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Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 11:50:47 AM   
temptressofsouls


Posts: 208
Joined: 3/29/2005
From: Toledo, OH
Status: offline 		You're knee-deep in your search for the "perfect" Dom/sub/switch, or what have you, and you think you've found the right person. You (or they) have iniated contact, perhaps you've talked a few times online, or on the phone, and maybe have even met in person once or twice. Things are going swimmingly, and you cant wait to see/talk to them again. You get along well and have a lot of similar interests, perhaps. But then, during casual conversation, they mention: the DEALBREAKER. Something about them, or something they like, sends you screeching to a halt and high-tailing it in the other direction. What is it, and why?

Or, conversely, YOU are that "other person" and something YOU said makes people turn and run. What is it?

When I was searching, it included: marriage, another relationship, drugs, smoking, heavy electroplay. I have a Dominant friend, whenever He mentions His main fetish, hypnosis,  the people run away faster than anything.

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RE: Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 11:53:06 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		I personally wouldn't start thinking someone was "the right one" for a good long while after all those general talks which would eliminate almost all the "deal breakers"

Until then they'd be a "potential candidate"

http://www.collarchat.com/m_526440/mpage_1/key_breaker/tm.htm#526448
Deal Breakers

http://www.collarchat.com/m_154756/mpage_1/key_deal%252Cbreakers/tm.htm#154756
deal breakers (2)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_950788/mpage_1/key_deal/tm.htm#950805
deal breakers (3)

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to temptressofsouls)
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RE: Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 11:53:54 AM   
temptressofsouls


Posts: 208
Joined: 3/29/2005
From: Toledo, OH
Status: offline 		Well, not the One necessarily...but heavily interested and enthused.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
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RE: Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 11:54:58 AM   
NakedGirlScout


Posts: 370
Joined: 1/10/2006
From: Toronto
Status: offline 		Very interesting topic, temptressofsouls.
I had quite a long list of deal-breakers, but the one which caused the most noise was that I wouldn't get involved with anyone who had ever been in a military or law enforcement career. The poor man who was informed of this very often reacted as if he'd been spit on, and it sometimes devolved into him screaming at me that I was unpatriotic, that I didn't deserve to live in a free country, etc. etc. All because I personally did not want to have a romantic relationship with this kind of background. Oh well, what can you do? :)

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RE: Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 11:57:27 AM   
temptressofsouls


Posts: 208
Joined: 3/29/2005
From: Toledo, OH
Status: offline 		I had totally forgotten about that one, but it was one of mine as well.

I once had Someone show up in His fatigues. Didnt send me running right away, but added to the other crap that he was slinging, it all added up.

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RE: Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 12:00:03 PM   
SardonicAss


Posts: 32
Status: offline 		Why don't you like cops or military? That has to be the strangest dealbreaker I've ever heard.

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RE: Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 12:03:53 PM   
temptressofsouls


Posts: 208
Joined: 3/29/2005
From: Toledo, OH
Status: offline 		Cops are ok, theoretically. I've never been involved with one.

But the military thing is just a personal preference. In this area, we have a decent amount of military, and I've watched a lot of people go in and come back....The military changes people, in a bad way. I dont mean to be vague, but its not the same for everyone, so I cant give you a laundry list.

I just really dont think i'd be comfortable with someone military, with some exceptions.

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RE: Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 12:03:56 PM   
NakedGirlScout


Posts: 370
Joined: 1/10/2006
From: Toronto
Status: offline 		I like them fine... as friends or neighbors! Sorry, I'm not comfortable discussing my personal reasons on public boards, and feel no need to defend my preferences, but you're welcome to email my profile to discuss it if you'd like.

(in reply to SardonicAss)
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RE: Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 12:08:12 PM   
tornaway


Posts: 174
Joined: 4/14/2007
Status: offline 		  Yes - there can be many unexpected hurdles to
 
happiness !    As I'm seeking a partner, as well as
 
someone to tie to my dining room table  ( hee-hee) ,
 
finding out there's a spouse is a biggie with me .    Or  
 
finding out on meeting  that ,  in spite of a long list of
 
things in common - in person there simply is no spark -
 
no sense of real connection .  Or they smell bad  .  Or
 
they look nothing like their picture   ( after I really liked
 
their picture  ) !    Or they make some sort of racist ,  or
 
heavy duty religious statement during conversation .   
 
 Or they disclose that they're living with their parents , 
 
or their 4 kids are living with them .   "Uh - forgot to
 
mention it earlier .. "
 
 
    But every now and then - sometimes - it all works !  

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RE: Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 12:09:40 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		I wouldn't do enlisted either, marines, navy (despite all those hot navy boys in Annapolis, yum!), air force- ANYTHING which had such control over our lives to such an extent they could tell him to go away to dangerous places for months or years.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to NakedGirlScout)
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RE: Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 12:10:04 PM   
LadyMorghanna


Posts: 17
Joined: 4/23/2007
Status: offline 		I learned the hard way to be very careful of divorced men with preteen and teen daughters.

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RE: Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 12:11:34 PM   
temptressofsouls


Posts: 208
Joined: 3/29/2005
From: Toledo, OH
Status: offline 		Is that just because the daughters get envious of the attention you're stealing?

Or too much drama all around?

(in reply to LadyMorghanna)
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RE: Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 12:12:09 PM   
gypsygrl


Posts: 1471
Joined: 10/8/2005
From: new york state
Status: offline 		I get real nervous when someone doesn't do what they say they're gonna do and it generally leads me to ask a lot of pressing questions.

If I'm gonna submit to someone it means I have to have faith in their word.  If they don't follow through on their words, I start having a lot of doubts.


_____________________________

“To be happy is to be able to become aware of oneself without fright.” ~Walter Benjamin


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RE: Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 12:14:44 PM   
mstrjx


Posts: 2045
Joined: 11/27/2005
Status: offline 		I have dealbreakers when looking for another.  Conversely, I probably am the embodiment of other's dealbreakers.  It's the nature of the beast.

What I have found the last few years is that the 'only' way to figure things out in a timely manner is to forget about 'getting-to-know-you' until you've ferreted out said dealbreakers, on both sides.

If you can survive THAT, you might just have something there.  But don't waste time getting 'involved' only to have things go awry later.

Jeff

_____________________________

Know thyself. It's the best gift you can ever give yourself.

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RE: Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 12:51:55 PM   
MariaB


Posts: 2969
Joined: 4/3/2007
Status: offline 		Body odour and halitosis

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RE: Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 12:58:15 PM   
LadyMorghanna


Posts: 17
Joined: 4/23/2007
Status: offline 		Hello Temptressofsouls.....I married a man with a teen daughter. She was angry that mom and dad got divorced. She wanted dad all to herself. In the time we were married she went from angry to downright frightening. I have found since then that most children of divorced men want their parents back together and they are not ready to cut anyone new in their parent's life any slack. I don't need that kind of drama in my life.

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RE: Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 12:59:15 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		Deal breakers...
#5  Wanting to see me with an animal
#4  "Is that your daughter?  Wow she is hot. I have always wanted to do a mother daughter team"
#3  "I have herpes, or some other STD"
#2  Once we are together I really want you to become my slave..

And the number one deal breaker?

#1..

GOR

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley


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RE: Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 1:15:48 PM   
temptressofsouls


Posts: 208
Joined: 3/29/2005
From: Toledo, OH
Status: offline 		Yeah, Gor was an all out full-stop NO for me, too.

*nods at LadyMorghanna*  I could see that happening, pretty easily. Though I know I personally wasnt that way as a teen-I was excited to have another woman to look up to. Too bad my stepmom's NOT one of those.

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RE: Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 1:28:35 PM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline 		Yep. On this site you might have a few more deal breakers than in your everyday walk through this world.....Hmmm...Deal Breakers uniue to this...Gor, Wiccans...Although there is something that would be fun about tangling with a witch as long as she was clean and didn't have an excessive amount of snails or such in her snatch. I think I will also being staying away from Druids...No idea why but just a guideline to go by....Also someone who has just been to damaged by life that makes them simply unpalatable, it does seem like there might be a tad bit more of that here than elsewhere.

_____________________________



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RE: Deal breakers. - 4/27/2007 1:29:39 PM   
m0rgan


Posts: 403
Joined: 3/19/2007
Status: offline 		i list my details on my profile, i am an open book! on the other hand, everyone has a second set of books, don't they?
if i revealed that i shagged stoats, played poker till i was broke and hung around mens toilets on sundays, just how many women would consider me (i would of course, be interested in the answer to that question, and it may lead to an approach!) but consider that question hypothetical for the moment!!


_____________________________


download this, the girls voice will make you damp--->

http://www.saab.com/main/GLOBAL/en/download_release_me.shtml


a loaf of bread, a jug of wine and thou,
beside me, in the wilderness, were paradise enough!

(in reply to temptressofsouls)
Profile   Post #: 20
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