RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF

Page: << < prev 2 3 [4] 5 6 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/12/2016 1:36:46 PM

freedomdwarf1

Posts: 6845
Joined: 10/23/2012
Status: offline

This might help to explain things.

Excerpt: "Dan Savage once observed that “most adult bisexuals, for whatever reason, wind up in opposite-sex relationships.” Whether or not you’re a fan of Savage (or his sometimes dubious takes on bisexuality), the statistics support his assertion: The massive 2013 Pew Research LGBT Survey found 84 percent of self-identified bisexuals in committed relationships have a partner of the opposite sex, while only 9 percent are in same-sex relationships."

This would seem to back up Ishtar's assertion.

_____________________________

“If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear.”

George Orwell, 1903-1950

(in reply to Greatlilbabygirl)

Post #: 61

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/12/2016 1:58:59 PM

Greatlilbabygirl

Posts: 786
Joined: 9/9/2016
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl

Cite?

I don't cite sources for an informal discussion on a message board (you're not grading my papers). If that makes you disregard my statements, I don't really care, as we're not engaging in any kind of formal debate.

However, there are various studies out there that indicate that:
- Women are much more likely to start off identifying as heterosexual, to later shift to being bisexual
- Bisexual women are much more likely to have more long term relationships with men than women
- Bisexual woman are more likely than bisexual men to never have a same sex relationship, and only have infrequent sexual contact with their own sex (sexual adventures with women are cool; dating them is not)

They shouldn't be hard to find if you're really interested.

All of those things would make that a lesbian might very well be wary to trust that a bisexual woman is really interested in a long term relationship, instead of just 'experimenting' until the right man comes along.

Thanks.

I wonder if that's because of societal pressure though. Being that heterosexuality is more accepted in general than homosexuality. If I fell in love with a woman and wasn't already married to my husband the only thing holding me back from being in a committed relationship would be how my friends and family would react, honestly. And I hate that.

I'm understanding better why a lesbian would worry about a bisexual woman. But I don't think the reasons you give are why the OP has an issue with bisexual women. Her reason was because cocks are gross.
Explain that one

quote:

ORIGINAL: bondageerone

lesbian means women for women,
the site of a mans c...
makes me sick...
I do not hate men..
my pleasure comes from women only.
so bi girls who play both ways are out for me...
xx

< Message edited by Greatlilbabygirl -- 10/12/2016 2:01:08 PM >

(in reply to UllrsIshtar)

Post #: 62

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/12/2016 2:03:52 PM

freedomdwarf1

Posts: 6845
Joined: 10/23/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl
Her reason was because cocks are gross.
Explain that one

It's her preference. It's really quite simple.

_____________________________

“If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear.”

George Orwell, 1903-1950

(in reply to Greatlilbabygirl)

Post #: 63

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/12/2016 2:11:15 PM

Danemora

Posts: 752
Joined: 10/9/2006
Status: offline

People do not owe you an explanation or justification regarding their own sexual preferences because...to be blunt...its really none of your business who they are sexual with or why.

_____________________________

~The artist formerly known as SeekingTrinity on tour as a solo act~

(in reply to Greatlilbabygirl)

Post #: 64

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/12/2016 2:14:41 PM

Kana

Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline

From the Washington Post

"More specifically, 1.8 percent of men self-identify as gay and 0.4 percent as bisexual, and 1.5 percent of women self-identify as lesbian and 0.9 percent as bisexual. The results are generally in the same ballpark as past estimates — and far below the long-debunked 10 percent estimate."

1.5% of the population isn't a lot.
As C-space tends to be a micro that is pretty representative of the macro, that answers your question there.

Purely as an observation from clubs, it seems everyone in my area thirty or younger is A-Bi and B-a switch.
Greedy fucks.

_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

(in reply to freedomdwarf1)

Post #: 65

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/12/2016 3:10:22 PM

ThatDizzyChick

Posts: 5490
Status: offline

FR
I see no problem with a lesbian not wnting a relationship with a bi woman. I don't want a relationship with a straight guy, therefore I only date bi guys.
As for UllrsIshtar's claim about bi women and their relationships, well I agree with her, I don't personally know any bi women who had long term relationships with women, they had flings and some really torrid affairs, but not actual long term relationships, so yeah, in my admittedly very limited personal experience, bi women do men more than women.

_____________________________

Not your average bimbo.

(in reply to Kana)

Post #: 66

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/12/2016 3:19:17 PM

Greatlilbabygirl

Posts: 786
Joined: 9/9/2016
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ThatDizzyChick

FR
I see no problem with a lesbian not wnting a relationship with a bi woman. I don't want a relationship with a straight guy, therefore I only date bi guys.
As for UllrsIshtar's claim about bi women and their relationships, well I agree with her, I don't personally know any bi women who had long term relationships with women, they had flings and some really torrid affairs, but not actual long term relationships, so yeah, in my admittedly very limited personal experience, bi women do men more than women.

Personal question, are you worried about the bi guys leaving you for other men?

(in reply to ThatDizzyChick)

Post #: 67

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/12/2016 3:27:56 PM

ThatDizzyChick

Posts: 5490
Status: offline

No more than I am worried about them leaving me for another woman, it's not something I concern myself with.

_____________________________

Not your average bimbo.

(in reply to Greatlilbabygirl)

Post #: 68

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/12/2016 4:05:08 PM

Greatlilbabygirl

Posts: 786
Joined: 9/9/2016
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ThatDizzyChick

No more than I am worried about them leaving me for another woman, it's not something I concern myself with.

Yeah, that's how I'd feel too.

Interesting discussion all.around. I am better informed.

I apologize to any offense I may have caused.

(in reply to ThatDizzyChick)

Post #: 69

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/12/2016 4:09:30 PM

Bhruic

Posts: 985
Joined: 4/11/2012
From: Toronto, Canada
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: ThatDizzyChick

Why not, plenty of women rule out bi men.

True.

I was just wondering about the motivation.

I think many lesbians consider bi girls as tourists, who will never commit to a relationship. I'm not saying that is so, I'm just repeating what I have heard lesbian friends say... But I have other lesbian friends who don't seem to care, and judge commitment on its own merits.

I think women who rule out bi men often do it for different reasons... more visceral reasons that they may not always understand, but that don't come from a good place, IMHO.

_____________________________

pronounced "VROOick"

(in reply to OsideGirl)

Post #: 70

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/12/2016 4:26:11 PM

Diffident

Posts: 163
Joined: 7/12/2016
Status: offline

Another possible reason why a Lesbian would only want to be with another Lesbian is that growing up she might have faced overt discrimination/harassment/bullying, feelings of not fitting in, of not being like other girls, of being alone, rejection by family members/previous friends, or else the paralysing fear of this keeping her from being honest about who she really, maybe for many years, and that only someone else who had also been through it could truly understand. Growing up Gay can be tough in ways that I know that I could not even begin to imagine, which is why the Teenage Gay suicide rate is shockingly high. Being Bi is not the same thing at all really.

I am with freedomdwarf1 on this particular flame war though. No-one ever needs to have a reason or explanation for what their preferences or requirements are in a potential partner. Whether Straight/Gay or Bi, it could be "Must have Long, Dark Hair, Tattoos, Oh and they must have an Irish accent. Yum. Yum. Reason? Because that is what I like." and it really is no-one else's business but theirs.

(in reply to ThatDizzyChick)

Post #: 71

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/12/2016 4:44:59 PM

UllrsIshtar

Posts: 3693
Joined: 7/28/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl

I apologize to any offense I may have caused.

Just for the record: I don't think you're wrong for calling a lesbian whose reason for not dating bisexual women is "cause cock is disgusting" a bigot.

I just don't think that ALL reasons lesbians have for not dating bisexual women are bigoted in nature.

_____________________________

I can be your whore
I am the dirt you created
I am your sinner
And your whore
But let me tell you something baby
You love me for everything you hate me for

(in reply to Greatlilbabygirl)

Post #: 72

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/12/2016 4:46:50 PM

Greatlilbabygirl

Posts: 786
Joined: 9/9/2016
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl

I apologize to any offense I may have caused.

Just for the record: I don't think you're wrong for calling a lesbian whose reason for not dating bisexual women is "cause cock is disgusting" a bigot.

I just don't think that ALL reasons lesbians have for not dating bisexual women are bigoted in nature.

Agreed

(in reply to UllrsIshtar)

Post #: 73

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/12/2016 5:29:54 PM

ohthat1percent

Posts: 167
Joined: 9/24/2016
Status: offline

You do realize there are many BDSM sites that actually charge. There are also, I believe, gay and lesbian sited that charge.

If you are so eager for a charge, why aren't you looking into those?

quote:

ORIGINAL: bondageerone

ps to lucy.
I have suggested many times to C/S
they make a charge..
this would hopefully get rid of the morons/idiots..
like ?????
you know who I mean xx

_____________________________

A dominant man is not a man who is content to simply receive submission; a dominant man is not so obliging.

(in reply to bondageerone)

Post #: 74

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/12/2016 5:47:19 PM

ohthat1percent

Posts: 167
Joined: 9/24/2016
Status: offline

Fast Reply -- just a general reply to all the various responses I have read thus far ---

I am finding it odd people are discombobulated because people differentiate between Straight, Gay and bisexual, and state that they don't want men or women who are whatever.

Does it matter why? More so, it shouldn't matter to anyone but that person. It always seems people ask this "what's the motivation or reason behind what you want or more so "don't want," kind of question in an accusatory way, as if the people who don't want bisexuals or gays or straight are somehow wrong. People like what they like, it shouldn't matter why or what their motivation is for not wanting to be with certain people especially sexually. Sometimes people can articulate it -- other times the reason is simply it squicks them out because that's what they feel. Its not wrong, its not incorrect, and its not offensive -- it simply is someone's personal sexual preference or relationship preference. The only other thing it does is narrow their playing field.

I mean seriously people are allowed their preferences -- it gets really tiring when people who are what the person doesn't want they have a concept of offense and believe they are owed an explanation and if that explanation isn't sufficient then that person is wrong in their sexual preferences of people.

I do note that the "disapproval" tone comes more with gays not wanting bisexual people than heterosexuals not wanting bisexuals. Odd how that is

Sexual preference and attraction should not be held to political correctness of accepting anything and anyone because otherwise you are discriminating, Sorry but that is just wrong thinking. Everyone has preferences -- it doesn't matter why. People need to just accept that people may just not be into them because of whahtever..

< Message edited by ohthat1percent -- 10/12/2016 5:49:55 PM >

_____________________________

A dominant man is not a man who is content to simply receive submission; a dominant man is not so obliging.

(in reply to freedomdwarf1)

Post #: 75

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/13/2016 2:38:21 AM

bondageerone

Posts: 522
Joined: 6/16/2016
Status: offline

dear Great...... you are entitled to your way,
and the amount of men that want me, purely for sex,
shows me how pathetic they really are.
xx

(in reply to Greatlilbabygirl)

Post #: 76

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/13/2016 3:32:45 AM

Greta75

Posts: 9968
Joined: 2/6/2011
Status: offline

FR

The reason I would not engage with a bisexual male. Is you know relationships come and go.

But I would hate to be left for another man. By a man ya know!

That be crap!

Also, it's like I want a pure dominant and not a switch.

A part of me will always feel like he is not "whole" without male sex. Just like a switch is not "whole" without switching.

So I totally understand lesbians not wanting to date a bisexual.

In my country, it's very bitter for lesbians when they lose their girlfriend to a male. Seems to hurt worst.

(in reply to OsideGirl)

Post #: 77

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/13/2016 3:45:02 AM

Greta75

Posts: 9968
Joined: 2/6/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl
Her reason was because cocks are gross.
Explain that one

I am a straight woman who thinks cocks are gross.
I mean seriously. From my first sight of a cock. I never liked how it looked like. Till today, I still don't like the appearance of any cocks.

I just like how it feels inside me. But I always don't like the appearances of it.

I like looking at wrists and calves better than cocks.

And I have met straight men who also tell me, they don't like the appearances of vaginas!

It's just, physical preferences and taste in aesthetic things. Like, some things just don't look great to some people forever.

< Message edited by Greta75 -- 10/13/2016 3:46:07 AM >

(in reply to Greatlilbabygirl)

Post #: 78

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/13/2016 4:35:48 AM

longwayhome

Posts: 1035
Joined: 1/9/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic

Were you guaranteed lesbians when you signed on???
You should ask for your money back.

Sorry for getting to this post a bit late, but this is so true.

The rest of the stuff on the thread about personal preference is a bit beyond me. Why should we be bothered about anyone else's preferences or judge them for it? As long as it's a personal preference and not an open prejudice, what is the problem?

You can choose not to hang around with certain people in your personal life, but as long as you respect them in your workplace, at the shops, when you meet them on night's out etc. what's the beef? It's a bit of a shame if I am attracted to someone and they aren't attracted to me because I'm the wrong sex or sexuality but, ho hum, that's life. I'm sure plenty of people don't like my attitude, clothes, friends or politics either.

What I am sure about is that nobody gets a written guarantee of "finding" the person they want on this or any other site.

Life doesn't present this stuff to you gift-wrapped, so why do people have the expectation that a website will, no matter how specialised it is? [Rhetorical question of course]

(in reply to Lucylastic)

Post #: 79

RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF - 10/13/2016 4:49:44 AM

TieMeInKnottss

Posts: 1944
Joined: 9/6/2012
Status: offline

Oh Oh!!! Me! Me! Pick me!! Is this a fill in the blank game?!? My answer is...."on C/S A Real Shortage of....." male doms in MD!!

(in reply to freedomdwarf1)

Post #: 80

Page: << < prev 2 3 [4] 5 6 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: ON C/S A REAL SHORTAGE OF

Page: << < prev 2 3 [4] 5 6 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.094