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RE: That "Why" Question - 10/24/2006 11:07:58 AM

LadyMorgynn

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I absolutely encourage my slave to ask me "Why." If for no other reason, it builds TRUST in that he can see that I do not come to my conclusions, or make my rules, indiscrimately. I have a rhyme and reason to everything I do, and once he understands how I think and reason, he will in fact be a better slave for it because he can operate independently of direction, as well as giving him a better understanding of me.

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

Often I have read of dominants that do not necessarily care for their submissives/slaves asking them “why” they make certain decisions. I am a very naturally curious person, and often ask “why” just because I am curious. I do not mean it to be a challenge or to attempt to “argue” my way out of something, but sometimes I want to understand why I am doing whatever it is I have been instructed to do. It lends understanding to the task.

I remember in high school I would always ask “why” I had to do algebra, and no one ever gave me a cogent answer as to “why”, so I did not bother to remember it, years later I did need it in my statistics class, and it had real application to my life. If someone would have told me that in high school it would have given meaning to it.

I guess my questions are as follows:

If you are a dominant do you feel it is appropriate for your submissive/slave to ask why they are to do something? Will you answer them as to why they are to do something?

If you are a submissive/slave do you feel comfortable to ask your dominant person why they are having you do something?

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RE: That "Why" Question - 10/24/2006 6:39:18 PM

juliaoceania

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From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LeatherBentOne

Sinergy and julia,

Why do I get such a warm and fuzzy feeling that the two of you are a terrific match? I admire both your viewpoints and most certainly wish you the best to come. Enjoyed your banter immensely at the beginning of the thread.

LBO

Thank you so much for your kind words.

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Post #: 122

RE: That "Why" Question - 10/24/2006 6:45:41 PM

juliaoceania

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quote:

I absolutely encourage my slave to ask me "Why." If for no other reason, it builds TRUST in that he can see that I do not come to my conclusions, or make my rules, indiscrimately. I have a rhyme and reason to everything I do, and once he understands how I think and reason, he will in fact be a better slave for it because he can operate independently of direction, as well as giving him a better understanding of me.

This response struck a note with me, and it is something that I rather agree with. It is not that I lack trust so much as I am building more as we go along. It just helps me to understand what is expected of me when he isn't around (which because we live a few hours apart at this point is much of the time). If I understand the "why" of his decision making when he feels it is appropriate, it helps me to determine how he may feel about what I do or handle things when he is not around... Acting independently is an important part of many dynamics. Thanks for responding!

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RE: That "Why" Question - 10/26/2006 2:21:28 PM

MasterWilliam55

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Generally speaking a Dominant is supposed to explain to a sub, why she is being given a task. It may be for punishment or disipline, in which case she/he needs to know for what reason she is being punished or disiplined. How else would she know what behavior to correct? It may be for training, in which case she /he needs to see the goal you are training for. Many submissives need a lot of attention....they want to know there Master is both paying attention to her/him and thinking about them when they are not together. Tasks and duties help accomplish a lot of things....but they have to have meaning and purpose, and the Master should explain what that meaning or purpose is.

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RE: That "Why" Question - 10/26/2006 4:17:46 PM

kyraofMists

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterWilliam55
Tasks and duties help accomplish a lot of things....but they have to have meaning and purpose, and the Master should explain what that meaning or purpose is.

Do you explain the meaning or purpose of every task that you assign? Every time you tell them to get you a glass of water, get your shoes, get your coat, make the bed, cook supper, clean the house, do the laundry, etc. do you explain why they need to do it each and every time you tell them to do it?

As a slave I don't need to know why I have to do something for him. That he wants it done is good enough for me.

Knight's kyra

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Post #: 125

RE: That "Why" Question - 11/6/2006 6:48:25 AM

MasterWilliam55

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kyraofmists,

No I don't....not regarding the smaller things, like getting a glass of water. A service slave, lives to serve, I shouldn't have to ask for a glass of water. She would be asking me if I want one. On larger isssues such as disipline or punishment, I do explain.

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RE: That "Why" Question - 11/6/2006 7:12:09 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterWilliam55
No I don't....not regarding the smaller things, like getting a glass of water. A service slave, lives to serve, I shouldn't have to ask for a glass of water. She would be asking me if I want one. On larger isssues such as disipline or punishment, I do explain.

That's only if you've trained her to do so. Some masters want proactive service and some masters NEVER want proactive service.

Service subs/slaves just means they are oriented to be fulfilled from serving others. The MANNER in which they serve is highly fluid and easily trained. Their service should not be discounted just because it doesn't fit into how you prefer yours to be trained.

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RE: That "Why" Question - 11/6/2006 1:55:45 PM

MasterWilliam55

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Your right LA in the sense that each Master will determine the level or type of service he wishes from a service slave. But historically a service slave was a particular type of slave with proactive duties. Just as a Master may ask his slave to go into High Protocol mode, or general mode, he may require them to go into service mode. This is contraversial in todays community. Some Masters may require his slave be trained in various modes or forms of slavery. Some do not. I only speak for myself.

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Post #: 128

RE: That "Why" Question - 11/6/2006 3:19:13 PM

juliaoceania

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What tradition do you practice this protocol?

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Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

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Post #: 129