RE: Dommes wanting too much respect

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Dommes wanting too much respect

Page: << < prev 1 [2] 3 4 5 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 9:22:26 AM

MadamShy

Posts: 173
Joined: 3/21/2006
Status: offline

I don't like to be treated rough Back I am blunt and to the point I agree with Benji... if you don't like My profile and how rough and My rules then Move on ...go to another ...

I am flexible .. But not with someone I haven't met yet .. follow the steps to Meet Me that I put on the Profile I have reasons I ask for what I ask for and reasons for asking it done a certian way ..

_____________________________

Madam Shy
Head Domina
Bitch of Club Hell
Providence RI

(in reply to gooddogbenji)

Post #: 21

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 9:23:39 AM

MisPandora

Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

Hate to be overly disrespectful and get flamed, but I think the OP was referring to the boards, not the other side.

Now, can I be your slave?

What if I say I like your ass?

Why did you slap me?

Yours,

benji

Next you'll say OW! and really bore hell out of us all.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to gooddogbenji)

Post #: 22

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 9:26:04 AM

gooddogbenji

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Morrigel

For one thing--courtesy to others is not just a gift you give to them if they "earn" it. It is something you display in your dealings with the world because you respect yourself. If your default attitude toward others is rude and snotty, you are not showing any kind of strength; you are displaying a weakness of character and poor upbringing--or poor training, if you have served a dominant before.

Courtesy and respect are very different. Rudeness and disrespect are different. I agree that generally, courtesy is good to give out, despite the fact that I choose to be an ass on these boards (and in real life, more likely than not. I'd ask my girlfriend, but her mouth is full right now.)

quote:

Regardless, I see that you don't bother to dispute the trends I have described. The fact is, male submissives are incredibly obnoxious posters here on Collarme, and they display rudeness and a grotesque sense of entitlement which are far more rare in female submissives.

I will agree with that if, and only if, you add in the quantifier "many."

Yours,

benji

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to Morrigel)

Post #: 23

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 9:28:12 AM

Lordandmaster

Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline

One basic truth I've learned about interpersonal communication is that what someone gives out, they're willing to get back. If someone is vulgar, they're ready for someone to be vulgar back. If someone is blunt, they're ready for someone to be blunt back. If someone can dish it out but can't take the same dish handed back to them, you can't have any kind of discussion with that person; you just have to write him or her off, because that person is trying to be a bully, not trying to communicate.

Like the OP, I used to get annoyed on CM whenever I'd say something controversial and domme after domme would post something nasty about little old me. Well, that ended as soon as I realized my golden rule of communication. If I'm saying something controversial, I have to be ready for the flak that comes back; and if dommes say something harsh, they'd better be ready for some flak too.

Oh, and for other curmudgeons like me: Flak stands for "Flugabwehrkannone"; it was the ground-to-air anti-aircraft weapon of the Nazi army. It's not flack; it's not slack. It's flak.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadamShy

I don't like to be treated rough Back

(in reply to MadamShy)

Post #: 24

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 9:34:20 AM

SweetDommes

Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline

I think your biggest problem, imtempting, is that you appear to go out of your way sometimes just to stir up trouble. If you really have an opinion that is against everyone else's, then by all means, state it and stick up for it ... but if you are just disagreeing to be a pain (which is what it seems that you are doing a good number of the times you post) then ... yeah, we're gonna react.

I have to say that, yes, I expect a certain amount of respect - because I am a person. I expect to be treated with courtesy until I prove that I'm not worthy of it. I expect to not open up my mailbox to such e-mails as mentioned above ... and worse. I expect people to read the profile that I have put up for Holly and myself, and to respect what I have put in it. I expect people to understand that we have standards relating to what we are looking for - and that we are not going to lower our standards just because someone is pissy that he doesn't meet them. If femsubs treated male Dominants like most of the male subs who have contacted us have treated us, then I'm sure they would be reacting in about the same ways that Holly, myself, and other female Dominants react. And as other people pointed out, with the large number of threads about "what's wrong with women on this site" and "why are there no (no fee) Dommes" etc ... it's obvious that the responses we make on the other side are spilling over here - when they are rejected on the other side, they come here to whine, accuse, abuse, flame, whatever they are feeling like at the moment.

Honestly, for the most part, those Dommes who are really Dominant and not just trying to scam someone out of a few bucks aren't asking for "too much" respect - we are asking for the same respect that other people get.

< Message edited by SweetDommes -- 10/28/2006 9:39:37 AM >

(in reply to PoeticPrincess)

Post #: 25

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 9:42:04 AM

angelic

Posts: 1807
Joined: 1/24/2005
Status: offline

~stands up and applaudes~ very well said.

_____________________________

~....and once you have tasted flight, you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been and there you long to return.~ -- Leonardo de Vinci

(in reply to SweetDommes)

Post #: 26

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 9:44:34 AM

Morrigel

Posts: 492
Joined: 10/13/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji
Courtesy and respect are very different. Rudeness and disrespect are different.

In the context of personal communication, especially on boards like this one, they are very similar. And so far as who has earned what, as a general rule--did one of these over-so-bad rude nasty ol' DOMMES start this thread?

No, they did not. Most of the threads started by female dominants on this board are begun out of desire to either receive or impart useful information, to satisfy curiosity, or to sound out others about their experiences, feelings etc..

I have rarely (and this I mean freaking NEVER) seen a domme on this board deliberately troll the forum to bait male dominants about the "true nature of men", snark at them about how all of them are just "over-compensating", or jump in to undermine their public authority the way men like "Lord and Master" do. And I have seen far, far fewer threads from femme dommes bitching about male subs than vice versa as well.

To be honest, I suspect that if any femme domme tried to cop the rudely patronizing attitude toward dominant men that certain people on this forum display toward dominant women, she would be flamed into the freaking stone age. And rightly so, in my opinion. It is simply spoiler behavior, an attempt to make others feel attacked and unwelcome.

Whatever. The fact that both male doms and male subs on this forum think it is cute, justified or funny to rudely bait female dominants does not impress me. I ignore posts from such men for the most part, for a reason--I do not enjoy being dominated by men, and having men try to manipulate me into being irrationally angry is every bit as tiresome as them trying to make me get down on my knees and gratify them in any other way.

The only reason I am replying to this thread at all is because I get sick of the Endless Repetition Technique, where people say the same untrue thing over and over until it becomes consensus reality. The problem is not that female dominants demand too much respect. The problem is that men on this forum have so little to give.

--M

< Message edited by Morrigel -- 10/28/2006 9:46:45 AM >

(in reply to gooddogbenji)

Post #: 27

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 9:45:43 AM

candystripper

Posts: 3486
Joined: 11/1/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: imtempting

Now I am seeing this more and more on these boards. Alot of dommes are wanting every sub male to pretty much just agree with them.

Anyone who does not agree with them gets vindicted and flamed.

The dominantes ( the males ) do actually behave and treat sub females with respect and respects their comments. Even if they do disagree.

Where I am noticing the dommes are expecting the male subs to pretty much keep in line and not piss them off.

Out of most of tje people ive been annoying has been dommes. I dont recall many male dominates abusing me.

So I think the females domme of these boards should get real and stop acting like stuck up idiots.

That is not directed at every domme as many are fine but many others are stuck up...

Now atleast poeple wont need to hijack other threads and can just flame me in here..

Crickey; you're getting off easy, imtempting. Every Master, Dom and sub male who regularly posts here has taken me to task at one time or another. i don't completely understand what constitutes "too much" respect. How can A/anyone be treated with enough respect? W/we all fail at times; speak harshly to a cashier or even a family member.

i agree there are P/pl on this board W/who think T/their word is the very last one on certain subjects. i myself am one such person; i have some fiercely-held opinions and think E/everyone with half a brain should agree with me on those topics. While that will never change, i can make myself a bit less strident and raucous in my speech. i can at least consider the possibility that S/someone else's opinion might have some validity, at least for T/them. However, it took me many years of life's hard knocks to make that determination.

In a conflict with a particular person, IMO, you have two choices: block or email. Frankly, i don't think A/anyone enjoys watching two members make ad hominieum attacks on E/each O/other in a thread.

i am sure you have made many helpful, informative posts and will continue to do so. Maybe you are right, and some members do not like you. So what? This is the 'net. T/they don't know you and never will. What reason would you have for needing the approval of A/anyone here apart from your friends?

When you put s'thing in writing and post it here, P/pl are gonna react. Some are gonna misunderstand...wrtten words have no nuances and cadence, so things like sarcasm cannot really be used. i admit i haven't been around much lately, but frankly, i don't see A/anyone doing A/anything to you that hasn't happened to me...and to most regulars.

Have a Happy Halloween,

candystripper

(in reply to imtempting)

Post #: 28

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 9:55:37 AM

UnvailedPurpose

Posts: 61
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline

Imtempting:
Indeed there are instances where alleging dominants forward e-mails making irrational demands that I am firmly convinced are based upon the belief each or every male who claims subordination does so out of desperateness and/or reduced self-esteem.
Certainly, those females and their comments warrant no recognition and complaining on the boards about the inadequacy or the emotionally bankrupt perceptions they have submerged themselves in will not have a positive effect.

(in reply to imtempting)

Post #: 29

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 10:39:38 AM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

Like many that posted on this thread, I do not believe there is a such thing as wanting too much respect. There is a difference between wanting respect and demanding adulation and worship.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to imtempting)

Post #: 30

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 11:03:33 AM

Mikal

Posts: 3673
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

You ask for my respect, you'll notice that it's a flaming bag of dogshit on your porch.

Completely off topic here, but... benji (and others), how 'bout respecting people because they are people... lose respect for them later when they prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that they have no worth besides filtering air through their lungs? And benji, what sort of hallowe'en pranks do you pull????

_____________________________

You know that I am a sexy penguin.

(in reply to gooddogbenji)

Post #: 31

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 11:06:40 AM

Mikal

Posts: 3673
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MySweetSubmssive

Is it "too much respect" to ask for:

A lively, intelligent, original first letter of introduction
To be treated as well as a woman you would be interested in dating, which includes not being treated to all the intimate details of your fantasies immediately, and being seen as more than a conduit for your fetishes
Courtesy that extends beyond getting what you want (i.e. real courtesy)

YES!!! Now you've got it!!! How can you even think to ask for that kind of respect??? Sheesh... some people!

*note to the sensitive types... this is SARCASM*

_____________________________

You know that I am a sexy penguin.

(in reply to MySweetSubmssive)

Post #: 32

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 11:13:22 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: imtempting

Now I am seeing this more and more on these boards. Alot of dommes are wanting every sub male to pretty much just agree with them.

Anyone who does not agree with them gets vindicted and flamed.

The dominantes ( the males ) do actually behave and treat sub females with respect and respects their comments. Even if they do disagree.

Where I am noticing the dommes are expecting the male subs to pretty much keep in line and not piss them off.

Out of most of tje people ive been annoying has been dommes. I dont recall many male dominates abusing me.

So I think the females domme of these boards should get real and stop acting like stuck up idiots.

That is not directed at every domme as many are fine but many others are stuck up...

Now atleast poeple wont need to hijack other threads and can just flame me in here..

Okay, before I read anyyyyyyyyyyy further I am going to say this. Several of the male submissives that post regularly on the forums I have disagreed with on more than one occasion. I remember specifically benji and I bantering back and forth on a subject though I do not remember what it was about. I have great respect, I mean HUGE, for anyone that can disagree with maturity and civility, not resort to the childish bullshit that is all to common on the forums. How utterly boring life would be if everyone agreed with me on everything. I enjoy a healthy debate, I learn from it, get to see the subject from a different perspective, occasionally I even change mine.

Additionally, I do not demand respect from anyone on here. I prefer to earn it based upon my behaviour. If someone disrespects me I feel it reflects on me and my actions/words, sometimes on their stupidity...

... but those are the people I could give a shit about anyway. If my way of thinking makes me less a dominant in someone else's eyes I really could give a shit. My opinion of myself is more important to me than some stranger that really has no clue of the woman I really am.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to imtempting)

Post #: 33

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 11:15:15 AM

gooddogbenji

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mikal

Completely off topic here, but... benji (and others), how 'bout respecting people because they are people... lose respect for them later when they prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that they have no worth besides filtering air through their lungs? And benji, what sort of hallowe'en pranks do you pull????

Without meaning to become the definition guy (much like the smelly guy and the nosepicker, not really popular around the office) I looked it up.

There were a few dictionaries listed, but most definitions had similar traits - show or feel deference, admiration, have a high opinion of, esteem.

Now, none of those things I do of a stranger. Therefore, I don't respect other people for being people. Being born takes no skill. Making it to your 40th birthday shows mostly lack of bad luck. Why should I respect you for that?

As to the Hallowe'en pranks, the last people that asked became targets. Don't ask.

Yours,

benji

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to Mikal)

Post #: 34

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 11:29:36 AM

Mikal

Posts: 3673
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji
There were a few dictionaries listed, but most definitions had similar traits - show or feel deference, admiration, have a high opinion of, esteem.

According to my dictionary (encarta), respect (the type I was refering to) means the following:
Thoughtfulness: consideration or thoughtfulness towards self and others
Be considerate toward somebody or something: to show consideration or thoughtfulness in relation to somebody or something.

Basically, be nice & be polite.

quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenjiAs to the Hallowe'en pranks, the last people that asked became targets. Don't ask.

I already did... besides, you don't know where I live...

_____________________________

You know that I am a sexy penguin.

(in reply to gooddogbenji)

Post #: 35

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 11:32:49 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

Feeling safe at such a distance......Yes benji, what are this years Halloween pranks???

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to gooddogbenji)

Post #: 36

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 11:40:53 AM

gooddogbenji

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
Status: offline

No worries, LaT, you'll see 'em on the news.

And Mikal, if that's the definition, then still no. I choose to be an ass.

However, in real life, I'm too much of a pansy to be anything but respectful to anyone but third graders.

Yours,

benji

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Post #: 37

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 11:42:48 AM

Mikal

Posts: 3673
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

I choose to be an ass.

Well, at least you're honest, and are a cute ass! lol

_____________________________

You know that I am a sexy penguin.

(in reply to gooddogbenji)

Post #: 38

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 11:43:58 AM

gooddogbenji

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
Status: offline

Have you seen it? I can bounce quarters off of it!

Yours,

benji

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to Mikal)

Post #: 39

RE: Dommes wanting too much respect - 10/28/2006 11:59:08 AM

Lordandmaster

Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline

Where'd you learn that, in the military?

(in reply to gooddogbenji)

Post #: 40

Page: << < prev 1 [2] 3 4 5 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Dommes wanting too much respect

Page: << < prev 1 [2] 3 4 5 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.094