RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (Full Version)

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frazzle -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/27/2013 7:36:57 PM)

Your insults aimed at LP are ludicrous, she has never claimed or purported to be a fin domme.
(oh and me and her rarely agree on anything).

TNK has always been open and honest about her life choices, so no hidden agenda.

Apart from anything else, im confused as to why we should all treat male subs as delicate little flowers, incapable of making adult decisions.
You make choices, live with them, no one holds a gun to your head.

As an added extra, under your premise every housewife, house husband is a prostitute. They get paid (house keeping money) while providing service, wether it be sexual or otherwise.
I'm also a prostitute if someone serves me in a shop and gets a hard on!!!!




evesgrden -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/27/2013 7:44:11 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: dink22
Uh, not sure what channel this was on. You're saying femdom SHOULD NOT be equal to conventional heterosexuality and gay sexuality? That we're inferior? That this is obvious and a guy like me is flat out silly to try to EVER posture femdom as being equal to male-dominant heterosexuality?

On CM, more and more, I'm beginning to think you're right. In the future, they'll say Femdom was an early 21st century phenomenon that flared out and was defeated socially, simply because there was never any real female support.



It's got nothing to do with equality. I see myself as heterosexual. I have had relationships with a d/s dynamic and those without. I definitely prefer with. But that dynamic has to do with a hierarchy within the relationship. Either way, I'm heterosexual. Not bi, not flexi or any variation thereof.

You seem to think being a femdom is going to go away; you don't seem to understand that we are of that generation where girls were not allowed to wear pants to school no matter what the temperature nor how deep the snow. Bras were burned. The ERA was introduced to congress in 1972. My sister in law was one of 3, THREE medical students in her school. THREE. You know what a big deal it was for a female doctor to be giving orders, but that's the way medicine works. You and I were in highschool then. Women weren't allowed to take out loans without their husband's PERMISSION. A woman wouldn't be paid the same as a man. That's US dink.. you and me, that's OUR generation. Women are only starting to feel free to be in charge, and to have role models that pave the way for that.

What exactly would you have people do other than wave placards that say, "no findommes allowed on websites".

In fact, if there was no such thing as a findomme, say the concept had never been invented, what would be so different for you now? How would your life be better? I don't get this hostility you have towards it, particularly when there's no deceit and people are honest about what they're doing and why.




TNDommeK -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/27/2013 7:44:11 PM)

Hahahaha, I like the "serves me in a shop" statement.

I didn't get the part where he said that about LP either, I've never heard her say one iota about being a pro or fin.
As I said, he gets things in his head and runs with it.

Ok gotta run, off to that thing he says I don't have...a job! Lol
Y'all have a good night.




LadyPact -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/27/2013 7:44:39 PM)

LOL.

True, frazzle. Very true. We're often on opposing sides of discussion. But I don't think it's ever been because either of us ever felt it was coming from a place of dishonesty. Just different viewpoints.

Thanks, btw.




dink22 -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/27/2013 7:49:13 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: TNDommeK

Not really, I just see that you're one of the people who are set in his ways so much to believe the sun is purple, even of there is an outside for you to go look to see that it's not.

Kinda like how old ass racist ppl down here are...like no matter how they see the world evolving or see races mixing and everyone being cool...they are still stuck in 1950 and no matter what you try to tell them or show them, they are stuck in their ways. Sad really.

Those are the types you just laugh at.


Look, you can describe what I say in terms that make you feel better.

But you won't personally feel better.

Like I said, you need a reality check. You're trying to make yourself feel better by saying, "Oh no I don't and he's such a fool." And yet you come back HERE for comfort? Where you're a regular and have "friends" who you hope wil poo-pooh me?

Ahh. But never mind. I'm a "type you just laugh at."





tazzygirl -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/27/2013 9:26:32 PM)

I often laugh at anyone who is incredibly intolerant.

What would be your ultimate goal here, dink? What is it you seek in regards to fin dom/mes?





lovesebony -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/28/2013 2:05:17 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MariaB
I used to work as a pro Domme in central London


I think part of the miscommuniction is that the legal definition of prostitution varies across jurisdictions.

For example, laws in the UK are radically different than in the US.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2008/feb/22/suffolkmurders.ukcrime5
"prostitution has always been legal in the UK, in the sense that it is not illegal to pay for sex, or to receive money for it." (substitute "sexual gratification" for "sex" for the purpose of this discussion).

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prostitution_in_the_United_Kingdom
"In the United Kingdom, prostitution itself (the exchange of sexual services for money) is legal"

Contrast that with most jurisdictions in the USA where money-for-sexual-gratification-where-touch-is-involved is illegal, and you can see why we people, of the world, won't ever agree.

We're all working with different definitions of Financial Domination.




Polyneices -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/28/2013 2:25:29 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar
he's telling us that a dog is the same thing as a wolf, and that we're trying to explain that, while their are similarities between the two, and they're related, they are not the same thing, precisely because there are crucial differences.


The Goddess of Logic has impeccable logic, as one would expect.

Prostitution, as defined in the USA, is so very close to 'contact' Financial Domination, so as be nearly indistinguishable if sexual arousal is involved. It's more like the difference between a cop that stays within the narrow confines of the law, versus a cop that bends the law a bit, in order to accomplish "his" version of justice.




tazzygirl -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/28/2013 2:39:02 AM)

quote:

Prostitution, as defined in the USA, is so very close to 'contact' Financial Domination


And the difference between those and a dominatrix?




Enobaria -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/28/2013 2:39:28 AM)


quote:

that can lead back to the question about movie stars who do sex scenes. There is no spiritual connection there for them, they are doing a sexual act, and getting paid. So what say you about them? Prostitutes?


I think the point was the money wasn't for the sex so much as the money was for the acting

Findomming is acting, in my mind hence not prostitution.

If all the Johns would just bring a camera with them during their sessions nobody would ever get prosecuted for prostitution in the US!




Pyramus -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/28/2013 3:14:18 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: ThePrincessKali

I am a fin domme and as I've stated have never had any type of sexual contact online or otherwise with a sub.


I read this thread with interest because I have no idea how financial domination works but can it also work for a submissive to make good money?




anaturalsubmiss -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/28/2013 3:16:52 AM)

quote:

The term "unnatural" is not included in MOST definitions. Here is the Wiki definition:


Why did unnatural get thrown in the mix here?




Subano -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/28/2013 3:27:08 AM)

> Bras were burned.

You remind me. Why did they burn the bra anyway, in the olden days?

What was the point?




TNDommeK -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/28/2013 3:30:10 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: dink22


quote:

ORIGINAL: TNDommeK

Not really, I just see that you're one of the people who are set in his ways so much to believe the sun is purple, even of there is an outside for you to go look to see that it's not.

Kinda like how old ass racist ppl down here are...like no matter how they see the world evolving or see races mixing and everyone being cool...they are still stuck in 1950 and no matter what you try to tell them or show them, they are stuck in their ways. Sad really.

Those are the types you just laugh at.


Look, you can describe what I say in terms that make you feel better.

But you won't personally feel better.

Like I said, you need a reality check. You're trying to make yourself feel better by saying, "Oh no I don't and he's such a fool." And yet you come back HERE for comfort? Where you're a regular and have "friends" who you hope wil poo-pooh me?

Ahh. But never mind. I'm a "type you just laugh at."




I don't describe anything, it's written in the thread, everyone sees it.

I feel great, not sure what you mean by I won't feel better.

I don't go anywhere for comfort except my husband and my home. I enjoy posting here because I have the ability to have an open mind and I learn things. I also enjoy reading what my Internet friends are up to. Not sure what that has to do with anything. Sounds like you're running out of gas there dinky.

And of course I laugh, have you actually read the crap coming out of your mouth? I mean seriously...I think this is where your reality check comes in.
Lol

By the way, sorry I was late to the party..I was actually working. [8|]




TNDommeK -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/28/2013 3:31:46 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Pyramus


quote:

ORIGINAL: ThePrincessKali

I am a fin domme and as I've stated have never had any type of sexual contact online or otherwise with a sub.


I read this thread with interest because I have no idea how financial domination works but can it also work for a submissive to make good money?


Yes it can. Thelilsquaw is on here and she is a pro sub. So it can work.




searching4mysir -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/28/2013 3:59:30 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: dink22


quote:

ORIGINAL: TNDommeK

Not really, I just see that you're one of the people who are set in his ways so much to believe the sun is purple, even of there is an outside for you to go look to see that it's not.

Kinda like how old ass racist ppl down here are...like no matter how they see the world evolving or see races mixing and everyone being cool...they are still stuck in 1950 and no matter what you try to tell them or show them, they are stuck in their ways. Sad really.

Those are the types you just laugh at.


Look, you can describe what I say in terms that make you feel better.

But you won't personally feel better.

Like I said, you need a reality check. You're trying to make yourself feel better by saying, "Oh no I don't and he's such a fool." And yet you come back HERE for comfort? Where you're a regular and have "friends" who you hope wil poo-pooh me?

Ahh. But never mind. I'm a "type you just laugh at."




Even if there were no fin-dommes on this site, you would still have trouble getting laid. Negative attitudes are not attractive and male subs would STILL outnumber dommes, and the ratio would be even worse.

So, why, again, should you be the arbiter of whose kinks can be accomodated and whose can't and how?




thezeppo -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/28/2013 4:26:36 AM)

FR

I maybe require some education on the workings of findomme (if only someone would start a thread about it!), but for me I think it is the expectation that puts me off. I do take personal pleasure from giving to others, but that pleasure comes from finding the perfect gift for someone, or surprising someone with a gift they weren't expecting. If the dynamic of my relationship was an expectation that I would provide money or gifts as the cost of continuing communication then I doubt I would remain fulfilled for long. That's just me though, different strokes and all of that. Personally I do consider it legitimate, I tend to think that as long as people are happy then that's what matters.

As to why people react so strongly to it, I think that has a lot to do with the ubiquitous nature of findomme on the other side. I would venture to suggest that those who have the strongest reactions to it are single sub males who get frustrated with wading through countless profiles saying 'u r beneaf me, i take ur cash and ignore u'. It's not what those men are looking for and a lot of the dommes on the other side seem to be only looking for that. I have some sympathy with that frustration, but I think the obvious conclusion is that Collarme is perhaps not the ideal place to meet 'the one' and that I should spread my wings rather than stamp my feet.




searching4mysir -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/28/2013 5:03:04 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: thezeppo

FR

I maybe require some education on the workings of findomme (if only someone would start a thread about it!), but for me I think it is the expectation that puts me off. I do take personal pleasure from giving to others, but that pleasure comes from finding the perfect gift for someone, or surprising someone with a gift they weren't expecting. If the dynamic of my relationship was an expectation that I would provide money or gifts as the cost of continuing communication then I doubt I would remain fulfilled for long. That's just me though, different strokes and all of that. Personally I do consider it legitimate, I tend to think that as long as people are happy then that's what matters.

As to why people react so strongly to it, I think that has a lot to do with the ubiquitous nature of findomme on the other side. I would venture to suggest that those who have the strongest reactions to it are single sub males who get frustrated with wading through countless profiles saying 'u r beneaf me, i take ur cash and ignore u'. It's not what those men are looking for and a lot of the dommes on the other side seem to be only looking for that. I have some sympathy with that frustration, but I think the obvious conclusion is that Collarme is perhaps not the ideal place to meet 'the one' and that I should spread my wings rather than stamp my feet.




Fin-domme can work in a variety of ways: ultimately it is about controlling finances. A responsible, experienced findomme isn't going to kill the goose that laid the golden egg (so to speak). She may set you up on a budget, she may require you to ask permission before spending money on things other than rent, utilities, etc. (the basics of life). It isn't just about the bitchy woman with her hand out to go shopping while flipping you the bird. Yes, that CAN be a part of it, but it doesn't have to be.

There are a lot of men with fin-domme profiles that are as you described (as well as young women who think it is an easy way to get cash) so it is up to the fin-sub/slave to do their due diligence to make sure that there is still compatibility if they don't want what you described.





searching4mysir -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/28/2013 5:05:38 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Subano

> Bras were burned.

You remind me. Why did they burn the bra anyway, in the olden days?

What was the point?



Bras were seen as a sign of male oppression of females.




thezeppo -> RE: Financial Domination / What are your thoughts & Why ? (7/28/2013 5:47:12 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: searching4mysir


quote:

ORIGINAL: thezeppo

FR

I maybe require some education on the workings of findomme (if only someone would start a thread about it!), but for me I think it is the expectation that puts me off. I do take personal pleasure from giving to others, but that pleasure comes from finding the perfect gift for someone, or surprising someone with a gift they weren't expecting. If the dynamic of my relationship was an expectation that I would provide money or gifts as the cost of continuing communication then I doubt I would remain fulfilled for long. That's just me though, different strokes and all of that. Personally I do consider it legitimate, I tend to think that as long as people are happy then that's what matters.

As to why people react so strongly to it, I think that has a lot to do with the ubiquitous nature of findomme on the other side. I would venture to suggest that those who have the strongest reactions to it are single sub males who get frustrated with wading through countless profiles saying 'u r beneaf me, i take ur cash and ignore u'. It's not what those men are looking for and a lot of the dommes on the other side seem to be only looking for that. I have some sympathy with that frustration, but I think the obvious conclusion is that Collarme is perhaps not the ideal place to meet 'the one' and that I should spread my wings rather than stamp my feet.




Fin-domme can work in a variety of ways: ultimately it is about controlling finances. A responsible, experienced findomme isn't going to kill the goose that laid the golden egg (so to speak). She may set you up on a budget, she may require you to ask permission before spending money on things other than rent, utilities, etc. (the basics of life). It isn't just about the bitchy woman with her hand out to go shopping while flipping you the bird. Yes, that CAN be a part of it, but it doesn't have to be.

There are a lot of men with fin-domme profiles that are as you described (as well as young women who think it is an easy way to get cash) so it is up to the fin-sub/slave to do their due diligence to make sure that there is still compatibility if they don't want what you described.




I take your point, a lot is lumped together in discussions of findomme. I've just read someone on another thread saying good dominants build up their subs rather than destroy them, and that rang true to me. I suppose if one were to base their impression of findomme purely from the other side, it gives the impression of being a destructive kink. However, I can see how something like budget management could be positive for a sub. As you say, its all about compatibility.




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