quote:

ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1

In their eyes - it is.

Everyone has their preferences.
Those that don't give a shit who they go with call it discrimination.
Others just call it a personal preference.

But who someone has been with in the past shouldn't factor into your preferences (unless it was morally reprehensible i.e. children, animals, etc)
You're not dating or having sex with their exes, so why does it matter?

quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1

You really don't have a clue on human nature do you.
You really are so very naive.

If you haven't managed to work it out at your age, I don't hold much hope.

quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1

In their eyes - it is.

Everyone has their preferences.
Those that don't give a shit who they go with call it discrimination.
Others just call it a personal preference.

But who someone has been with in the past shouldn't factor into your preferences (unless it was morally reprehensible i.e. children, animals, etc)
You're not dating or having sex with their exes, so why does it matter?

Because, numbnuts, it just does to some people.
Just because you don't care doesn't mean everyone has to have PoV as you.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl

Can't help but feel people who object to bisexuals do it because it bothers them on a personal level, not a rational one. Same level that bothers people when they find out I've been with non white guys. Pure discrimnation. And honestly someone with such a closed bigoted mind wouldn't be attractive to me anyway, so they can be miserable and complain about not finding anyone to meet their bigoted standards. Karma.

quote:

ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl

Can't help but feel people who object to bisexuals do it because it bothers them on a personal level, not a rational one. Same level that bothers people when they find out I've been with non white guys. Pure discrimnation. And honestly someone with such a closed bigoted mind wouldn't be attractive to me anyway, so they can be miserable and complain about not finding anyone to meet their bigoted standards. Karma.

It's not unusual for actual lesbians to not only want to not have sex with men, but to also not want to have close personal relationships/friendships with men. Their circle of friends are only other females, they don't want to talk about anything that involves men, they don't like watching romantic comedies that involve heterosexual relationships, they hang out at lesbian bars instead of typical bars, their hobbies are female orientated, etc, etc.
All without them necessarily hating men (though some do). They just don't like living in a heterosexual dominated culture where they're constantly confronted with how they are 'different' and so they avoid that culture, and instead hang out in their own culture.

It's really no different from born deaf people who went to deaf schools having a whole culture of their own, and hanging out primarily with other Deaf people (look up the difference between Deaf with a big D, and deaf with a small d).

You, as a bisexual girl, would presumable not have that same desire to avoid typical heterosexual culture. You'd have friendships with males, you'd readily watch heterosexual dominated movies, you wouldn't want to exclusively go to lesbian bars/bdsm clubs, etc, etc.

Which would make you a TERRIBLE partner for a lesbian who has no interest in such things.
That's got nothing to do with her being bigoted. It's got nothing to do with her disapproving of you, or your past.
It's just got to do with the fact that, due to your interest in men (past or future) you wouldn't be very compatible with her style of life.

You saying that it's bigoted for somebody to only want to engage with partners with which they share mutual cultural interests, and declining to engage with partners who are socially incompatible with themselves because of sexual interests is extremely shortsighted and prudish.
It's akin to claiming that just because somebody is a heterosexual male they SHOULD be attracted to post-op mtF transsexuals, and that if they're not, they're bigots.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1

You really don't have a clue on human nature do you.
You really are so very naive.

If you haven't managed to work it out at your age, I don't hold much hope.

What in the world are you going on about? Bigotry and discrimnation is something you are telling me I should embrace and accept?

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl

I didn't use any derogatory titles, unlike you who so eloquently called me numbnuts for advocating an open minded approach to sexuality and acceptance of others.

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ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl

I didn't use any derogatory titles, unlike you who so eloquently called me numbnuts for advocating an open minded approach to sexuality and acceptance of others.

So you call those that you don't agree with a bigot??
And accuse them of being discriminatory?
What's worse, can't understand why they have the right to be different or have different values to you.


Not everyone is as "open minded" as you claim to be.
To tar everyone with a smelly brush because you don't agree with them is being more than a bigot.

quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1

To tar everyone with a smelly brush because you don't agree with them is being more than a bigot.

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ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1

To tar everyone with a smelly brush because you don't agree with them is being more than a bigot.

I have a very close friend is very religious. She believes that homosexuality and bisexuality is a sin. However, she doesn't treat those that are any differently - she just won't do it herself or be in a relationship that would do.

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ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1

Maybe you aren't making any rational sense.


If anything, your intolerance of others having a preference is very much a bigot.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MariaB

If you are heterosexual then you look for a partner of the opposite sex.
If you are gay, you look for a partner of the same sex.
and if you're bi, you could be looking for a partner of either sex.

Is any of the above selfish?

For lesbians I don’t think it’s the risk of HIV but more the risk of falling in love and then losing their lover to a man. I'm bi and I lived with my queer fem lover for a few years but when the hardships of queer life get too much I turned my attention back to heteroville. I was the first bi she'd ever really bothered with. She always said and I think she was right, that bi women were far more likely to break a lesbians heart.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: MariaB

If you are heterosexual then you look for a partner of the opposite sex.
If you are gay, you look for a partner of the same sex.
and if you're bi, you could be looking for a partner of either sex.

Is any of the above selfish?

For lesbians I don’t think it’s the risk of HIV but more the risk of falling in love and then losing their lover to a man. I'm bi and I lived with my queer fem lover for a few years but when the hardships of queer life get too much I turned my attention back to heteroville. I was the first bi she'd ever really bothered with. She always said and I think she was right, that bi women were far more likely to break a lesbians heart.

You could just as easily cheat on her or leave her for another woman. Would her heart be less broken?

quote:

ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: MariaB

If you are heterosexual then you look for a partner of the opposite sex.
If you are gay, you look for a partner of the same sex.
and if you're bi, you could be looking for a partner of either sex.

Is any of the above selfish?

For lesbians I don’t think it’s the risk of HIV but more the risk of falling in love and then losing their lover to a man. I'm bi and I lived with my queer fem lover for a few years but when the hardships of queer life get too much I turned my attention back to heteroville. I was the first bi she'd ever really bothered with. She always said and I think she was right, that bi women were far more likely to break a lesbians heart.

You could just as easily cheat on her or leave her for another woman. Would her heart be less broken?

Actually that's not true. Statistically speaking, most self-proclaimed bisexual women lean more heavily towards men than women.

As such, it's much more likely for a 'more male leaning bisexual woman' to enter in a relationship with a lesbian, and after a while find that she misses men to much (or meet a man she leans more towards than her current female partner) than it would for a lesbian woman to leave because her sexual feelings aren't fully satisfied in a lesbian relationship.

That's obviously not the case for ALL bisexual women, but it is the case for the vast majority of bisexual women, and thus, it's more risky for a true lesbian to be in a relationship with a bisexual woman than with another lesbian.

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ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl

Cite?

quote:

ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar


However, there are various studies out there that indicate that:
- Women are much more likely to start off identifying as heterosexual, to later shift to being bisexual
- Bisexual women are much more likely to have more long term relationships with men than women
- Bisexual woman are more likely than bisexual men to never have a same sex relationship, and only have infrequent sexual contact with their own sex (sexual adventures with women are cool; dating them is not)