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RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 4/30/2007 2:29:45 PM   
UKEvolutionary


Posts: 60
Joined: 11/20/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MellowSir

I've always been courteous when messaging a sub. I think that many women, in particular, tend to lump all men together into a stereotype, thinking we're all out just to get laid, therefore don't answer even those that aren't.....hell I don't know lol, I'm surprised the thread even made it to four pages, I expected to be shot down rather quickly with all the reasons NOT to answer lol. How about some help and tell me what does get an answer lol


In simple terms ...... patience and not posting such a topic such as this !! Out there ARE true people and true subs, a LOT of those have been "hit" upon by complete assholes, wannabees And fakes. I KNOW it's frustrating, but you HAVE to understand that not all will answer. Hell, I've known some ladies that have answered with a polite "Thanks but No thanks" and have been messaged back with insults and comparing them to a raving lesbian !!!!  If they are genuinely interested, they will message you back, but what I'm trying to say is, even though for YOU it's manners to reply, for others the reply "May" be either misconstrued as a "possible" or may get an insulting post back !!they don't know you, they have NO idea, so it's best, just to ignore it.

(in reply to MellowSir)
Profile   Post #: 101
RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 4/30/2007 4:21:49 PM   
heartfeltsub


Posts: 1641
Joined: 11/5/2004
Status: offline 		Have just recently had an experience which goes along with this thread. i have tried in the past to answer most emails that i receive. As i don't have a photo and i distinctly say that i'm not looking cuts down on the number of emails that i get so that the number is managable. However in trying to be polite and answer a total stranger's email, i was informed how wrong i was to not deactivate my profile because i'm not looking. Getting responses like that just makes me not want to answer unrequested emails.

heartfelt

(in reply to UKEvolutionary)
Profile   Post #: 102
RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 4/30/2007 8:22:54 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline 		To the OP..Maybe then you should start sending no thank you notes to every person who contacts you via snail mail..like...your neighborhood tire salesman, or the advertisers for the 50% off sale they have coming up this weekend. Got the point?..Tempting

(in reply to WhiplashSmile)
Profile   Post #: 103
RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 5/1/2007 6:16:43 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub

To the OP..Maybe then you should start sending no thank you notes to every person who contacts you via snail mail..like...your neighborhood tire salesman, or the advertisers for the 50% off sale they have coming up this weekend. Got the point?..Tempting


One major difference in this.  If you received free email here, it's free.  No visit to the post office for stamps.  Get the point?

(in reply to TemptingNviceSub)
Profile   Post #: 104
RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 5/1/2007 7:01:44 AM   
SweetlySubmissve


Posts: 14
Joined: 4/10/2006
Status: offline 		Personally, I respond (or at least try) to every msg in my inbox. I think that if they took the time to send me one, I should at least extend the curtsey of at least telling them I'm not interested.

My momma raised me with manners. :)

becca

_____________________________

"There's a smile when the pain comes. The pain's gonna make everything alright..." - The Black Crows, 'She Talks to Angels'

Yeah, I'm a slight massochist.

(in reply to SweetMegan20)
Profile   Post #: 105
RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 5/1/2007 8:08:50 AM   
amuzingtoyou


Posts: 144
Joined: 6/27/2006
Status: offline 		Sweetly submissive,
if you choose to respond..thats your choice. But it is not about manners. I didn't ask anyone to write to me. I didn't ask for every horny net geek to write to me saying whats your cup size. I don't feel i need to respond to everyone. I just choose not to waste my time. My mama raised me with manners but she also raised me to not put up with bs.
missi

(in reply to SweetlySubmissve)
Profile   Post #: 106
RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 5/1/2007 8:21:57 AM   
MistressSassy66


Posts: 1675
Joined: 11/5/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MellowSir

First and foremost, this is NOT a post critical of the sincere sub that searches. Enough of the excuses already, such as "I get too many messages to answer them all"(Then don't advertise and expect not to), "I'm taken"(then why list as seeking),  etc etc. Not all that difficult to type "I'm interested" or "no thanks" and click reply. Even if the sub is not interested, does that have to equal a lack of courtesy by not replying at all? Why even allow the double standard or prolong the use of it.  I at least take the time to respond to someone who takes the time to message me. Maybe the expectations are a bit too high on the professed "sub's" part if she/he is just there and doesn't reply to anyone at all. A dom who acts the jerk or like the person already belongs to them when they haven't even met may deserve that, the one who is sincere doesn't.



I'm guilty of not replying,simply because they are way too far away.
Maybe I didnt like what they wrote and wrote them off.
Lately I have been gone a lot and havent been near a PC so I couldnt answer letters,as soon as I could I got on and replied in some cases though it was close to a month later.
I try to keep in mind that people really are busy.
If I never get a reply back I assume they have moved on and I do the same.

_____________________________

Mistress Sassy

http://www.mistresssassy.com

In the Immortal Words of Bob....Fuck the dumb shit.

"I love you not only for what you are,But for what I am when I'm with you."- Opening line from a poem by Roy Croft

(in reply to MellowSir)
Profile   Post #: 107
RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 5/1/2007 8:39:34 AM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline
quote:

My momma raised me with manners. :)


I'll send you my silly pm's and you can respond for me.  Here's a recent one:

Do you have experience giving or receiving enemas?

I don't think it's rude not to answer that sort of nonsense.




_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to SweetlySubmissve)
Profile   Post #: 108
RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 5/1/2007 3:06:12 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub

To the OP..Maybe then you should start sending no thank you notes to every person who contacts you via snail mail..like...your neighborhood tire salesman, or the advertisers for the 50% off sale they have coming up this weekend. Got the point?..Tempting


One major difference in this.  If you received free email here, it's free.  No visit to the post office for stamps.  Get the point?
Yes that is a major difference..but definitely not...... my ......point...Tempting

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 109
RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 5/2/2007 8:51:27 AM   
MstrssPassion


Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SweetlySubmissve

Personally, I respond (or at least try) to every msg in my inbox. I think that if they took the time to send me one, I should at least extend the curtsey of at least telling them I'm not interested.

My momma raised me with manners. :)

becca


ok.... then how would you respond to something like this.... I just received this note

Hello
Just took a close look at your profile and i must say you seem like a very good looking man. I would really love to get to know you. Let me tell you a little about myself.I like having fun and i do not like having dull moments.I am a very honest, open minded woman who is seaching for a partner who is also the same.I am looking for a man who is honest, trustworthy,open minded, loving, caring, responsible, bold: a man who is worth sacrifising all for , a man who is worth spending a fun life with. Would love to meet you and i will love to chat with you on yahoo messnger,feel free to mail me to my email (edited to remove), i will be waiting to hear from you. (removed sender's name)

Y'all check my profile & tell me if there is any way that this person could have taken a close look at it & come to the conclusion that I am a good looking man?



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MstrssPassion


(in reply to SweetlySubmissve)
Profile   Post #: 110
RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 5/2/2007 9:02:41 AM   
DarkMstrs


Posts: 3
Joined: 5/12/2006
Status: offline 		As a Dom, what continues to amaze me is when a sub/slave contacts me, and after a few weeks of emails/IMs and things are looking to be acceptable to both parties involved and arrangments are made to meet for an inspection, they(sub/slave) suddenly " dont know if this lifestlye is what they're really wanting, but thanks anyway".It never seems to end. Honesty has always been my main objective, but it things dont seem to ever go anywhere. I guess patience is suppose to be a virtue.

(in reply to MstrssPassion)
Profile   Post #: 111
RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 5/2/2007 9:08:34 AM   
MstrssPassion


Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkMstrs

As a Dom, what continues to amaze me is when a sub/slave contacts me, and after a few weeks of emails/IMs and things are looking to be acceptable to both parties involved and arrangments are made to meet for an inspection, they(sub/slave) suddenly " dont know if this lifestlye is what they're really wanting, but thanks anyway".It never seems to end. Honesty has always been my main objective, but it things dont seem to ever go anywhere. I guess patience is suppose to be a virtue.


you can't view it as such a negative thing... it far better to weed these jerks out from an online point rather than meet with them, possibly bond to the point of play or more & then feel like a used piece of meat when they "change their mind" about being part of this

count your blessings they proved themselves in this manner prior to any real investment of self

(still waiting for some feedback on my previous post)

< Message edited by MstrssPassion -- 5/2/2007 9:10:20 AM >

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MstrssPassion


(in reply to DarkMstrs)
Profile   Post #: 112
RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 5/2/2007 11:38:15 AM   
roadscholar


Posts: 21
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrssPassion


Y'all check my profile & tell me if there is any way that this person could have taken a close look at it & come to the conclusion that I am a good looking man?




Mistress, if they think you're a man then they're either blind or stupid!

(in reply to MstrssPassion)
Profile   Post #: 113
RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 5/2/2007 1:07:17 PM   
Aileen68


Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline 		You have the best back tattoo.
Stef does too.

(in reply to MstrssPassion)
Profile   Post #: 114
RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 5/2/2007 1:28:14 PM   
daniL


Posts: 46
Joined: 4/12/2007
Status: offline 		Fast Reply

I don't think that this has anything to do with politeness. I'm not a sub, but for some reason [and if my profile reads like I'm a sub, it's not intentional], I've gotten several messages from men who want subs. Also, my girl gets emails both demanding and requesting that she submit to guys too. This is annoying. When men send out messages that read, "Ready to submit, slave?" and that's all, I am not going to respond. Even if I want to be polite, I take this the same way that I take getting hollared at in the street [and maybe my POV is different because I live in NYC]. When you respond, even to say you're not interested, you get harassed. I've even gotten emails from people who are specifically people who I've clashed with on this site [I've only clashed with one person on this site, and this person eventually messaged both me and my girl...wanting us to sub to him and emailing us, essentially, with his profile]. There is no reason to respond to these emails because I want to avoid harassment.


(in reply to Aileen68)
Profile   Post #: 115
RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 5/2/2007 2:09:22 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline
quote:

"Ready to submit, slave?"


Hey, that's polite.
One of my favorites:  "On your knees, whore."  So classy.




_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to daniL)
Profile   Post #: 116
RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 5/2/2007 3:50:04 PM   
adoracat


Posts: 1779
Joined: 2/16/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SweetlySubmissve

Personally, I respond (or at least try) to every msg in my inbox. I think that if they took the time to send me one, I should at least extend the curtsey of at least telling them I'm not interested.

My momma raised me with manners. :)

becca


huzzah, and seconded.  however, i've also sent out many "i'm flattered that you messaged me, but i dont think that either one of us is what the other is looking for" messages....not to mention the many more "thank you for messaging me, but i'm no longer looking for anything past friendship" ones lately.

i've also gotten the "i like your profile" ones....but my profile clearly states i'm Owned....so why would the next message ask me "what are you looking for in a Master?"  or worse yet, assume that because i DID answer that i am looking to decieve Him?  dominants who begin flinging about orders on the first message (and i'm including male AND female dominants) assuming that submissive means "will take orders from anyone".

i guess i didnt get that memo, that dominant means "can be rude to anyone who says they're submissive".  i'm going to treat people with respect till they prove they dont deserve it, but that's my personal response.

kitten, whose mama tried to raise her to be a good girl, but ended up raising a good submissive instead

(in reply to SweetlySubmissve)
Profile   Post #: 117
RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 5/2/2007 4:00:35 PM   
PONYSEEKER


Posts: 364
Joined: 9/11/2006
Status: offline 		I think since I have been on CM I have had maybe 5 or 6 email where the people didnt respond.  I allways wonder when I see posts like this how many unanswered email they really have out there and what they are saying to so ignored...lol

(in reply to adoracat)
Profile   Post #: 118
RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 5/2/2007 4:02:19 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub

To the OP..Maybe then you should start sending no thank you notes to every person who contacts you via snail mail..like...your neighborhood tire salesman, or the advertisers for the 50% off sale they have coming up this weekend. Got the point?..Tempting


One major difference in this.  If you received free email here, it's free.  No visit to the post office for stamps.  Get the point?
Yes that is a major difference..but definitely not...... my ......point...Tempting


Perhaps I am missing it then. 

(in reply to TemptingNviceSub)
Profile   Post #: 119
RE: Lack of sincerity/excuses - 5/2/2007 5:46:58 PM   
happypervert


Posts: 2203
Joined: 5/11/2004
From: Scranton, PA
Status: offline
quote:

My momma raised me with manners. :)

Well, I think she did a lousy job of it because tossing in a snarky comment like that is essentially insulting anyone who doesn't do what you do by saying they don't have manners. With luck, the next time you say something like that momma will slap you upside the head and teach you some more manners.




< Message edited by happypervert -- 5/2/2007 5:49:38 PM >

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(in reply to SweetlySubmissve)
Profile   Post #: 120
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