceptance better.

quote:


My Karma Account is huge, but I just can't seem to make a withdrawal!!

http://cinful.wordpress.com

(in reply to ScooterTrash)

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But, you don't get to choose who represents BDSM. You may or maynot want the Goreans to represent BDSM, you may or may not want the Adult Babies, to represent BDSM...but you don't get to choose that.

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ORIGINAL: Reflectivesoul

I have seen you pick apart several posts like its some kind of personal thing where we are trying to say who gets to do what.

quote:


My Karma Account is huge, but I just can't seem to make a withdrawal!!

http://cinful.wordpress.com

(in reply to Reflectivesoul)

quote:

  won't apologize for disagreeing with your views, nor will I even expect you to change your views. But, just so you know, I won't stop responding to comments that I don't agree with. If you or Erin feel I have flamed you in my posts then you are welcome to point that out to the Mods.  

I also would LOVE to be shown where I am saying what is difinitively right and wrong... but I'll be glad to state once AGAIN that common sense and a bit of respect for people not in this lifestyle by not making them have to endure childish and otherwise immature antics while in public. I say the same thing about skateboarders that feel the need to pull stupid stunts on the hand rails in the city park.

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Personally, I feel that each person has a right to decide for themselves how they want to express their lifestyle in public, and that the rest of us have no right to tell them it's wrong (unless it's breaking the law). 

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ORIGINAL: Vancouver_cinful

If you or Erin feel I have flamed you in my posts then you are welcome to point that out to the Mods.

Cin

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Oh please do not include me in this current dispute.

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I have seen you pick apart several posts like its some kind of personal thing where we are trying to say who gets to do what.

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ORIGINAL: Reflectivesoul

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Oh please do not include me in this current dispute.

Sorry about that erin, I think that was kind of my fault for mentioning

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I have seen you pick apart several posts like its some kind of personal thing where we are trying to say who gets to do what.

that in an above post. Again sorry about that.

~RS~

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ORIGINAL: Reflectivesoul

How catty is that? *laughs* I thought we had all graduated grade school and were beyond the if you dont like me tell the boss?
 

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I merely pointed out that you seem to view posts as some negative connotation twords yourself, perhaps a guilty streak?

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I also would LOVE to be shown where I am saying what is difinitively right and wrong... but I'll be glad to state once AGAIN that common sense and a bit of respect for people not in this lifestyle by not making them have to endure childish and otherwise immature antics while in public. I say the same thing about skateboarders that feel the need to pull stupid stunts on the hand rails in the city park.
 

quote:


ORIGINAL: Reflectivesoul
I know several FemDoms that have taken their boys ( in full body latex gear and hoods )  to the gas stations to pump gas just to get off on the fact that everyone around was sneering or gasping or otherwise making some kind of display of disapproval at the "show". These kind of acts are NOT helping the BDSM as a whole and I think thats the meaning of this thread. Not so much which if you want to wear a collar or not, but the full decked out gear being taken into a vanilla world. Its wrong. If you want to do that and go to a club fine, most people are just going to be like ooooo anyhow.

quote:


My Karma Account is huge, but I just can't seem to make a withdrawal!!

http://cinful.wordpress.com

(in reply to Reflectivesoul)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

I said that because I do feel that you have taken my comments personally...but let me make this abundantly clear....you are as entitled to your opinions as I am to mine. I can not state any more clearly that my views are mine and mine alone and I don't expect you or anyone else to change your mind or conduct yourself any differently in your life as a result of them. I also want to say that I completely respect your right to have your views, whether I agree with them or not, and I am not so shallow as to view you with any less respect because we have an issue that we don't see eye to eye on. I believe that there are probably no two people here on these boards who see eye to eye on every issue, and you and I have probably just come to a place where we will have to agree to disagree and move forward. There are no ill feelings on this end and I certainly hope there are also none on yours.

quote:


My Karma Account is huge, but I just can't seem to make a withdrawal!!

http://cinful.wordpress.com

(in reply to mistoferin)

quote:

Many of us are passionate about our involvement in Bdsm, and would fight tooth and nail for our rights to be involved in it.  However, many are hyprocrites who use Bdsm as a scapegoat to prove themselves 'This is how I always act, this is who I am'.  Everyone does things at home that they have the common sense to not do in public.  It may not be illegal to belch loudly, pass gas, argue loudly with someone, sing very badly at the top of your lungs... but when in public, common sense sets in, and though you have a right to do these things, you don't do them.  

Spreading the word that Bdsm attracts stable, intelligent, sane people from all walks of life is not best demonstrated by unreasonable displays/scening at malls, restaurants, etc.   Then when courts and employers question our ability to behave as rational, capable  human beings who can hold down jobs, raise children, etc,  our case is 'proven' by looking at those who aren't socially responsible about their kink and we all pay the price.

Extremists in any forum are considered fanatics by most and are very rarely taken seriously at any level.  Perhaps more of us would 'come out' socially, if Bdsm wasn't so tainted by the socially irresponsible.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Reflectivesoul

thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you
 
*grins*
I'm so glad I'm not the only one that sees this.....I think you may just have a better way of putting it than I did.... but at any rate, thank you some more *grins*

quote:

ORIGINAL: Reflectivesoul

First off I never said "I" personally get to choose anything all I was intending is that people need to use some common sence if they decide to broadcast in public. If someone wants to wear a diaper out in public then more power to them, but just dont run over to a "Mommy" and try suckling her nipples at Denny's!