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RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 1:04:33 PM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline
quote:

How can i be a submissive if i only do what i want, when and where i want? The only places that i am ever at is either at home or at work. We have 2 week-ends a month where we are both off


I can squeeze lots of submission into two weekends a month.

(in reply to Stephanie72)
Profile   Post #: 101
RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 1:05:09 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		If this was true she is just as fucked up as him. I was only concentrating on him because my attention span today is short, but yeah I agree with your side as well. But she also should have looked before she leaped....if this was true. lol


_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 102
RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 1:06:31 PM   
Endivius


Posts: 1238
Joined: 8/22/2011
Status: offline 		PFFt. With the proper tools, a little imagination and a few hours, it could feel like a lifetime.

_____________________________

Basically if you can't inspire someone to trust you deeply, you aren't going to be able to buy that or a reasonable facsimile thereof. -DesFIP

(in reply to kalikshama)
Profile   Post #: 103
RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 1:08:13 PM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline
quote:

No credit for relocating based on her word that she would obey and that they wanted the same thing?


I don't buy that someone would bother to sell his house and move but not close enough that he could see his fiance regularly.

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 104
RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 1:10:10 PM   
Endivius


Posts: 1238
Joined: 8/22/2011
Status: offline 		I don't buy that they planned to get married but only had time to see eachother twice a month. Seriously? What kind of marriage can you have without a place together? Or maybe in chapter 4 of this trainwreck they planned to live with her parents. Yah, that must be it.

_____________________________

Basically if you can't inspire someone to trust you deeply, you aren't going to be able to buy that or a reasonable facsimile thereof. -DesFIP

(in reply to kalikshama)
Profile   Post #: 105
RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 1:11:23 PM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline
quote:

PFFt. With the proper tools, a little imagination and a few hours, it could feel like a lifetime.


Exactly! The bruises would have just gone away in time for the next weekend. However, the OP sees this as a bad thing:

quote:

You love beating women and using whips on them which Master has never done with me.

(in reply to Endivius)
Profile   Post #: 106
RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 1:12:09 PM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

If this was true she is just as fucked up as him. I was only concentrating on him because my attention span today is short, but yeah I agree with your side as well. But she also should have looked before she leaped....if this was true. lol


Yeah.. it's that 'if' there that's so big. My spidey sense is tingling and has been since post one, but.. on rare occasions, there may be someone out there in a similar situation who can benefit (aside from the obvious lulz benefit) from getting diverse feedback into similar situations.

Hold the reins or let them go. Set clear boundaries and don't flake. The last thing I would ever advise a bottomy type to do though, is to try to run the show. If it works, you aren't with a dom and if it doesn't, you may screw up what could have been something great.

Anyway.. I'm outtie. Himself just sent me the most awesome quote from Bob Marley and I'm going to bask in my own personal happiness and sext him at work now. Ya'll have fun!

TIP time!

(TIP - Total Immersion in Perversion!)

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 107
RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 1:12:47 PM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus




Hey, don't discourage them it makes for lulzy reading for me, and watching the OP's of these wackfests rearrange their stories is priceless!! I mean, dang, we are responsible for this person NEVER EVER NEVER HAVING KIDS.

I say our work is done, don't you?



Aw well hell Lady H !! Can't we fuck around with her life a lil bit more? We was having fun. (How much worse can it get? Four hour commute, living with nosy ass parents, in 16 years can't afford her own place. Shesh)

As far as something smelly fishy, can you say: great big tuna processing & canning plant.



_____________________________



(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 108
RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 1:16:14 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus




Hey, don't discourage them it makes for lulzy reading for me, and watching the OP's of these wackfests rearrange their stories is priceless!! I mean, dang, we are responsible for this person NEVER EVER NEVER HAVING KIDS.

I say our work is done, don't you?



Aw well hell Lady H !! Can't we fuck around with her life a lil bit more? We was having fun. (How much worse can it get? Four hour commute, living with nosy ass parents, in 16 years can't afford her own place. Shesh)

As far as something smelly fishy, can you say: great big tuna processing & canning plant.




PLEASE continue to fuck with her, there is still potential in this thread!

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to ChatteParfaitt)
Profile   Post #: 109
RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 1:19:46 PM   
Karmastic


Posts: 1650
Joined: 4/5/2012
From: Los Angeles
Status: offline
quote:

PLEASE continue to fuck with her, there is still potential in this thread!

how does that work if OP is long gone? mental masturbation...?

_____________________________

[Awaiting Approval]

If my experience level makes you feel superior, that is your problem, not mine.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 110
RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 1:21:34 PM   
Endivius


Posts: 1238
Joined: 8/22/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama

You love beating women and using whips on them which Master has never done with me.



I don't beat women. I explore the canvas of thier flesh and the emotional release of thier deepest inhibitions, bringing out the colors wich most aptly excite me. Namely red and purple. Picaso used a brush, I prefer ....whatever is handy.

_____________________________

Basically if you can't inspire someone to trust you deeply, you aren't going to be able to buy that or a reasonable facsimile thereof. -DesFIP

(in reply to kalikshama)
Profile   Post #: 111
RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 1:25:37 PM   
JeffBC


Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
Status: offline 		What i want to know is this. Am i obligated to obey his orders if i am uncomfortable with them even though i knew about this from the beginning and have repeatedly promised to obey every order whether i like it or not?
That depends on how you see such promises. For me, I would not feel so obligated. Then again, I doubt I would've made such a promise without A LOT more history than you two have. For me, it would have occurred to me that the phrase "every order" covers A LOT of ground... much of it a lot more troublesome than what you've run into so far.

Am i the one in control and taking control away from him?
He is in control in some areas, you are in others. He wants more. You don't trust him.

Is the saying that "without obedience there is no submission"really true?
It is for me. But that statement makes it a black and white sort of thing. What he's really saying is without complete and total obedience there is no submission. I disagree with that. There's plenty of middle ground for "some obedience" and "some submission". I personally feel that middle ground is VERY appropriate early in relationships.

Do you think i should give in and obey his orders about having sex with other men during work hours even if i am uncomfortable with it?
No. My reasoning there is that he has not accepted responsibility for you commensurate with the authority he demands. I might demand such a thing of Carol. But then again, I'm on the hook for providing for her until she dies. If she lost her job that would impact me. I have skin in the game. I generally believe it's a bad idea to get into total power exchange without total responsibility exchange also.

_____________________________

I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

(in reply to Stephanie72)
Profile   Post #: 112
RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 1:39:03 PM   
SassySarijane


Posts: 1558
Joined: 12/20/2007
From: KC Area Missouri
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Endivius


quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama

You love beating women and using whips on them which Master has never done with me.



I don't beat women. I explore the canvas of thier flesh and the emotional release of thier deepest inhibitions, bringing out the colors wich most aptly excite me. Namely red and purple. Picaso used a brush, I prefer ....whatever is handy.



What, no black or blue mixed in????

_____________________________

Sarah2
Deviant Mind
Wild Side Readers
LPTnB

(in reply to Endivius)
Profile   Post #: 113
RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 1:48:51 PM   
merge9


Posts: 95
Joined: 6/11/2012
Status: offline
quote:

Do you think i should give in and obey his orders about having sex with other men during work hours even if i am uncomfortable with it?

No. My reasoning there is that he has not accepted responsibility for you commensurate with the authority he demands. I might demand such a thing of Carol. But then again, I'm on the hook for providing for her until she dies. If she lost her job that would impact me. I have skin in the game. I generally believe it's a bad idea to get into total power exchange without total responsibility exchange also.


Well said! How long have you two been married?






< Message edited by merge9 -- 6/11/2012 1:54:01 PM >

(in reply to JeffBC)
Profile   Post #: 114
RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 1:59:39 PM   
poise


Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephanie72
When we first met he had made it clear to me that i would have to have sex with other men and could not refuse any
who asked.

Call me a stickler for details, but I don't see why you are in such a tizzy over this. If no one is asking you to
have sex with them, how is that breaking a promise? What means would he have to verify that you've done
so or not? Were you also to take pictures?

quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephanie72
Master knows that i have eplipesy and has stood beside me for years. He hasn't given up on me as many others have.
Now my parents are completely mad at me. i was so concered with the fact that i didn't want to do this that i forgot
everyhing he had done for me and did to take care of me. My parents had to remind me.

Why don't you tell your parents that Mr. Wonderful wanted you to have sex with strange men at work?
Would they be more mad that you'd done so?

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to Stephanie72)
Profile   Post #: 115
RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 2:06:12 PM   
Endivius


Posts: 1238
Joined: 8/22/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SassySarijane

What, no black or blue mixed in????



I dabble in all the mediums.

_____________________________

Basically if you can't inspire someone to trust you deeply, you aren't going to be able to buy that or a reasonable facsimile thereof. -DesFIP

(in reply to SassySarijane)
Profile   Post #: 116
RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 2:08:58 PM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline 		QFT


quote:

I generally believe it's a bad idea to get into total power exchange without total responsibility exchange also.


_____________________________



(in reply to JeffBC)
Profile   Post #: 117
RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 2:09:40 PM   
JstAnotherSub


Posts: 6174
Status: offline
quote:

Why don't you tell your parents that Mr. Wonderful wanted you to have sex with strange men at work?
Would they be more mad that you'd done so?
Poise, for the win, I do believe.

_____________________________

yep

(in reply to poise)
Profile   Post #: 118
RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 2:18:44 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: JeffBC
I generally believe it's a bad idea to get into total power exchange without total responsibility exchange also.


This needs to be carved into stone somewhere, because it's the absolute truth.


_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to JeffBC)
Profile   Post #: 119
RE: Questions and advice - 6/11/2012 2:29:02 PM   
SassySarijane


Posts: 1558
Joined: 12/20/2007
From: KC Area Missouri
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Endivius


quote:

ORIGINAL: SassySarijane

What, no black or blue mixed in????



I dabble in all the mediums.



That works ~grin~

_____________________________

Sarah2
Deviant Mind
Wild Side Readers
LPTnB

(in reply to Endivius)
Profile   Post #: 120
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