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RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 7:19:44 AM   
Homestead


Posts: 1005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

quote:

ORIGINAL: Homestead

I'm Dominant.

I don't like to be controlled by my glands any more than I want to be by a woman.


D/s, when done correctly, supersedes sex.

If all a male wants is to behave like a butter churn with a female... he may as well just stay where he’s at. And don’t disappoint those that truly wish to practice the lifestyle.

Male slaves aren’t as “cowed” as you might think.  As the saying goes “when Momma’s happy... EVERYONE’S happy”



Beleive me. I have much more admiration for a man who can excercise some self control than those who make a big deal about acting like stray dogs. And women who act like bitches in heat get just as much respect from me. What I find REALLY amusing is that D/s has such a HUGE range of pleasureable activities.

And you deny or shut down ONE thing for a WHILE......and these people act like it's the end of the world. Right, you practice a "control dynamic."

< Message edited by Homestead -- 8/30/2006 7:20:46 AM >

(in reply to LotusSong)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 7:21:34 AM   
Sunshine119


Posts: 611
Joined: 8/8/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: popeye1250.

I also use orgasm denial to deprive a sub sometimes for hours.
The think about me having sex with a sub is that she exists for MY pleasure.
I'll fuck her when *I* want to and she can like it or not like it, I really don't care.
Do I like to give a sub orgasms? Hell yes and more than one!
I like to see her body spasm from orgasm after orgasm until she is exhausted and laying in a sweaty heap.
Until her clit is so sensitive loud music can make her cross her legs.


Yup....my Dominant sounds just like you.  He tells me that BDSM is foreplay and he couldn't even think of not f**king me over and over and over again afterwards.  Having me fall into a sweaty shaking heap afterwards....yep!

LOL!  I love it!


_____________________________


Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

(in reply to popeye1250)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 7:25:29 AM   
Sunshine119


Posts: 611
Joined: 8/8/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Homestead

That's fine popeye.

I used to be pretty much like you are now..My tastes changed over the years as the mental side grew more attractive to me than the physical. I could go back to doing things the way you do at any time. But that would be living in the past to me.


For us, it seems like the BDSM part of the relationship is very seperate from the D/s part.  The D/s is all about control in all aspects of life.  The BDSM incorporates the control, but is primarily about the kink (followed by a good f**k). 


_____________________________


Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

(in reply to Homestead)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 7:34:25 AM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
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These comments only really apply to het couples who choose to have sex as part of their Ms or Ds relationship.

I think is has more to do with society. Men are constantly chasing women for sex (at least in the het world). Thus, when men are in the Dominant position, they get what they want: sex, when and how they like it. When women are in the Dominant position, they get what they want: sex, when and how they like it. Both use what they want as a way to control thier subs/slaves...fem subs are required to be "ready" at all times, male subs are required to shut the fuck up about it and stop nagging.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
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(in reply to Aimtoplease101)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 7:37:15 AM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam

...fem subs are required to be "ready" at all times, male subs are required to shut the fuck up about it and stop nagging.

Master Fire



I love it!

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.


(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 7:41:41 AM   
Homestead


Posts: 1005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sunshine119

quote:

ORIGINAL: Homestead

That's fine popeye.

I used to be pretty much like you are now..My tastes changed over the years as the mental side grew more attractive to me than the physical. I could go back to doing things the way you do at any time. But that would be living in the past to me.


For us, it seems like the BDSM part of the relationship is very seperate from the D/s part.  The D/s is all about control in all aspects of life.  The BDSM incorporates the control, but is primarily about the kink (followed by a good f**k). 



I like control so much, that I control the kink as well. Rather than letting it control me. It broadens my range of options.

(in reply to Sunshine119)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 7:48:00 AM   
MzTlaz


Posts: 140
Joined: 8/8/2006
Status: offline
That's funny...I've been told I'm not a "Twue Domme" for not having sex with every sub I play with.   I have to be in a LTR to be having sex with someone and that seems to make me one of the freaks in the BDSM world.

As for Dommes denying sex and Doms demanding it.....

I ponder the nature of it....in my observations boys/men spend a lot of time trying to get sex, as a girl/woman I have all my life had to deal with the constant sexual approaches of men, some forceful...so when a man becomes a Dom maybe a lot of the attraction is that they can demand sex and actually get it....whereas a Domme is able to deny sex and and actually be obeyed and respected for it.

Maybe it's simply about controlling that which we couldn't at an earlier time?   And, I don't say this as a blanket statement....I think there are many reasons as to why we do what we do or are who we are.  For me, I definitely like the fact that I have the control and I think my personal history has something to do with it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Oumae


I find many male subs approach saying they have a desire for chastity and have been told by some I'm not a "Twue Domme" for having sex.  I know I'm true to my desires.

Oumae

(in reply to Oumae)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 7:50:27 AM   
Homestead


Posts: 1005
Status: offline
You can let the dog loose to hump,or you can kennel it.


D/s just provides an option to have it both ways.

(in reply to MzTlaz)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 8:15:56 AM   
sctiepipn


Posts: 12
Joined: 2/28/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL:
Well, it's a pity your sister doesn't spend her time chasing up women who don't pay child support.  In the US there are more deadbeat moms than deadbeat dads.



I am glad I am not one of those deadbeats, but if it wasnt for my X riding my ass, and trying to give me "the fucking I get, for the fucking I gave"  I would not be getting fucked on a regular basis either

(in reply to Pimpernell)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 12:16:12 PM   
CreativeDominant


Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Aimtoplease101

One common distinction between male dominated v. female dominated relationships seems to be the dominant's attitude towards having intercourse with the sub. Specifically, many female dommes seem to restrict, or even completely deny, intercourse with their male subs, and some will restrict the sub's orgasms of any sort. Conversely, most male doms appear to feature intercourse with their female subs prominently in their D/s relationship, and often enjoy bringing the sub to orgasm.

Any thoughts about this? Is it simply true that, generally speaking, men crave intercourse more than most women? Is there something inherently male domination oriented about penetrative intercourse? Other theories?

Regards, ATP


I don't know that is so much that males crave intercourse more than men.  Part of my viewpoint is that the sex play is just one more of the things I control.  Yeah, there are men who get into dominance simply so they can get fucked.  There are women who get into dominance simply so they have a way to kick male ass.   For myself and for many other male dominants on this site and elsewhere,the control over another is a bigger focus than the physicality of sex.   For many female dominants, it is this same control that is desired more than denial/granting of sex.   The control...whether it be over sexuality or other areas of someone's life...is the centerpoint. 

I disagree with those who think that the ability to have unfettered sex anytime, anywhere is behind all male dominants.
Just as I disagree with those who think that "busting balls and putting a man in his place" or "revenge against the male gender" is behind all female dominants

(in reply to Aimtoplease101)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 12:36:08 PM   
popeye1250


Posts: 18104
Joined: 1/27/2006
From: New Hampshire
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sunshine119

quote:

ORIGINAL: popeye1250.

I also use orgasm denial to deprive a sub sometimes for hours.
The think about me having sex with a sub is that she exists for MY pleasure.
I'll fuck her when *I* want to and she can like it or not like it, I really don't care.
Do I like to give a sub orgasms? Hell yes and more than one!
I like to see her body spasm from orgasm after orgasm until she is exhausted and laying in a sweaty heap.
Until her clit is so sensitive loud music can make her cross her legs.


Yup....my Dominant sounds just like you.  He tells me that BDSM is foreplay and he couldn't even think of not f**king me over and over and over again afterwards.  Having me fall into a sweaty shaking heap afterwards....yep!

LOL!  I love it!


Sunshine, B&D is not always foreplay for me.
Sometimes I use it just because I want to use it.
Sometimes I use it for punishment.
Sometimes I use it for objectification.
Sometimes I use it because I just think the sub needs to be helpless for a few hours, or, to try a new toy on her.
The point is that a sub/slave exists to serve and to be used for whatever you want to (in the case of a slave)
In my experience almost all women like and want sex and I see nothing wrong using a sub for that.
I think at least 5 orgasms per day for a sub is a good standard to use unless you're doing orgasm denial on her for a day or two.
The thing for me is that I get pleasure from giving a sub orgasms.
Forced, uncontrollable, spasmodic orgasms.
Many times I'll give a sub orgasms without having sex with her too.
If a sub was the kind of person who didn't like sex or having orgasms I wouldn't be the right Dominant for her.
You can also use orgasms as "punishment".

(in reply to Sunshine119)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 12:45:56 PM   
princessrn


Posts: 57
Joined: 7/23/2006
Status: offline
popeye
with all this change  in what You use it for isnt that confusing to  Your sub ??? or just dont You care ?
how You come across  in Your messages is that its not a sub You need but a dumb beast that wont get so brain fried on Your changing goals of punishment and pleasure of what You want only ....sorry if i sound off hand but  what i seen of messages You have wrote it verges on abuse not Mastering .

(in reply to popeye1250)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 12:54:06 PM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CreativeDominant

Just as I disagree with those who think that "busting balls and putting a man in his place" or "revenge against the male gender" is behind all female dominants


Well thank God you said this because your post was "loosing me" :)

I'm just going to speak for myself  here and confirm what you said.  I, in no way, enjoy dominace over a man to "bust his balls" or because I'm doing it to vindicate all the wrongs real or imagined levied on the female gender over the eons.  I do it simply becuae I'm good at it.  It's an ego thing.  Sort of a "hey.. let me show you what I can do..this'll blow your mind" mindset.

I understand men and what drives them. I take whatever that is and play with it be  it their ego, their mind, or their body.  I prefer to share my female approach to things.  Now if I have to tie them down so they hold still long enough for me to get my point actross.  welllll.. ya do what you must.   I'm one that does not do humilation..nor dress them up as a female for kicks.  I like my male masculine and I keep him that way.  I know Slave well enough to know what he likes.. and  I figure out MY way to get it to him.  Toying with the male energy is fun for us both. There are practices out there that I simply do and that is agreed on at the very begining.  I do not take things into sadistic over-ride.  It's enough for him to know I COULD.

Nobody should practice domination because of a hate or a get even attitude with the other sex.

Not every female dominant is a feminatzi.

< Message edited by LotusSong -- 8/30/2006 1:40:17 PM >


_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.


(in reply to CreativeDominant)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 1:07:49 PM   
popeye1250


Posts: 18104
Joined: 1/27/2006
From: New Hampshire
Status: offline
Princessrn, no, how can something be "abuse" if the sub wants it?
I would assume that they'd read my profile first! lol
(Oh, I tend to use the word "punishment" as a catchall word leading to some confusion which someone else brought up too.)
No, I don't "abuse" people. I'm actually very kind.

< Message edited by popeye1250 -- 8/30/2006 1:11:54 PM >

(in reply to princessrn)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 1:07:56 PM   
amaidiamond


Posts: 1793
Joined: 2/6/2006
From: Watford / London
Status: offline
Well can't speak from the Dom/me perspective but I can say that as a female sub I am very much service driven but I also have a very very high sex drive, mose so than almost anyone I've ever been with, at the same time even though I have a high sex drive I enjoy denial if it pleases him, I guess what i'm saying is for me, pleasing him makes me happy, the amount of sex I get isn't really relevant, I was in a sexless relationship at one point for quite a while and in the end it was other factors that broke it down, so I guess, if a Dom wants constant sex, great, if they want limited sex, great and anything in between great provided the rest is there, their pleasure however that may come, sexual or service is what brings my enjoyment, seeing my Dom smile and hearing good girl brings more pleasure than the best orgasm.
Hope that made sense, it came from a tired mind!

(in reply to LotusSong)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 1:12:22 PM   
michaelGA2


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Joined: 4/26/2006
Status: offline
There's other sexual activities that can be just as fun, if not more so, than intercourse. sometimes a long foreplay session can be quite enjoyable.

_____________________________

Are we having fun, yet?

(in reply to amaidiamond)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 1:16:07 PM   
popeye1250


Posts: 18104
Joined: 1/27/2006
From: New Hampshire
Status: offline
Amaidiamond, your post made *PERFECT* sense to me!
I like the "service" part as well.

(in reply to amaidiamond)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 1:19:12 PM   
popeye1250


Posts: 18104
Joined: 1/27/2006
From: New Hampshire
Status: offline
Michael, I *specialize* in long foreplay sessions.
Yes, that can be a LOT of fun as well!

(in reply to michaelGA2)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 1:38:10 PM   
amaidiamond


Posts: 1793
Joined: 2/6/2006
From: Watford / London
Status: offline
Lol thank you Popeye, sometimes i think theres only fluff between my ears

(in reply to popeye1250)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Intercourse with subs - 8/30/2006 2:13:12 PM   
Fawne


Posts: 462
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: popeye1250.

B&D is not always foreplay for me.
Sometimes I use it just because I want to use it.
Sometimes I use it for punishment.
Sometimes I use it for objectification.
Sometimes I use it because I just think the sub needs to be helpless for a few hours, or, to try a new toy on her.
The point is that a sub/slave exists to serve and to be used for whatever you want to (in the case of a slave)
In my experience almost all women like and want sex and I see nothing wrong using a sub for that.
I think at least 5 orgasms per day for a sub is a good standard to use unless you're doing orgasm denial on her for a day or two.
The thing for me is that I get pleasure from giving a sub orgasms.
Forced, uncontrollable, spasmodic orgasms.
Many times I'll give a sub orgasms without having sex with her too.
If a sub was the kind of person who didn't like sex or having orgasms I wouldn't be the right Dominant for her.
You can also use orgasms as "punishment".



Terrible, horrible, unimaginable abuse. Oh my!
Where is Bluto when you need him ;)

Too silly for words.

While you may rattle a few brain cells, I surely doubt you will lower anyone's IQ.


(in reply to popeye1250)
Profile   Post #: 60
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